3 months later
The end of the school dance was rolling around, and, yeah. It was a big deal.
And when I say big deal, I’m talking, BIG ASS DEAL. Like, people get limos and spend $3482039487 bijillion dollars on shoes and get boob jobs. They don’t mess around here.
“... Yeah, so my dress is purple, and its strapless, and its an empire waste, and its puffy and stuffs.” Caro described, moving her arms around while doing so. That’s all I heard for the past week, just strictly about dates and apparel. I honestly couldn’t give a shit about the dance, but I knew I would get sucked into going some way or another.
“That’s amazing. ” Gerard said, inspecting his half eaten carrot, not paying attention to anything she had said.
“Yo, we should match.” Caro said, nudging William. “Ahaha, no. We really shouldn’t.” William chuckled, scooting farther away from her.
“Oh common, we should. I’d really like it if you would.” She persuaded, batting her eye lashes.
“Yeah, I’m sure you would, but I’m dressing the way I wanna dress, and I’m sorry if it clashes with your plans.” He said, not sounding sorry... At all.
“Yeah, it does, thank you very much.” She pouted, sticking out her lower lip dramatically.
“William, I think you hurteded her feelings.” Ryan state, in a childish tone.
“Yeah, you keep on talking like that, you’re gonna be dateless...” David trailed off.
To be quite honest, I never liked David. He had no personality. He was another one of those sweet and innocent straight edge kids. Plus, I don’t even know how this happened, but he stole Hagen from me.
It was the oddest thing. One day, everything me and Hagen had, was no longer there (I am sorry. I had to do that. THIS IS MY STORY AND I WILL QUOTE THAT SONG AS MANY TIMES AS I WANT TO). And thats as literal as it gets. Its because of David too. David came in there and was all charming, and when I get jealous, I get jealous, and its awkward for everybody around me. So we just back away from each other, figuratively. You know what I mean, we just started getting awkward and stop talking, and just kind of ignored each other. Not in a ‘I’m ignoring you because I’m mad at you’ type of way, but more in a ‘I’m ignoring you, but I’m gonna be nice to you, because you didn’t really do anything wrong, but you didn’t do anything right either’ type of way. Yeah, it’s complicated. But, long story short, we just totally blew off our ‘date’. Honestly, after David became part of Medical Plaza, and he got all up in her grill, we kinda stopped talking about our relationship. She honestly doesn’t seem phased at all by it, but what would I know? I’m a guy.
Nonetheless, David asked Hagen to the dance, and Hagen said yes.... of course. William’s going with Caro. Gerard is going with Lindsey Balto, but everybody just called her Lyn-Z. Mike refused to go to the dance, and frankly, a guy like Mike, you can’t force him to do anything, because you just don’t mess with a guy like Mike. Kyle, Paige and Oli decided that they were just gonna be a threesome. And they worded it that way just to see your reaction. Kyle and Oli had no desire to ask any girls because there’s nobody to ask, and Paige had gotten asked, but she had said how she’d rather be hanging with Kyle and Oli. Ryan had asked Lacy Mosley, the new girl. Quiet girl, short, long black hair, pale, dark eyes, had this whole mysterious vibe to her. Plus she was a screamer, you can’t get any better than that. Spencer had expressed is unenthusiasm for asking a girl, and his pure dislike for Lacy. And for myself, there was nobody worth asking.
See, just by knowing who’s going with who, I can tell you how the night’s gonna end.
Caro will end up pregnant. David and Hagen will end up running away. Gerard will end up being a groom. Mike will be, well, at home. Kyle, Paige and Oli will be somewhere in down town Las Vegas partying, sloppy drunk, half naked, possibly with lost virginity’s. Ryan will end up, I don’t know, with a girlfriend if he’s lucky. And me and Spencer will watching from the side lines, while the city sleeps in flames ( QUICK! NAME THE ARTIST THE CD COMES FROM! NOW! NO GOOGLING IT PEOPLE! ) It’s probably gonna end up like that. Yup yup. I’m that good.
