Home > The Melting Pot > Homophobia Is Gay!

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jessloui
Homophobia Is Gay!
So, I was recently having a conversation with a "friend" of mine, Hannah, when it was once again brought to my attention how truly two faced and closed minded people still are on the topic of sexuality.

It got me to thinking; with all the slashes and stories containing bisexuality, lesbianism, transgendered/transexual/transvestite characters, m-pregs and so on that there are on this site and so many others, I'm curious to know people's opinions on the issues surrouding sexual preferences. Do you believe in gay marriage? Should gay couples be able to adopt? What are the laws where you live? Do you have any interesting statistics? What are the social attitudes? Your personal views? Stats?

I know that alot of those questions are pertaining quite particularly to gay and lesbian couples, however I am also very interested to know how transexuals, transgendered people, transvestites and bisexuals are treated. What are the laws? Social attitudes? Your personal views? Statistics?

Also, has anybody got any personal stories, or stories of friends or family members or even anyone at your school or in your work place? Are there any coming out stories you would like to share? Any stories of bullying? Good or bad, if you want to share, I want to know.

Another really interesting thing I would love to be able to include is your favourite celebrities opinions on the subject. Are they supportive or not? And what are some of your favourite slash and femslash pairings? Are there any stories on this site or others than provide an interesting perspective on sexuality and the issues surrounding it?

The reason I'm asking this is because I am currently composing a ranticle (a ranting article) on the subject and I would really like some other opinions. The aim of the ranticle is to give further awareness about the topic, as well as providing peoples opinions on the matter. This journal entry will be posted on other sites under various user names that I have, and feel free to link this through your accounts on this site and others.

I really want as much information and opinions as possible as I write this, so please help me out. Thanks guys! Now, debate your little hearts out!

*Note: This has been taken from a journal on my Mibba account. If you want to read some of the comments on there then click this link: http://www.mibba.com/journals/read/295255/
jessloui
Author's Note kinda
I have also added it to my livejournal account. It can be found here: http://destroyakid.livejournal.com/551.html
Please get as many people as you can to reply to this!
KillerQueen Personally, I'm bisexual (or if you want to split hairs, you could say I'm pansexual since I really don't care about gender, male,female trans, it makes no difference to me)

I find, personally that when it comes to prejudice over sexual orientation issues, that bi's come under fire more often, I'm not saying as dangerously as perhaps gays and lesbians get it but bi's tend to get it from all sides, straights and gays alike.
Alot of Gay/Les folk say bi's are just greedy and won't have anything to do with us because they feel we are ''double agents'' or just attention seeking.
Whereas straights dislike us because we also like people of the same gender.

Then there is that stereotype about bi's being sexually promiscuous, that we can't be with one gender without sleeping with the other.

Where I live, every August we have our Pride event, and I enjoy going to it. But I do feel Bi issues are ignored quite alot.

I learned a large number of people have tried to start a petition to have the B removed from LGBT, which is quite upsetting, Of course that would never happen but to hear how some people actually want that to happen is very unsettling.

I would have expected more acceptance from the gay community since they know exactly how it feels to be treated with contempt and disrespect because of your orientation but it seems some of these people have short memories.

Of course most gays are lovely people and have no problem with it, so don't think I was insulting the entire gay community I was referring to the few who are bi-ased.

Where I live, there is a gay quater of town with many gay pubs and bars and one or 2 small clubs as well as a couple adult shops.

Out of all the bars and such I only actually really like 2, it's all to do with atmosphere for me...and yeah, and price haha.

Some of them I find are not completely welcoming to new faces- I avoid those ones.

Aside from the fact, When I am single and looking for lurrve I generally don't find much happening in my local ''scene'' as most of the places are pretty much just men inside, and the few women in there (who happen to be les/bi) are almost always already in a relationship.

