"And if you could not accept my love, then you could not accept anyone’s."
I suppose you could tell me that my sanity had escaped me. That conclusion would be incorrect, for I chased it away. You might say that I could gain it back as easily as I released it. But I would never consider doing such a thing because I’ve experienced it all; and once you’ve lived through insanity, there’s no going back.
But I cannot be fully blamed, for you can be held partly responsible. You made the decision that caused me to release my sane mind after it had been locked away, never permitted parole. You chose your own fate. If you had only accepted my love then none of this would have ever occurred. I didn’t want to have to resort to this, but you could never love me like I loved you. And if you could not accept my love, then you could not accept anyone’s. So my sanity fled and I fulfilled your destiny.
I loved how your breathing was heavy as you sank into the corner of the dreary hotel room. I loved how your face was drained of color, making your hazel eyes more prominent. Though your eyes conveyed fear, I was satisfied that you were finally focusing your sight on me. Your body trembled as I inched closer to you. I slid my palm down your cheek, feeling the softness of your angelic face. You cringed at my touch. I brought my face closer to yours and I could feel your warm breath on my skin. My lips found their way to your neck and I began to kiss you. I started out slow and soft, but it was difficult to control myself. The once delicate kisses became rough and passionate. And as I started to enjoy myself, you exposed more of your neck to me. I took full advantage of this before moving down to your collarbone. I started tugging at the hem of your shirt before I realized that I was becoming sidetracked from my original intent.
I reached into my back pocket and pulled out a razor blade. I took hold of your wrist and I was about to place it on your skin before you grasped my hair and drew me in close. Your lips pressed against mine in a hurried, panicked fashion. I knew that you were attempting to distract me but I decided to enjoy you while I was able to. Your grip on my hair tightened as I pressed my body up against yours. I wrapped my arm around your waist to assure that we were as close as possible. I heard you moan but I doubted that you were enjoying any of this. I could feel your tongue battling mine for dominance inside of my mouth. You looked vulnerable; I was loving every second of it.
I was unsure of how far I should take it. Part of me desired that I should continue. After all, I had wanted this for quite some time. But another part told me to end it all at that moment. I had come here for one purpose, and that purpose needed to be fulfilled. In the end, my logic won so I grabbed your wrist and placed the blade on it.
Your body trembled harder as I began to cut away your skin. Soon, blood covered the blade and was flowing out of your wrist. Still, I continued to cut you. Your eyelids began drooping and your breathing slowed.
I placed the blooded blade in your hand and watched your body fall into the puddle of red. I then kissed your lips and whispered my goodbye.