Just then, Ryan came running from the enterence of the cafeteria, towards us, frantically.
He stopped when he got to our table, and jumped up and down excitedly, holding in a smile.
“Guess what?” He asked, barely composing himself.
“You really have to pee, but just wanted to share first?” Gerard smirked.
“No, shut up. So I was in Mrs. Robinson’s class last period, and since she’s head of the dance/homecoming/all that jazz comity, I overheard her talking about what music she wants to get for the dance. She was on the phone saying how all the DJ’s were booked and stuff, and she was in denial. So after class, I was all ‘I could totally help you out with the whole music for the dance thing’ and she was all ‘REALLY?!’ and I was all “REALLY’ and yeah. So basically, I told her we’d, being Panic at the Disco, would perform.” Ryan smiled. There were a chorus of groans.
“Ryan, haven’t you guys given up on that dream yet, considering its not working out... at all?” Caro whined, putting her head, sideways, on the table, covering her arms with it.
“Nope. Look, there are just so many great opportunities now that schools, kinda sorta, coming to an end, why quit now?” Ryan defended, keeping his tone of optimism.
She shrugged, picking at her nail beds.
“So yeah. Just one problem... We need a bass player.” Ryan said, and he slowly started staring at Paige.
She finally looked up, confused, and frankly, scared.
“What do you want from me?” She asked, covering her eyes with her hands.
“Can you do me, well Spencer and Brendon too, a HUGE FAVOR?” He asked, emphasis on the word huge.
She sighed, putting her hands on her hips, “What’s the deal?”
“We need you to fill in for Brent.” Ryan mumbled quickly.
“Yeah, whatever, sure. I’ll do it.” She shrugged.
“REALLY?!” He asked, eyes wide.
“Yes, really. Now stop bothering me, I’m trying to eat.” He rolled his eyes, and took a seat, “So what’s up?”, Ryan asked.
“William refuses to match with me for the dance.” Caro repeated, pouting dramatically, again.
“Awww,” he mocked sorry for her, “I’m so sorry. Ahaha, I’ll be your date. We can match, you’ll wear purple, I’ll wear purple. It’ll be snazzy.” He winked, then chuckled, pulling out an apple form his bag and munching on it.
Caro’s eyes bit up, smiling at the thought. “Ahahha, really?!” She asked, giggling. “Really really.” He smiled a warm smile.
Her eyes started to melt, I’m not sure if it was at the thought, or just Ryan in general. Then again, what would I know about girls?
“Ahaha, be careful Beckett, he may steal your date. I’d go with the whole matching, purple- purple thing.” Kyle advised, jokingly.
“Hey, I’ll think about it, if it makes you happy.” William softened up *(and no, that’s not what she said))
“It does make me happy, ya know.” She smirked.
“Well, you being happy, does make me happy.” William sentimentally said.
“Awwwww.” Caro blushed, giving him a kiss on the cheek.
“YEAH. THAT’S FREAKING ADORABLE. WHY DON’T YOU TWO GO BE ALL CUTE AND COUPLY LIKE AWAY FROM US SINGLE PEOPLE FOR A CHANGE.” Paige yelled, throwing a crescent at them, hitting Caro’s nose and Beckett’s cheek. Caro pulled away immediately.
“Look. You actually hit the people this time.” Hagen chuckled. Paige and Oli suddenly broke out in laughter.
Yet another inside joke I’m not gonna ask about.
“You’re just jealous.” Caro smirked.
“At least I wasn’t jealous enough to steal- know what I’m not even gonna go there, I’m not even gonna go there.” Paige took back her words. Fortunately, William and Caro were caught up too much in their little worlds to even guess what she was going to say, which is good because we don’t wanna bring up the whole incident from 3 months ago and start table war No. 2938470.
