Past Gerard gets a wake up call, Mikey has some news and Chey's not thrilled about the idea of a new baby.
Frank was fuming he threw the paper and pen down on the bed and went in search of his band mate. As he walked through the halls of the hotel he rehearsed what he was going to say, went over the words he would use to show just how angry he was.
‘Hey Frank’ Mikey said as he walked to his room, he noticed his friends tense posture and set jaw ‘what’s up?’
‘Where’s your brother?’
‘Where else would he be?’ Mikey sighed sadly ‘he’s at the bar of course.’
‘Son of a bitch’ Frank hissed storming off towards the bar, Mikey called after him but Frank ignored him and picked up his pace.
‘Put the drink down’ Frank demanded quietly he had walked into the dimly lit bar area of the hotel. He spotted Gerard immediately, it wasn’t difficult. The semi-full room held happy couples and small groups of people sharing intimate conversations and jokes, a pianist playing an unfamiliar upbeat melody and then it had the dark figure of Gerard Way in the corner.
‘I haven’t finished my drink’ Gerard said his red eyes meeting Frank’s, he smiled despite the look of disgust on his friends face.
‘I ain’t asking I’m telling’ Frank said snatching the whiskey filled tumbler from the table.
‘What the fuck are you doing?’ Gerard growled ‘what’s your God damn problem?’
‘You’re my problem’ Frank hissed slamming the photo he was carrying in his hands onto the table, he grabbed the back of Gerard’s head and forced his face as close to the picture as possible. ‘You see that?’ he said releasing his hold on Gerard ‘that is your baby, that is a sonogram of your son or your daughter and while Cheyenne is in Jersey walking around with a huge stomach and contractions, you’re sitting in here drinking away your life and your chance of being a father.’
‘How did you get this? When did you…’ Gerard stammered his eyes wide as he looked at the image of a foetus.
‘What does it matter?’ Frank said ‘I’m the only man taking care of her, I’m doing your fucking job, you’re suppose to be doing what I’m doing and I swear to God if you ever stress her out like that again I’ll rip your fucking head off. Got it? Sort your fucking life out or so help me I’ll keep you away from that baby myself.’
‘This is my baby?’ Gerard asked bewildered. The alcohol in his system was making his head spin but it didn’t stop him from understanding what he held in his hands
‘Not for long’ Frank retorted slamming the glass back down on the table along with Gerard’s phone and storming off.
‘I need a drink’ Gerard told the lady behind the counter, she had a kind face and the reddest hair he’d ever seen.
‘What can I get you?’ she asked politely choosing not to notice his ragged appearance and the fact that he was leaning heavily on the counter for support.
‘I need coffee’ he slurred ‘lots of coffee’
‘Then you’ve come to the right place’ she joked making him smile.
‘That’s why I love Starbucks’ he admitted swaying slightly ‘I’ll take an espresso and a black Americano’
‘Sure take a seat I’ll bring it over’ she said making a note to herself to throw in a free muffin, he looked like he needed some food.
An hour later he had sobered up considerably he started at the photo, turning it around in his hands, studying the different angles trying to see if he could suss whether it was a boy or a girl, of course he couldn’t but he didn’t care, he’d be happy as long as the baby was healthy. Having the picture in front of him suddenly made it so real. His baby was in front of him, he could see the shape of its head, its nose, one of its arms and in a matter of weeks it would be born all soft and pink and new. It was a few seconds before he realised he was crying, silent tears were running down his face, falling onto the table. He wanted to be there, he wanted to hold Cheyenne’s hand whilst she pushed their child into the world, he wanted to be there to hear the baby’s first cry he wanted to announce to his friends that he had a son or a daughter. It was his right and he wouldn’t give it up.
‘Cheyenne it’s me I’m so sorry about the way I spoke to you earlier I didn’t mean to cause you or the baby any distress. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, I mean I do know and I’m sorry. I promise you I’m going to try harder, I know I said that before but I swear to God I mean it this time, Frank showed me the sonogram of the baby…’
Gerard cursed as the answer machine message cut out, he dialled again and waited
‘Sorry the machine cut me off. Where was I? Oh yeah the sonogram it’s the most awesome thing I’ve ever seen. From this moment on I’m going to be everything you need Chey, let me help you, let me do the things father’s are supposed to do, I just want to be there for our baby and for you. Please give me another chance to show you that I can do this, I’m ready now. I’m ready to be a father.’
