I did like it, quite a bit. (It's too early in the morning for me to be hyper about anything, sorry.)
I think that there was emphasis on certain points that made it beautiful butARE YOU HAVING A LOVE AFFAIR EIH THE WORD BEDRAGGED (or whatever that word was...)?!? You used it like seven times in the previous chapter and a bit in this one too... For what it's worth, I think we need a new word. (Eh... Yeah.) and it's/its got a bit messy.
Eh... Sorry it's not a sunshine review, but I think you're a great author and those little mechanics improvements could make reading just that much easier, make you just that much better. (see? I'm not just a bitch it's constructive! Um... Sorry bout that.)
Well, I do really like the story and am eager to see where it goes!
Author's response
Thanks, glad you liked it (:
And yes, yes I am having a love affair with the word 'bedraggled' ;D
I think that's a bit of an exaggeration- I know I used it a couple times in the first chapter, but I did edit that. And I only used it once in this...but yeah, I get your drift- sorry!
Thanks, I do appreciate constructive criticism (: Will update soon!
CosmicZombie xo
P.S. Where were the it's/its so I can fix them? I looked through and only spotted one.