Soon enough the belle rang for 4th period, and we got our happy butts up for English. Everybody had been sitting in the same seats for the whole year. That class was the easiest class I had ever taken because all you did was sit on your ass, talk amongst yourself, and turn in spark notes.
Me, Hagen, Paige and Kyle sat in our usual corner. Nobody ever bothered us. It was nice. “So how do you feel about playing with Panic at the Disco again?” Kyle asked me once class begun. “Well honestly, I don’t really care much. I hope not to pass out of stage again, but we’ve written some new material, and it sounds good.” I shrugged.
“Ryan really works hard for you guys, Brendon. He cares about his band more than anything.” Hagen chimed, probably the first time I’ve heard heart voice in the past, well, ever.
“Yeah, I know, but I just don’t think we’re worth it. At least, I’m not. I think he deserves a band that cares as much as he does.” I admitted.
“Shut up! Brendon, don’t doubt yourself! You totally deserve it dammit. Its that Brent kid that didn’t deserve it, but he left.” Paige sympathized, in assertive manner.
“Yeah, I don’t know. I just can’t see us getting big when we’re starting off this crappily. Fainting and suicides isn’t the best, most effective way to the start off.” I shrugged.
“Whatever, you need to get over your big bad self, Brendon. I haven’t seen Ryan this happy in forever, so you just need to sit there and look pretty.” Kyle pointed a finger at me, almost intimidatingly.
“Really.” All three of them said, a matter-of-factly.
“Look, I don’t want to mess up his happiness and stuffs, I was just, you know, doubting my skizzlez, like everybody does.” I ran a hand through my hair.
“Whatever.” Hagen rolled her eyes, facing forwards.
“Yeah, so how does this whole dance thing work? Do we play whole night, or at the beginning or at the end or what?” I asked, trying to chance the subject.
“We play a couple songs at the endish of the thing. Then they crown their whole sophomore king and queen of the year, a its about the gayest, most cliche thing to ever surface.” Paige informed me with a thumbs up.
“That’s wonderful. So we’re there like an hour earlier for sound check?”
“Yeah. We’re there an hour early, and don’t even have to play ‘til like, three hours into it.” She said, annoyed.
“That’s pretty stupid, we should just play, then leave.” I suggested.
“That’s the plan. At least our plan. Me, Oli and Kyle are just gonna leave and go party somewhere down at the strip. Go to a club or something.” She gloated. She was pretty small in size for her age, and didn’t have as much cleavage necessary for getting into a club IDless, but Paige could probably make a mountain move if she nagged enough. Asian Persuasion.
But then again, fake ID’s do exist.
“Naww, its okay. I’ll probably go and chill with Ryan and Spencer and their little group.” I excused.
“Yeah, I think we’re gonna hang out at a local casino or just crash someone’s parttyyy.” Hagen spoke up, considering she was in ‘their little group’.
“You guys are lame.” Kyle snorted, giving us lucks of disgust.
“Fashowfashow.” Paige agreed, giving Kyle a high five.
“I’m gonna laugh when you do something stupid when you’re drunk and you’re coming back, crying to me about how bad your conscience is killing you and about how bad of a person you are.” Hagen snickered at her, pointing her finger.
Paige’s smile immediately fell, “I seriously hope you die in a fire.” She glared at Hagen.
“Love you too, buddy.” Hagen shot back.
We had had numerous amounts of practices and crap before today.
Paige had kept her screaming and bitching to a minimum, surprisingly enough. Nobody got their head ripped off. There are only two specific things that set her off. One, when you do something wrong or imperfect. Two, when you forget her name. Then you’re pretty much asking for hell.
( true story. that’s what my coach said when he was telling this kid he had to play doubles with me. he’s all “she’s loud, but if you don’t mess up or forget her name, she won’t yell at you. fortunately that kid was insanely good, and didn’t forget my name, so we were all good.)
Brendon had seemed a tad more optimistic, and followed and listened to everything I had said.
Spencer. Oh, Spencer.
