Happy eighteenth birthday son" "We love you". And that was when I realized it was all a dream.
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"Happy Birthday Gee!" Everyone yelled, my mom and dad walking in the room with a huge cake with eighteen candles on it. "Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday, dear Gerard, happy birthday to you." I blew out the candles as my mom took the picture and everybody clapped. My little brother came up to me and gave me a hug. "You're the best big brother in the world Gerard!" He said looking up at me with a huge smile on his face. Then Lindsay came and gave me a kiss. "Happy birthday baby." She said seductively with a playful smile on her lips. Then my mom and my dad came and gave me both a hug.
"We love you so much Gerard."
"You're the best son we could ever have."
"You are so much better than your brother."
"Happy eighteenth birthday son"
"We love you".
And that was when I realized it was all a dream.
Beep Beep Beep.
I opened my eyes and looked around the room, my eyes landing on the calendar. I looked at today's date and sighted. April 9. "Oh joy." I mumbled. I changed as quickly as possible into the first set of clothes I found lying on the ground, not even bothering looking at my hair in the mirror. I grabbed my bag and exited the room. As I turned around to go down the stairs, I crashed into someone.
"Hey, watch it idiot!" My little brother yelled. He gave me an evil glare and fixed his hair, like if crashing into me had messed it up. I just mumbled a sorry and followed him down the stairs. I was going to go in the kitchen but regretted it when I heard the screams.
"Ah, they woke up early." I thought.
"Fuck you whore! You really want me to believe you were not at his place screwing him around? I know you cheat on me! And you still dare to come back?!" My dad yelled, followed by the sound of a plate crashing.
"Of Course I wasn't with another man! I was just at the store! I would never cheat on you! I love you!" My mom yelled desperately crying harder.
"Fucking whore." My dad left the kitchen and passed besides me.
"Hi dad." Mikey told my dad as he passed by. How could he see all the shit our father did and still talk to him? Because my brother was an asshole.
I thought if I didn't say something he might get angry at me, so I softly spoke. "Hi dad."
At the sound of my voice he turned around abruptly and lunged at me, grabbing me by the collar of the shirt.
"DId you just say something? You never ever direct a single word to me! You understand! You are not worthy of speaking to me! You should be more like your brother! What did I ever do to deserve such a faggot for a son!" He threw me against the wall and turned to my brother. "You can have the car today son." He handed him the keys, and with that, he exited the room.
"Ha-ha. Fag. Good luck getting to school early" Mikey said kneeling in front of me and shaking the car keys in my face. He was about to go out the door, when he turned around. "Oh, and by the way, Happy Birthday." He said sarcastically with an evil smirk and slammed the door.
I sighted and carefully stood up. I didn't want to go into the kitchen. I was too scared of what I would see. Specially because I knew what to expect. I just grabbed my bag and left.
I sat at the end of the bus looking out the window. Why can't I have a normal family?
The bus came to a stop and I got down, the sunlight hitting my face and I groaned at it. I hate the sun. I walked into the building which I actually considered a prison and headed towards my locker. I was about to get to it, when two extremely tall jocks stood in front of me.
"Hey Way. We heard today is your birthday." Jensen smirked.
"Yeah, and we wanted to give you your present, you know, for being such a good friend." Jeremy said.
Suddenly Jensen punched my stomach, and when I was holding it Jeremy kicked me in the crotch. I was without breath. As I laid on the cold floor, both jocks kicked me wherever they could. Suddenly one of them kicked my head and it smashed into the locker I was laying besides.
"Have fun on your birthday Way" Jeremy and Jensen left, while laughing.
I got up and touched my head. There was no signs that my head, or any part of my body was bleeding. I didn't know how that could be, but I was lucky for that. My body ached and my crotch hurt, but I ignored the pain. I had learned to ignore it a long time ago, when all the abuse started.
Instead of going to my locker, I decided to search for my girlfriend Lindsay. I found her in front of her locker, talking to her best friend Jamia. I didn't have anything against Jamia, but she was not the type of girl I would talk to, less be friends with.