Present September 2012
‘She’s asleep’ Bob announced ‘out for the count’
‘Thanks for doing that Bob’ Gerard said as he collapsed on the sofa next to Cheyenne.
‘No problem I’m her uncle it’s my job’ he replied proudly ‘Just call me super Bob.’
‘Can I just say as much fun as that party was, we are never doing that again’ Cheyenne said tiredly ‘that was too much even for me.’
‘Amen to that’ Jamia agreed ‘kids are a handful and my God are they messy’
‘But you already knew that’ Christa laughed ‘what are you going to do when the next one comes along, not throw them birthday parties?’
‘What next one?’ Cheyenne cried ‘There’s no next one, one is enough.’
‘No way’ Gerard said ‘we can’t just have one what about our little baby boy?’
‘What little baby boy?’ Cheyenne exclaimed ‘you must be out of your mind if you think I’m dong this all over again from the beginning, no way. It was hard enough the first time round.’
‘It’ll be different this time’ Gerard said seriously ‘it’ll be easier’
‘Not happening, the next baby to come along is coming from Jamia, Alicia or Christa, but it certainly isn’t coming from me.’
‘We’ll see’ Gerard said smugly placing his hand on her stomach ‘I’ve got a feeling we’ll be trying for one tonight.’
A chorus or ooh’s and laughter broke out into the room, Cheyenne shook her head wildly, she caught Frank’s eye and noticed he wasn’t smiling, she quickly averted her gaze feeling herself blush under his stare.
‘Well since we’re on the subject of children’ Ray said clearing his throat ‘we were going to wait till next week to tell you but there’s no time like the present so here goes. Christa and I are having a baby she’s nearly three months pregnant.’
‘What?’ Cheyenne squealed
‘Oh my God congratulations!’ Alicia screamed both women getting up and flying over to Christa enveloping her in a hug.
‘Thanks I’m so excited’ she admitted her face alight with happiness
‘Well done Ray' Gerard said patting his band mate on the back ‘that’s excellent news. Oh my gosh I’m going to be an uncle twice.’
‘Its not as great as it sounds trust me' Bob joked
‘Congrats’ Jamia said quietly hugging Christa tightly, she took a deep breath but could feel herself choking up.
‘Don’t worry’ Alicia whispered to her ‘it’s your turn next Mia’
‘I hope so’ Jamia said putting her hand on her friend’s stomach smiling through the tears forming in her eyes. ‘I really really hope so.’
‘So right now our baby is upside down in the womb and laying on fat stores.’
‘How do you know all of this?’ Cheyenne asked in amazement
‘I’ve been reading about it’ Gerard confessed as he exhaled a long line of smoke ‘I really am trying.’
‘I see and just so you know at the precise moment the baby is also kicking the heck out of me’ Cheyenne laughed
‘I’m so bummed I’m missing all of this’ Gerard sighed, falling further back onto his bed.
‘The downfall of being a rock star.’
‘It’s a big downfall’ he admitted ‘I’m thinking of pulling a sicky’
‘Don’t you dare’ Cheyenne gasped ‘you can’t do that to your fans.’
‘Frank has’ Gerard replied ‘he’s back in Jersey.’
‘But he’s actually sick, he’s not pretending.’ She told him.
‘I suppose’ Gerard said sulking ‘Have you seen him?’
‘No’ she said ‘he’s sick so I doubt we’ll be crossing paths anytime soon it’s probably not the best idea. Listen Gee, I have to go I’ve got work tomorrow.’
‘You’re still working? Don’t you think you should be taking it easy?’
‘I’ve only got two weeks left before I take leave I’ll be fine.’
‘If you say so’ he said with a shrug ‘be careful’
‘I will be. Bye Gee.’
‘Liar Liar pants on fire’ Frank sang, his hand rubbing her bump, he pressed lightly looking for the baby.
‘What was I supposed to say I couldn’t tell him that you were here singing to the baby, he’d get jealous? He’s doing well at the moment he’s been three weeks without a drink I would hate for him to relapse.’