I had been with his family for a little over 3 months, and I have never felt so at home in my life. I have never felt so in love either. It’s really hopeless because Spencer’s pretty much my brother, and I know he’ll never like me back the same way, but not if he doesn’t know anything. That’s why I’ve never told anybody and plan on not telling anybody, because then things would just get awkward. Especially when you’re sharing a room with them and have raging hormones. Things could get a little out of hand.
But we don’t talk about that...
Anyways, I had ended up asked Lacy Mosely.
She was the new girl from Texas, dark hair and eyes, mysterious. She seemed as close to ‘my type’ as I was going to get. I had made small talk with her in math. The girl was seriously talented. I had heard her scream for her band, and holy shit nipples, she was good. She could play guitar like a mother, ‘my type’. So I asked her, because hell, who else was I supposed to?
Everybody had just left their equipment in Spencer’s basement, and from there we loaded their crap into his van that way when we got there, everything would be together, (hopefully) in one piece, and there would be no time wasted waiting for people to show up.
I looked at the ‘man’ in the mirror.
I had straightened by hair with the straightener as hot as it could possibly be, so my hair turned out pretty well. My eyes outlined in thin eyeliner, just enough to make my eyes look darker, not enough to make it look like I was wearing make up. I fixed the collar of my crimson red collar. I had on a red button down shirt, with a black vest over it, with a white blazer over that. And then just black slacks.
Mom would of been proud.
I marched downstairs to find Spencer drumming downstairs on the side of the couch.
He had on just a black button down shirt underneath a black blazer with black slacks... with black eyeliner. He looked good.
“Dude, we gots to go!” Spencered spazzed at me, practically shoving me out the door.
“Okayokayokay!” I calmed him down by picking up my speed and hopping in the passenger’s seat.
He ran to the back of the car, checking to see if everything had been there, and it had.
Spencer practically sprinted to the driver’s side, jamming the key into the ignition, and almost backing into a tree. “Whoa, slow your roll man. We’re not going to be late, we’re gonna be fine.” I tried to soothe his stressed self, but he still kept driving 30 miles over the speed limit. He slowly slowed down to 25 miles above the speed limit, but I’m just glad I got him to slow down at all.
“I hope Urie doesn’t pass out this time.” I attempted again to keep his mind off of his stress. His drums were having issues. He wasn’t sure whether the base drum was gonna make noise, and if the stool was going to break or not.
He chuckled, “yeah, don’t we all. If he does I may have to slap a hoe.”
“A hoe or two. Or three. Or five.” I joked, watching as the speedometer started to bounce back to normal.
“Yeah. Maybe, I’m still trying to decide whether I actually like our set list.” He start worrying again.
We had agreed on playing a few of our newer songs:
But Its Better If You Do
Nails for Breakfast, Tacks For Snacks
I Write Sins Not Tragedies
Time To Dance.
We picked those because they’re catchy and bouncy for the most part, and we felt as though that would have the most appeal to all the teenie boppers listening to it.
“Look man, our sets killer. No shut up and drive. But drive slowly.” I snapped at him, hoping he’ll listen to me about the whole slowing down thing.
He rolled his eyes and sped up until we hit school property, where if you sped, even if it was 4 AM, they would whoop your ass.
We headed over to the gym, not knowing what to expect.
As soon as we entered it, we were attacked by thousands of balloons and the color blue. The stage was, of course, empty with Brendon and Paige waiting anxiously.
“LATE.” I heard somebody say, I didn’t even have to ask. Only one person would yell at you for being late. Only one person. The other person too nice to tell you your fly’s undone.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” Spencer apologized half heartedly.
“It’s all good.” Brendon slurred. I assure you, its not all good.
Brendon wore a white, rolled up collared shirt with a black pinstriped vest go top of it, with black slacks.... like the rest of us.
“Yeah, so we hope.” I spoke under my breathe.