"Hi Lindsay." I said rather sheepishly. I loved her and all, but lately we had been having some trouble. Stuff about me not treating her like I used to, her hanging out with her friends rather than me and leaving me aside, yeah, stuff like that. But I seriously still loved her. She turned around and gave me a semi-annoyed expression.
"Hi Gerard. Happy Birthday." She said with no emotion, then turned back to Jamia. What the fuck had that been? Was this like those things you see on TV where your friends seem to ignore you or forget your birthday and later they throw an amazing surprise party? If that was so, I preferred it to be now.
"Uhh, Lindsay?" She turned around, again, with her annoyed expresion. "Yes Gerard?"
"If there is going to be a surprise party, can it be now? I kinda hate surprises, you know it." She stared at me like I was crazy, then turned to look at Jamia who gave her an "I don't know" expression.
"Gerard, there is no surprise party. And even if there was, think of how pathetic it would be. You don't have any friends. It would be just me and your asshole of a brother, and that only if someone paid him. Like I said, pathetic." She turned once more to talk to Jamia.
I don't know what happened to her. She used to be the most amazing human being on earth. When I met her, every day she would tell me how much she loved me, and she would encourage me saying that one day I would me a great comic book author. Now she was probably worse than Mikey. I wondered what made her change.
Then I saw the reason. McCraken.
"Gotta go. Bye!" Lindsay said to Jamia and I saw her run across the hallway into the arms of some guy. That guy being Bert McCraken. I saw her hug her, but made signs to him to wait for her, to which he simply nodded. She ran back to me with a smile.
"Gerard, I am going to be sincere with you. I've been seeing Berth lately. I love him, and not you anymore. We're over." And just like that she was gone back to the arms of that idiot. I was dumbstruck. How could she do this? But then, it all started to make sense. She had become so unattached because of him. Suddenly I felt huge fury against him, and I slammed my fist into a locker. Not a very good idea, my knuckles started bleeding.
I tried to gorget the whole Lindsay- Bert incident and headed to class. Although all day I had the same thought in my head. I was completely alone in the world now. I fooled myself all this time thinking that Lindsay really did love me, but she was probably just dating me because she was bored.
I was going to head home after the bell rang, but I didn't feel like dealing with the screaming. Instead I walked to the park near the school and sat on a swing. His swing. The swing he loved to sit on, to watch the sky.
Then I remembered, how it felt when somebody did care. When I still had my best friend with me. The only friend I've had. Way back, before Mikey became an asshole, before I was introduced to high school, back when my mom and dad actually acted like concerned parents, back when he was alive.
I was nine years old.
The sky was cloudy, only letting small beams of light in, but we didn't care. We liked it that way.
Frankie sat on the swing as I pushed him, and Mikey sat on the sandbox in front of us building a sand castle.
"Gee, Frankie, come help me!" Mikey yelled trying but failing at keeping a little stick standing still on top of a little bundle of sand he called a tower. Frankie jumped off the swing and I followed. We sat on the edge of the sandbox and helped Mikey gather the sand into the little bucket he had.
We spent there the whole afternoon, but at the end we had a big amazing sandcastle, which even included little windows made with a plastic spoon we found lying on the ground. It had two towers, and even a bridge that actually was a piece of wood.
We stood up and dusted the sand off our pants, and we admired our work.
"It is so amazing! Thank you so much Gee!" Mikey exclaimed and gave me a hug.
"Thank you Frankie. You guys are the best!" He gave Frankie a hug too. We were so hypnotized by it's greatness, that we didn't notice our mom coming.
"Wow, did you boys do that? That is beautiful!" My mom exclaimed and bend down to hug me and my brother, and patted Frankie on the head.
"Do you want a picture of it?" She asked, and we excitedly nodded.
We gathered around our sandcastle, careful not to step on it, and showed toothy smiles at my mom.
"Okay, one, two, three!" Click. And we saw the camera flash.
"Alright kids, it's time to go." My mom said. We looked back at our castle with melancholy, and walked slowly to my mom.
