Review for Family Issue

Family Issue

(#) glazedlookineyes101 2007-04-21 06:13:24 AM

Yay! Whoohoo! Contact! Oh man, Harry is in serious trouble! How is he going to explain his way out of this?

I was actually expecting Hermione's brain to short circuit and to be speechless. Nice touch with the "Urk".

Sometimes I wish I had discovered this fic when it has been completed. I'm always anxiously waiting for the next update and it is killing me. That's one hell of a cliffhanger you left this chapter in!

Just a few little corrections if you do not mind. This sentence:

"What a beautiful baby boy," Hermione gushed, is he yours?

It should instead be:

"What a beautiful baby boy!" Hermione gushed. "Is he yours?"

This: "Oh yes," Belle cooed, he's our first, the first of many if I have my way.

Should be: "Oh yes," Belle cooed. "He's our first. He's the first of many if I have my way."

This: "I'll have to be content with our little Paul," Myrtle gushed "but isn't he the cutest thing?"

Should be: "I'll have to be content with our little Paul," Myrtle gushed. "But isn't he the cutest thing?"

Sorry about that. I just noticed them and thought you might want to know about them.

Author's response

Thanks for reading and reviewing, at first I was going to go with eloquent silence, but 'urk' won out in the end. Thanks for pointing out the punctuation omissions, (I don't know how I missed those, I'm usually so punctuational . . .) I can only say I was suffering from a bit of jet lag when I posted this, I was in Napa Valley playing tour guide for some friends from D.C. We only just got back late last night.

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