“Yo, cheer yo ass up, we’ve got a show to play.” Paige encouraged, patting me on the back. Unlike the rest of us she wore a dress... I can’t see Spencer in a tube top. She wore a black strapless sheen dress with a pleated upper bust, waist and bodice, with a bubble hem. The dress long enough to just barely cover her tan line from tennis shorts and skirts. She wore a pair of black pumps that made her a good two inches taller, which was still pretty short regardless.
“Hey, I’m cheery and stuff.” I forced a smile, lying through my teeth.
“Bitch, please.” She rolled her eyes, took the my car keys from my hand and walked towards the exit of the gym, “I’m gonna set up, I don’t know what you people are waiting for, but just let me know when you figure it out.”
“We should probably go and set up.” I said, looking up at the barren stage.
“Yeah, probably.” Brendon mumbled, heading towards the car.
We walked out of the gym to the idle car, where shit was being unloaded by Paige and a random freshman that nobody really knew, but everybody knew existed.
We took out most of the equipment, and set it all backstage, without anybody getting crushed by an amp, because that would be a bad thing.
Mics were set up, the drums were thankfully working, and everybody seemed pretty pulled together, so we were ready for sound check.
“Are you people ready to play?” I asked into the mic, his eyes eager.
“Les gooo.” Spencer said, counting off, “One, two, three, four”
“Now I’m of consenting age, to be forgetting you in a ca-” I began to purr, but then I heard a “SHIT. FUCK.” from non only from our most favoritest bassist.
“Alright, what’d you do?” We all stopped, staring at a annoyed and red faced Paige.
“Dude, my G string broke. It like snapped in half.” She complained, hissing curse words under her breathe at her guitar.
“YOU’RE SO NEW.” Spencer screamed from behind his set.
“So, what do we do now? Brendon asked, even more annoyed.
“Dude, I don’t have my actual case case thing we me. Its at my house. I’m gonna have to call Hagen or someone and they’re gonna have to bring it to me. Now.” She informed, quieter and more self conscience that usual.
“We have 30 more minutes in sound check. You need someone to run their ass over to your house, and over here in that time. You get yourself on the phone little missy.” I said, TRYING to keep cool, but obviously failing to by pegging my phone at her.
“Jeez, just hold yourself for a moment.” She said giving me the wide eyed stare, like I was the one who was crazy.
She went into my phone book, and dialed a familiar number.
“Yo. I need you to run your ass over here, I have a broken G string, and there’s 30 minutes left in sound check.” She spoke so quickly, I doubt Hagen caught anything she said.
“You do!?...... Oh, you’re awesome........ You are so not new......... Pat yourself on the back fo meee.......... cool....... GOD BLESS YOUR FACE....... I’ll see you in a little bit....... Kay, byezzzz.” Her conversation ended in 30 seconds, relief flooded her face.
I stared at her for a while, until she spilled.
“Kay, Hagenski says she keeps extra strings in her car for some odd reason, but she’ll be here in like 5 minutes, so just chill yourselves out. You can play without a bassist, it just won’t be as good.” She gloated, smiling wide.
“Yeah, that’s nice. Just stand there and look pretty, like bassists normally do, alright?” I smirked at her.
She glowered at me, and pegged my phone right back at me, hitting me in the gut. That’s sure to leave a bruise for the next, I dunno, life time.
“You guys can bitch fight later, we just need to get this over with now.” Brendon complained, although, he was completely right.
“ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR” Spencer screamed from behind the drums, counting us off.
I slurred the words to ‘But Its Better If You Do’, strumming my guitar, being careful not to break any of my string.
Being on stage seemed so natural, it gave me a certain thrill. I don’t know what it was, but whatever it was, it’s all I ever wanted. Even tho there was nobody in the audience, I felt control over all the space. I felt security. Something I’ve never felt before in my life.
I looked over at Brendon, whom was not pale like last time.
I don’t even know what I’m going to say if he passes out again.
Something between the lines of “FUCK MY LIFE” and “this kid seriously needs to see a doctor”. Yeah, sounds about right.