‘You’re right, me too’ Frank said ‘he really is trying.’
‘Only because of you’ Cheyenne said ‘I mean I’m glad he’s sorting himself out but that’s only because you showed him the sonogram.’
‘Not true he changed because he wanted to and because he knows what he’s risking.’ Frank said ‘He lost you once Chey, I doubt he’d be stupid enough to lose you again or the baby.’
‘Hmm, well as nice as that sounds I’m not going to hold my breath’ Cheyenne said ‘I’m glad he’s on the road to recovery but its still early days.’
‘Have some faith Chey’ Frank replied
‘I did’ she said her hand stroking her wide stomach ‘and he left me down.’
‘We all make mistakes, we’ve made them’ he said softly ‘we’re not innocent.’
‘Its true but I wouldn’t have been unfaithful if he hadn’t hurt me, if he never slept with Lyn I wouldn’t have slept with you Frank and you know that.’
‘But we kissed’ he reminded her and smiled as the baby kicked his hand gently.
‘Yeah and we stopped. Knowing he was unfaithful pushed me over the edge and into your lap.’ She said with a smile ‘he started it’
Frank laughed and shook his head ‘Two wrongs don’t make a right’
‘Stop being a know-it-all’ Cheyenne said rolling her eyes. ‘It’s unattractive.’
‘And so is being a liar.’ Frank retorted
‘Speaking of liars, where does Jamia think you are?’ Cheyenne shot back.
‘She thinks I’m at home, sick’ he said not meeting her eye.
‘Ah, now who’s the liar?’
‘Well if I didn’t lie I wouldn’t be here right now and you’d be all alone, pinning for me.’ He said standing up to stretch his limbs. He had been cuddled up on the sofa with Cheyenne for at least an hour and his joints were beginning to stiffen.
‘I wouldn’t be pinning for you’ Cheyenne laughed ‘you’re deluded’
‘You’ve missed me’ Frank said leaning over her, his hands resting on the top of the sofa, his body towering over hers ‘admit it, when you opened the door to me you were over the moon.’
‘That’s true’ Cheyenne said blushing at the intimacy ‘but…’
‘I’ve missed you to’ Frank said ‘which is why I’m coming back tomorrow to see you and the baby.’
‘You are?’ Cheyenne said smiling brightly, it was nice to still have him around, he was the only one really supporting her though her pregnancy.
‘Sure why not? Jamia’s off to see her grandmother I’m too “sick” to go with so I might as well come and jam with you.’
‘I’ve got work, you know’
‘So I’ll meet you for lunch or something.’ He said with a shrug
‘Sounds like a plan.’ She said holding out her hands for him to help her up.
‘Stay where you are’ he told her bending down to kiss the tip off her nose he rubbed his hand over her stomach and smiled. ‘I’ll see myself out.’
‘Thanks I’ll see you tomorrow’ Cheyenne said not sure if the butterflies in her stomach were caused by the baby or Frank.
‘Laters Chey, laters baby.’ He called out before he closed the door behind him.
Present September 2012
‘Goodnight Gee’ Cheyenne yawned tiredly. They lay together in bed, the lights off he curtains open so the moon shone through the window casting a dim light into the room.
‘Chey can I ask you something?’ Gerard asked he had been quiet sicne the others had left for the night, barely sayig two words as he got undressed for bed.
‘Did you mean what you said earlier about not having more children?’
‘Yeah’ she said pulling the covers up over her shoulder.
‘What, ever?’ he asked
‘No not ever I just mean at the moment, I don’t think I can go through that again so soon.’
‘It’s not soon though Jasmine is five. I think it’s about time she had a baby brother or sister.’
‘She’s fine as she is’ Cheyenne said ryign not to get annoyed by the topic ‘I think she likes being the centre of attention, plus Mikey and Alicia are going to pop one out in six months, she’ll have a cousin to play with then.’
‘Why don’t you want to have another baby with me?’ he asked quietly. He had a feeling that it wasn’t that she didn’t want to have them but it was because she didn’t want to have them with him.
