Review for The Untitled Story - Year 5

The Untitled Story - Year 5

(#) twilliams1797 2008-08-26

Well, I have just read the first year and the fifth year, and I am somewhat shocked at negative ratings.. I don't understand why this is rated less than 'quite good, really' Youe storytelling is a bit odd, and I don't mean that in a bad way, it's just different.. as I read I got the impression of it being a bit 'monotone' there doesn't seem to be any really bright or dark bits, it seems to be meandering up the middle of the road, as it were.. The concept and some of your ideas are quite interesting, and not overly done elsewhere, that is to say, not cliched and overdone. It does take a bit of the 'suspension of disbelief' to accept how powerful
Harry and the others are.. but then, that IS the point of the story, how Harry uses what he has efficiently..one ting that you might consider addressing. The effect of battle and death on the combatants.. sure the wizarding world is somewhat inured to violence, because it can be repaired so easily, but seeing someone lose their life in a messy way is hard for even the most battle hardened veteran..witness the VA clinics in the US these days..if you think of it, even someone who is wilfully evil is a person..and as such should be put down, but it still ain't pretty.

Well, I am off to read the next bit year six. Enjoyed this so far.

for a good example of a terse battlefield report, read some of Clell61659 stories, Merlin's Reaper comes to mind.

Author's response

I think I'll do that. Good suggestions.