I am very sorry I could not give better answers, I'm in alot of pain at the moment so can't really think too clearly- Hope I did help a little at least though =].





jessloui
KillerQueen
Thanks for your input! Sorry to hear that you're in pain, hope you get better really soon.
echeloncookie I am like KillerQueen; I am bisexual and my views are very simple: I believe same sex couples should be allowed to get married. I know a few people who are gay, lesbian or bisexual but I don't know anyone who is transgendered. I have a class with an engaged lesbian this semester.

As mentioned above, I am bisexual; I prefer men over women but it is super hard for me to find a boyfriend so I have a "part-time girlfriend" if you want to call her that.

MCRnum1fan97 oh god I can rant all day about my views on sexuality and don’t worry I’m not at all homophobic.

I'm bi-curious I like girls and guys but I don’t know if im gay or bi, but to be honest I don’t care to find out right now. I'm in a happy relationship with my girlfriend and she’s my first relationship. I’m only 15 I have my hole life ahead of me. I came out to my friends when I realised that I was interested in girls before I had a girlfriend at my shit all girls school.
at first I didn’t want anybody to know not even my family but they all accepted me, it was after i told my friends that was the issue because then i lost two friends. but then if they hate me now then they were never true friends.

how to people treat me?
well there are a lot of people I know that don’t care and don’t treat me any different. and that’s great i don’t want people to treat me any different because this is still the same me. but then you get some girls that act like they’re fine with the fact that I have a girlfriend - then you here them slagging you off behind your back. and i mean literally standing right behind me.

and i am not the type of person that would put up with that bullshit, so I’ll confront them for it then they soon shut the fuck up after an argument. I get into a lot of arguments about my sexuality/music tasted/how I look but they never take the time to get to know me. every one just judges you because they are all closes minded and if your different to the majority then you’re an outcast, weirdo, freak all that shit. But nothing will ever change me apart from me and how I feel about me.
Haha if anybody ever calls me weird (and they do a lot) I always say ‘’who wants to be normal, normal’s boring’’ its kind of become my phrase haha

Well there you go now you have my story, opinion and how I’m treated at my shit school I hope this helps you with your understanding and your article. Thank you so much for posting this I don’t really get much opportunity to actually talk about this to people at school or well anyone really most of my school is completely homophobic and my family don’t care, as for my friends I don’t hang out with them much anymore due to the face that my two old homophobic ‘friends’ still hangout with them.
So instead I hangout with my girlfriend and her friends that are now also my friends. And if I ever feel shitty for all the crap I get for my sexuality or well anything the music I listen to always brings me back to me.

Music like -
MCR - famous last words (that one always lifts me up)
BVB - never give in (such an epic song)
And a shit ton of other song and bands but this isn’t about music it’s about views on sexuality so I wont rant about music here.
XBrokenXChinaXDollsX I really Have no problem with People who are Gay/Lesbian/Bi or whatever. No matter what their Sexuality is, they are still Human. Still people. And they still have feelings.
Being Bi-Sexual Myself i get really annoyed and hurt when people make homophobic remarks. I especially hate it when my Best Freind (he's Gay.) gets death threats off almost every guy in the school.
People who treat Gay/Lesbian/Bi So on,like shit do not deserve to get treated like people them selves.
Most people who verbally abuse Gay/Lesbian/ Bi people in highschool. Usually end Up becoming Gay/Lesbian/Bi themselves.
People have a right to be who they are.
Not what others choose to see.

kisstheboy7 Hmmm... Let's see. Where do I even begin. This is my favorite topic really.

I'll start by saying that I am absolutely queer in all aspects. My gender, my orientation. Yeah. I get a lot of crap for it from my family more than anyone. They don't "believe" that it's possible to like both, or to be both, while I do. I consider myself pansexual and genderfluid. I have met very few other fluid people. It can be lonely. I have several trans* friends however and they have been extremely good for me.

