um yeah i swear a lot. oh dear.
We were on a bus to avoid heaps of summer projects for school. It was either spend five months on a bus touring the country’s most important tourist sites, or get slammed with three science projects, five book reports, a geometry project and a report on the industrial revolution. Ah, the advantages to attending a private writing academy for the gifted. I don’t know how Rico got in.
“Yeah, um, him and Squash are in the back, doing each other.” Jules shouted.
We owned our bus, because we were spoiled little brats and refused to ride in the school’s pre-owned, nasty, assigned buses. Ah, the advantages to having parents who were about three-twelfths the reason the academy was still standing. Being rich is fun. We had only five students, three girls and two guys, instead of the usual eight, and we hired our own driver.
“Shut up. If he’s doing anyone it’s gonna be someone much better looking. And we all know Squash would only ever do Paradise.” Liz shouted back. It was unlike her to be defending either one of them. Though you could hardly call that defending, it was something.
“Not true. He’d probably cheat on her with Jessica Simpson if you paid him.” Jules said, walking into the kitchen.
We were the outcasts of the school, but we didn’t care. We liked not fitting in. We purposely did stuff to ensure our unpopularity.
“Who’d need paying?” Rico said, popping up from behind the kitchen counter, drawing stars in white-out on his ‘good’ school shoes.
Stuff like that. Everyone else in the school would be horrified at this act of rebellion. We called it customization and did it to everything. Hooray for non-conformity!
“Shove off, Rico,” Squash shouted from the couch.
“Oh, my Gawd you guys, Britt opened a betting poll on Alicia’s virginity.” I said, laughing as I opened my email. “Awwwwwwwww Brandon finally asked her out!” I squealed, and grabbed my skull-covered iPhone.
“Who wants to get me some Dew?” Liz asked.
“Get your own dew, lazy-ass,” I said.
“Fine…” she said. “YO JEFFS? PIT STOP TIME. We’re out of Dew!” of course, we’ve already exhausted our supplies… barely half an hour into the trip. They expect us to last five months?
“What’s with you and the Dew?” Jules asked.
Four jaws dropped and a horn beeped loudly.
“Mountain Dew is God” Liz shouted.
“Oh, my Dew how can you not love it?” I asked.
“Forget I asked, I’m not in the mood to be yelled at over a carbonated beverage.” Jules said, interrupting my rant.
“Ooh pms much?” Rico asked
“Eh. Got any extra Midol?” She retorted.
“Oh, I just ran out!” Rico said, then threw a pillow at Jules.
“We’re all pms-ing. So unless you want to see the inside of your ass, shut up!” I shouted.
“Jeff! PIT STOP, PRONTO! We’ve got four pms-ing girls and a Dew shortage!” Rico shouted.
“Hey, no more ‘Squash is a girl’ cracks. I’m not a lesbian!” I shouted at him. That must have been the twenty-third time today he’s implied that one of us was gay. I sat in Squash’s lap and kissed him.
“Get a room!” Rico shouted.
“Why, ya jealous?” I asked.
“Hells no!” he shouted.
I stood up and shook my ass at Rico. “You know you want some of this,” I said, then cracked up.
“Hey! Put that away, young lady!” Squash said, mimicking my father, then trying to catch me as I bounced away.
I laughed, and squirmed away. I walked into the bunk area, and hopped up into my bunk.