"Do you want a ride home Frankie?" She asked him.
"No thanks, MIss Way, I'll walk." He said with a smile.
"Are you sure?" Mom asked concerned.
"Sure. I live across the street." Frankie answered with a sweet smile.
"Okay then, but be careful." My mom said in a maternal tone, to which Frankie nodded.
"Bye Gee, bye Mikey!" He said giving us high fives.
"By Frankie! See you tomorrow!" Mikey and me yelled as we walked to our car. We got in and rode off, happy that at least I got to spend the next day with my best friend.
By the time I was done walking down memory lane, the sky had become darker and the sun began to set. I sighted and got off the swing. I started walking towards my house, ignoring the stares people gave me when they passed by me. "Look, a freak!" Some teenagers yelled as they walked by me. I just kept my head low. People on the street loved to make fun of the kid with completely black clothing, black eyeliner, and extremely messy hair. But I had gotten used to it.
I was walking looking at the floor, and was crossing the street, when I heard a car honk, and the sound of tires screeching.
I looked up to see a red truck had stopped inches in front of me, and the middle-aged driver sticking his head out the window.
"Hey kid, what are you doing? Trying to get yourself killed?!" The man with gray hair yelled annoyingly, then driving off.
But seeing the car there, stopped in front of me, made me ask myself why. Why did this man stop in front of me? What happened to make this man notice me? Why couldn't the person who was driving that night stopped just like this man did? Why did that person not see Frankie like this man saw me?
The memories of that terrible event came flooding into my mind. I wanted it to stop, but I couldn't. I was flashed with all those terrible images I tried so hard to forget.
Frankie and me playing video games being fifteen years old. Frankie and me having a discussion over some chick. Frankie storming out of my house after our discussion. The knock on the door at midnight that night. Frankie's mom at the door. Frankie's mom crying. My mom crying. Both explaining to me how the car ran over my best friend while running in the street,running from me. Mikey screaming with tears cascading from his eyes yelling at me how it was all my fault. The funeral, the last time I saw him, in his coffin. The men placing his closed coffin six feet under the ground. The men covering it with sand. His mom handing me the picture of us together, next to the sandcastle.
I held my head in my hands and dropped myself on the sidewalk, crying. I had tried so hard to suppress that, hence why I drank, to forget about the one person that made me feel someone on this planet. After I calmed myself, I gathered the courage to walk home.
I opened the door, and immediately heard exactly what I expected to hear.
"You whore!" My dad yelled dragging my mom by the hair into the kitchen. I quietly walked towards the door of the kitchen, and stood outside listening.
"Bitch! Do you really think you can get away with it?! Think that I am not going to find out?! Well, I know all your fucking tricks bitch!" I quietly came into the kitchen and stood next to the door watching in horror as my dad pulled my mom's hair hard and made her face smash into the dining table. She slowly lifted her head, her face now with purple marks, a bleeding nose, and one eye purple, the other black. Blood was running down from her lips, and her blonde hair was a complete mess.
My dad let go of her and walked away, heading my way. I flinched when he passed by, thinking that he was going to do something to me, but he just exited the kitchen.
My mom ran a hand through her hair, and started putting away plates and cups that had been left to dry. I felt so bad for her at the moment I blurted out my thoughts.
"Mom, you don't need that son of a bitch. He is just a stupid fuck who doesn't know how to treat a woman right. You don't need him. You, we can run away buy a house in a far away city, and-" She turned around to look at me. "What did you just say?" She asked totally calm, lowering her right hand which was holding a plate.
"I think you should leave him. We don't need him in our lives." I said slowly.
I saw her expression turn into pure fury. "You stupid son of a bitch! Don't ever say that! Your father does all those things because he loves me!" She screamed, backing me against the wall, and smashing the plate in my head. I saw the plate fall into pieces from my head.
She didn't even look at me, she just walked out, leaving me alone, my head aching, and my soul feeling empty.
Happy birthday Gerard. Happy. Fucking. Birthday.