My school has the largest GSA in our county and my city has the fourth largest Pride events. I think. Don't quote me on that. We have a lot of members, however, and for the most part I receive overwhelming support from the staff. I could never have done it without them.

I really regret coming out to my family. I can't lie about that. I did it as a New Years resolution because it was important to me and I wanted to reconnect with them all but while they have expressed that they are not at all surprised that I like girls, they also keep expecting me to pick sides or something.

I have been allowed to cut my hair, buy male clothing... I have not been at all acknowledged when it comes to my preferred name, pronouns or desire to attend Pride events. I have been expressly forbidden from trans* events. Apparently they are going to "convince me to hack my lady parts off".

Excuse me mom and dad but that's already something on my wishlist. They can't possibly convince me any more than I've already convinced myself.

Personally, I have found solace in fanfiction and friends that I have met on the internet with like minds. At this point in my life, not entirely on purpose, I find myself surrounded by other LGBTQIA youth and just people in general. I feel most comfortable in that community. I am not ashamed.

My favorite ever celebrity, Anthony Rapp, has inspired me more than you could imagine. He is a queer man and a musical man and I simply admire him more than words can describe. He has become my role model more than my own parents could ever be to me.

Although I have a long term boyfriend I also find myself having feelings for a close female friend... Unfortunately, this perpetuates that nasty stereotype that bisexual people are "greedy". I assure you, I am not about to cheat on my boyfriend- this is a matter of the heart, and it is FAR from below the waist. Who I love is my business and I really dislike people who judge me for it.

I am always amazed both by the support I can find in my community and also the blatant disregard. There is obviously some diversity there. While my school nurse founded our GSA ten years ago, our principal does not "believe there is a bullying problem in this school"... Um. IT'S A HIGH SCHOOL, MA'AM. YES THERE IS A BULLYING PROBLEM. And although we are a gay-friendly school (stickers on the doors and everything saying "Safe Zone" there will always be homophobes lurking about to ruin your day.

There was one girl that I remember last year who came out to her friends shortly before she moved. I believe she was making the most of the time she had left with them. I really admired her for her courage. However, one friend in particular was apparently very religious and raised in a household that taught her to hate queers. She immediately shunned her and I found myself extremely saddened by the entire thing.

Religion is religion and I don't care what you worship, but when you let it get in the way of the rest of your life, you should stop and rethink. After all, don't most religions preach to love thy neighbor?

Aside from that, there are an unfortunate number of misconceptions floating about. My own previous group of friends did not "believe" me. They believed I was attention seeking and that that was the entire point of my coming out. Why come out, they said, when you have a boyfriend already? Why not just continue to act like you're straight? But, I said, why should I have to? I am looking forward to be an LGBT activist and advocate in the future. When the gay marriage law passed in NY I was ecstatic! Next, we need to work on trans* laws.

Slowly but surely, things will get better. If you don't believe me then go visit the It Gets Better Project website.

I would like to leave on this note: gays do not destroy families, marriage or the fabric of America. (Just look at Neil Patrick Harris and his beautiful, queer family) You know what does? Prejudice. We have to all learn to love each other. All of us are human. We all make mistakes. We all love. We all cry. We have emotions, and just because someone is different doesn't mean that you should discriminate against them! Be the better man, if they've done something to you. If not, then take the high road anyways. Make a new friend. Turn your life around.

Can you queer me now?
ImNotRomeo You're all kids talking about orientation...That's amusing. In all reality, you're just curious until you have a great deal of experience with both.

Every open minded individual is bi at some point. And all bi's eventually make a choice on which orientation they prefer, usually somewhere in the mid 20s.

Granted, there are people that are straight up gay almost from birth, but those are a little rarer than mainstream would have you believe. So if you say "I'm bi" and you're a teenager you're deluding yourself. And as for so-called pan-sexuals, you're in the same category. Also known as the "go out and get some experience before talking about something you know nothing about" category.

Welcome to my opinion. Damned kids, get off my lawn!

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