‘Because to be blatantly honest you fucked me over big time the last time around and I don’t think I can face doing that again. I just couldn’t.’
‘It wouldn’t be the same’ he told her propping himself up on his elbows ‘I’m not the same. I’d support you this time.’
‘You said that to me the last time, you said that you were ready to be a father you said you’d be there for both of us and you weren’t.’ she reminded him trying to keep the anger that she felt out of her voice, the last things he wanted was an argument there was nothing worse then going to bed mad.
‘I know I let you down but I’m here for you now aren’t I? I do everything you ask of me and more.’ He told her laying back down
‘Yeah now you’re here when she’s a little person and it’s easy. But where were you when Jasmine was sick, when her nose was blocked and she couldn’t breathe so she couldn’t feed. Or when she was teething, or when she woke up three or four times a night. Where were you when I was crying myself to sleep because I couldn’t cope, when I had to drop her off at day-care and go back to work because I couldn’t take her to your mothers because you were always there, drunk and I was scared to leave her? Those are the things I remember from being pregnant and having Jasmine so forgive me if I’m not ready to jump back in and start again.’
‘But those are all the reason why I’m desperate to have another baby and I use the word desperate because I am Chey. I missed out on everything, good and bad I hate that I missed her first words and her first step that I missed the first time she had a bath or the first time you took her to the movies. I missed it all and it eats me up inside to know that I’ll never get that back with Jasmine but I have to know that at some point, sooner rather then later that I’ll get to experience it for myself. I’m not asking that we have one right now, I’m just asking that you’ll consider it and maybe we’ll try for one next year. I just want the chance to be the dad I know I can be.’
Cheyenne didn’t respond. She lay next to him letting his words sink in. He was right Jasmine should have a sibling to grow up with and Gerard should get another chance to be a father but every time she thought about a new baby she’s remembered how hard it was the first time round and it always made her feel sick. Of course he was right. Gerard was an excellent Father to Jasmine now, he had nothing but time for her but two children would always be harder to manage then one, and his career was as on fire and busy as it ever was, it would be so stressful to have another baby and Gerard wasn’t so good at handling stress, he handled it with a drink, which was what made the first time round the nightmare that it was.
‘Gerard I want you to hear me loud and clear. I am not promising anything but I will think about the idea of having another baby.’ She said turning to face him, she reached out and touched his face she could just make out his features in the darkness.
‘Thank you Chey, that’s all I ask’ he said turning on his side and pulling her into his arms ‘I know you’ve heard this from me before but I promise I won’t disappoint you.’
‘I hope you don’t’ she said looking into his eyes. ‘Coz I don’t think I could handle it.’
‘I won’t’ he whispered kissing her lips ‘you and Jasmine are my life and our life will be good from here on out, I know that for sure.’
‘Let me guess?’ Marcus said as he walked into his bedroom and spotted Lyn curled upon the bed in the foetal position. He took off his watch and placed it on the dressing table before joining her on their king-sized bed he moulded his body into hers and kissed her hair. ‘You’ve had the conversation again haven’t you?’
‘Yeah’ Lyn said as she wiped her nose on the scrunched up tissue ‘I don’t know why but it doesn’t get any easier.’
‘Why would it?’ he asked stroking her head ‘it’s a difficult thing as it is and you know where I stand on it. I still think it was a mistake to let the cat out of the bag to begin with.’
‘Well what was I supposed to do? Lie? It wasn’t like I had a choice she already knew and it would’ve been terrible to lie to her.’
‘Sometimes it better to have a pretty lie then an ugly truth.’ Marcus said honestly.
‘I know’ Lyn said ‘I know.’
‘What do we do now?’ Marcus asked studying his wife’s tear stained face, even after five years of marriage he still thought his wife was as beautiful now as she was then.
‘We have to go back to Jersey’ Lyn said fresh tears running down her face.
‘What?’ Marcus cried his body tensing against hers ‘You’ve got to be kidding’
‘We have to’ Lyn said with a heavy sigh ‘Paige wants to meet her father.’
A/N Hello all. OMG I know! Shock shock horror. I hope you're all well. How was that for you? Hope you liked it let me know. Big thanx to all the lovely reviews and the ratings, I love them all as you know. Take care xxx