But he’s learned his lesson, so there’s a good chance he won’t pass out on us again...
We headed towards the bridge of the song, Spencer’s favorite part.
Kinda a drum solo, but it was definitely a drummer’s part. For a few seconds, it was just Spencer on his own, rocking out.
“Well, I'm afraid that I, Well, I may have faked it , And I wouldn't be caught dead-d-dead-d dead-d dead in this place” I sang. Probably my favorite part in the song, it was kind of a smart ass, fun, part to sing along to.
We went back into the catchy chorus, Brendon in his little corner rocking out. By the time the song ended, everybody was really feeling the adrenaline rush.
“Heyyyy.” I heard from across the gymnasium.
Hagen was standing there with a pair of chords, swinging them.
Paige ran over to her, attacking her with a hug, a thousand thank you’s, and then ran back to her bass, replacing the new string in record time. She hopped on stage, and plugged her guitar back in.
I saw Brendon cringe from the corner of my eye.
“Are you done?” I asked, meaning to annoy her.
“Yeah, thanks for asking smartass, I am.” She smiled, plucking the first few notes of Camisado, “You just gonna stand there?”
Brendon started strumming, signaling the smart of the song.
Nails for Breakfast, and Camisado were quite obviously about my Dad, whom we didn’t even discuss with anymore. Nobody seemed to care enough to figure out the song meanings, so nobody bothered to care. Brendon didn’t ask questions. He knew us all better enough that to ask questions.
Spencer knew what it meant, but he didn’t really even comment on it. It made a good topic for songs, so HEY, we aren’t even gonna mess with it.
Song check flew by horribly fast.
We played 4/5 songs, leaving out I Write Sins Not Tragedies, personally my least favorite, and simplest. It’s all good. We’ll play it fine, and even if we mess up, it’ll be okay, because one of the first words in that song is ‘whore’ and kids like the word ‘whore’ I’ve learned.
“Common, babies, I’ve got work to do, grab your stuff, and leave my stage.” Mrs. Robinson pointed off stage.
( dude, I had an English teacher that called us babies. it was odd. Then I graduated eight grade. I no longer have her as a teacher. It was a happy day June 2nd at 9:16. Whooooooo.)
We scurried off stage, leaving the mics and drum set. By that time it had been, 7:30. The dance doesn’t start ‘til 8:00.
I went outside in the quad to see if anybody was there, and indeed the whole student body was attending.
Holy John the Baptist, this was going to be huge crowd. 300 kids, I’d say. And that’s everybody so far. Everybody 30 minutes before the dance even started.
“Hi Ryan.” Caro greeted me, a little more nervous for some reason. She bit her lip, something she would normally do when nervous. William and Kyle stood outside next to her, chilling besides the door, away from everybody else. William was wearing black slacks, with a black collared long sleeved shirt. Kyle was wearing a black tux with a white shirt underneath the blazer, and a shiny new nose ring. Caro was wearing a bright purple dress that reached her knees. Tight at the top, then loose and puffy at the bottom. She accessorized with a thin black necklace, and ankle boots. Her hair as straight as a death.
(Caro, I have no energy to dream you up a dress. I am sorry, it is 5 in the morning and you are just stuck with the copied and pasted dress from FT@BH. Sorry bout that. I just can’t do it. )
“Hey guys.” I smiled, shoving my hands in my pockets.
“How was sound check?” William asked, throwing an arm around Caro’s waste, in a defensive like manner.
“It was good. We’ll have a good set tonight.” I smiled, confident.
“See, I told you.” Kyle punched me, jokingly.
“Yeah, we’ll live if Urie doesn’t pass out again, but I doubt that’ll happen.” I stated the obvious.
William chuckled, “You’re never gonna let that one go.”
“I’m not mad at him, but I’m not gonna let him forget it.” I smiled, showcasing all of my pearly whites.
“Yeah, you’re a good friend.” Caro rolled her eyes.
“I try. I try.”
