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"Can't you see I have nothing to promise, to squander, to revive? "
torn into my spine at last
nothing left but the worn silence of these shadows
the chain of vows dropped around my ankles, lost outside this wilderness-
this all enclosed tremulous night- free caught in the blades of my constancy
a passionate rising, tumescent lighting of my sorrow to bathe in
and scream- free!
I'm going to die, sleeping off the toxins of my confusion- diaphonous rages-
I refuse to be distracted
Can't you see I have nothing to promise, to squander, to revive?
So mad without even a splintering serenity left to guide me
falling, hands clasped to hold in the instant enormity of this crushing awe, this ecstasy of ruinous reflection, mouths gaped open, breathing in thin air the end and promise of our deliberation
of devasting comprehension that tears the horror from my blood and leaves me free to watch and understand
trailing my fingers around the edge of the abyss, ridges merging to create my hand and wrap my skin around in narrow pathways, voids that carve my lips open, my legs spread and waiting for a brighter dawn to burn in, ready to loose my eyes to rip it open, taken frail and shaking in the savagely infant night
so cold, I pretend my arrogance outside of time, willing new secrets to abound in furious venom from my eyes, talking omens dancing in full regale
atrocities bred and bound in my voice, latent sadisms untapped in frenzied motion
rubbing my temples as the sky collapsed
gods scowling as I nod them to oblivion, arms shaking with that barren stretch of mine so long around me
even tears are empty so prolonged
without a last glimpse of hope or torture,
I've never been so lost as now with the world spread clear before me
life boiling with paradoxes spilling over to consume my hands, running my lips full with an animal yell torwards oblivion-
for noise and music to strip me of complexities and throw me to the ground, to writhe in my own shadow
Thank you for the great blind light!
Unbreable, I crack the earth in my teeth, bury my arms in mud, leave my back as a sign to the vicious sky
and still, I cannot emerge or go deaf from silence.