e) Local Police Chief,
d) comically brilliant but nonetheless sadistic
d) 1/16th sized replica of the Statue of Liberty, complete with lightbulb in the torch
e) gouge out my eyes with spoons and feed them to the fish in your koi pond
e) the municipal jail
d) lease co-signer
c) would have been funny if it worked
Hope you like...
Dear 1 Local Police Chief,
Words cannot begin to express how sorry I am that your 2 Car was severely damaged by my 3 Comically brilliant, but nonetheless sadistic prank. How could I have known that the 3 Zamboni I was riding in would go so far out of control?
And while it is true that I should not have pointed it in the direction of your 4 1/16th sized replica of the Statue of Liberty, complete with lightbulb in the torch, you must understand that it was all meant in fun. The subsequent carnage that I caused is beyond my ability to 5 Fathom and I must therefore humbly ask your forgiveness.
I know that you are perfectly within your rights to 6 Gouge out my cars with spoons and feed them to the fish in your Koi pond
but I ask you to remember all the good times we've had,
joshing around at 7 the municipal jail and to remember that I am first and foremost your 8 lease co-signer.
I think that counts for more than one prank, especially one that would have been funny if it worked.
(your name here)