I ran away from sound check as fast as I could.
There is nothing I hate more than sound check.
Do not ask me why.
I just hate it.
I ran out of the gym, to find everybody and their mother’s whore standing outside, waiting to get it.
Yeah, big crowd. Big crowd, but nothing I haven’t played in front of.
Medical Plaza has actually gotten pretty far. We were actually really close to getting signed to Epitaph, but then something happened, and Oli said some things, and yeah. Label no more.
I skimmed through the crowd to find Lacy, Ryan’s date, Hagen, and Oli in a little group, then Caro, Ryan, William and Kyle in a little group too. I stood over by Gerard because Ryan has had enough of me, and I don’t hang around people you peg their phones at me, because that is just something I don’t want to be surrounded by.
“Yola.” I waved at Oli, Hagen, Lacy and Gerard.
Hagen wore a purple strapless dress with black lace over it, with black converse. Lacy had a black lace dress, spaghetti strapped, it had an older feel to it. She wore it with black ballerina flats. Then there was Oli. Oli was wearing black skinnies and a black hoodie. “Oli, you are allowed to look formal.” I informed him, smirking.
“I know that. I just chose not to.” Oli snapped back. “Whatever floats your boat, buddy.” I put a hand on his shoulder, then turning to Hagen.
“Thank you so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so much.” I thanked her, probably a little too much, but whatever.
“Yeah, you’re welcome.” She rolled her eyes, her lips curling up at the sides, only slightly.
“Hey, have you seen Ryan?” Lacy spoke up, her quiet voice barely audible.
“Yeah, he’s over there.” I pointed in his general direction.
“Cool.” She smiled, and headed towards him.
“How’s Panic?” Oli asked, looking at Ryan.
“They’re doing well. They’ll go far and stuffs.” I commented, crossing my arms over my chest.
“I don’t doubt it, but you better not leave us or else. We still need you in Medical Plaza.” Hagen warned me, striking fear into my bones.
“Yeah, okay okay. Trust me. I know. I know. It’s just I’m proud of them, ya know? It’s hard to see them suffer so much.” I reflected, looking at a happy Ryan, now embracing Lacy.
“Yeah, it is. But he’s happy now, so no worries.” Oli said, playing with the zipper on his hoodie.
“Nope. None.” I smiled, feeling as though I may of jinxed myself some way or another.
A couple hours later
I had been chilling out with the whole group/table thing for the past hours. They seemed to of been enjoying themselves.
I looked down at my watch, and nodded at Spencer, whom nodded at Ryan, whom nodded at Paige, who nodded at William who looked confused and scared.
“Yo, we is going nao, I shallz sayz a shout outz to yerr asses on teh stage. Peaceeee.” Paige said in her whole retarded gangsta voice, as she grabbed my wrist and pulled me back stage.
I grabbed my guitar, my trusty Gibson, the one I picked out at guitar center some time ago, with Hagen.
I tried to shake the memory from my mind, but its been burned into my brain.
I will never forget that night ever.
I guess you could say its the first time I’ve fallen in love. I don’t even know what it was anymore.
I sadly strummed on my guitar, trying to cheer myself up.
“Hey kid, what’s up?” Ryan came and sat down beside me.
“Nothing, just nervous.” I lied, running my fingers through my hair.
“Ahh. Look, don’t freak out. You’ll do great. It sounds cliche, but trust me, you’ve got natural. You’re better off me telling you this than one of the girls. They’ll sugar coat it and shove it down your throat.” He chuckled nervously, “but believe me, you’ll own. Just don’t think about it, just do it.” “Kay, I will. I’ll be fine. I promise.” I smiled, trying to reassure him. I don’t need freaking out even more for me. I don’t need anybody freaking out for me. I’ve got myself for that.
“If you say so. Get your stuff, we’re on.” Ryan stood up, stretched up and got his guitar.
I stood up and brushed off all the nervousness and sadness, and got the blood flowing.
