Something in Harry changes that summer between fourth and fifth year. At his trial he discovers what someone has been hiding from him since he was born.
- Good start I like the set up, the only problem I had was this little section:
"“No, Harry needed his friends weeks ago. When he was still wallowing in guilt over Cedric’s death. Did either of your children want to be his friend then, when a simple letter might have helped? Hermione didn’t either.” Sirius and Remus left the room"
Remus really doesnt have room to talk afterall he wasnt there for 13 years.
Looking out for the next chapter!
- Nice start to a Harry that seems to have brains...yeah!!! Longer would be nice, as well paragraph spacing needs to be attended too.
When Sirius went off about the kids not supporting Harry, I noticed he didn't say anything about the adults. He has an excuse but where the heck has Remus been since third year let out? He dropped Harry like a hot rock, yet alone the twelve other missing years. As well no other adult in the order wrote to support him either.
Room was cool, glad it wasn't Gryff red & gold. Hope to see more soon and discover who or what the mysterious voice belongs too.
(#) twilliams1797 2008-11-08 10:24:56 PMI won't critique the formatting of the story, I know how much of a pain Ficwad is in posting a story.
I like it, the voice speaking to Harry is intriguing and a bit worrisome.. there is a point at which you have to ask if you trust that voice or not.
the retraining of Kreacher and also Dobby, they are the opposite ends of the spectrum and you may have found a way to bring them into something like normalcy. clever.
I am always watching for a good story, this one strikes me as having a lot of potential.
my personal preferences..no slash, no R/HR..Ron is useless and does not deserve someone like Hermione, EVER.. even if she isn't with Harry.. well, you know.
it is also pathetic that I feel the need to post this factoid..