“And now for the band of the night..... PANIC AT THE DISCO....” I heard Tyson Ritter announce, student body president.
There were tons of howls and WHOOOOOOOOOOOOO’s.
I ran out, the lights blinding me.
This wasn’t an unfamiliar setting, this has happened before, but if I had made the same mistake I made last time, then I would quite literally get my assed kicked- in the nicest way possible, of course.
“ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR.” I heard Spencer count off, like usual, and we were off, and I was actually conscience.
I felt the blood rush to the head (ahaha, I’m sitting here listening to Coldplay, I just felt the need to use a coldplay album pun- none of you people listen to coldplay. why am I talking about them?) so I’m assuming my face is a red as a freaking tomato. But, to my surprise, I felt the confidence level start to rise, and rise.
It was the most amazing feeling in the world.
Panic at The Disco had just started playing, and they weren’t are awkward as everybody thought they were going to be, but none of the kids really cared, most of them were there dancing their asses off.
Paige was just kinda there, rocking out like usual, doing her job, but Ryan, Spencer and Brendon looked so happy up there. And nobody passed out. So far, so good!
They played through their first four songs, so fast, with some small talk in between.
Their last song, I Write Sins Not Tragedies, everybody knew. I have no fucking idea how everybody knew it, but Ryan smiled like an idiot when he heard all the high schoolers sing along.
Brendon sang back up, and I’m not sure if this is a good thing, but I heard Brendon’s voice a little more than Ryan’s, and holy crap, Brendon has an amazing voice.
I mean, I like Ryan’s voice, but from what I hear, I’d definitely promote Brendon to lead singer, which is a lot to say from hearing him sing back up. Maybe I’m just crazy, though.
I don’t know. I was never really sure.
I don’t know what happened to me and Brendon either. It was so weird, one day we just stopped talking all of a sudden, then David popped into my life, and he’s, well, David. Ridiculously charming, smart, talented and all that jazz. Brendon just got awkward, I don’t even know what happened! Maybe some things are never meant to be.
“VEGAS, YOU GUYS HAVE BEEN INSANE, THANK YOU.” Spencer got up after their set.
“See you guys on Monday.” Paige smirked, then left stage.
There was clapping and howls and stuff, then everybody went back to gossiping.
I ran backstage to go and congratulate them.
I found Ryan first, and threw my arms around him, ‘RYANNNN!!!!! YOU GUYS WERE SO GOOD!”
He wiggled his way out of our hug, “Thank you, thank you.”
“You do you think you guys did?” I asked, still smiling.
“I think we did well.” He said, not trying to be cocky.
“Well you guys killed.”
“That’s nice to know.” Ryan blushed, “hey, I’ll be back in a second.” He ran away, leaving his guitar.
“Brendon, you need to go get all of the guitar cases, I left them in the car. I have to pack up the drums. We need to be out of her in 20 minutes before they announce king and queen.” Spencer yelled from stage.
“Dude, I can’t get all the cases by myself.” I excused myself.
He sighed, “Hagen, make yourself useful and help Brendon.”
Me and Hagen exclaimed at the same time.
“Ryan’s collecting our gig money, and Paige is fraternizing with Kyle. You need to stop being so lazy, and help me out here. I’m getting the drum packed up, and then I’m packing up mics, least you can do is get the guitars packed up. ” Spencer instructed. You don’t even mess with Spencer when he’s in band manager mode.
“Fine.” Hagen rolled her eyes, as if it was a punishment.
Spencer threw his car keys at us, and we ran out the doors, looking for his car.
I popped the back trunk open, and we searched for the guitar cases in the back.
“Found the base case, my guitar case, just need to find Ry’s.” I mumbled. “Found it.” She grabbed it out of the van, pulling it out. I slammed the door and grabbed the two cases.
If I were to confront her about us, it was now.
“Hey, Hagen.” I called.
“Hey, what?” She asked, stopping from being in front of me and waited for me to catch up to her.
“Um, er, what’s up?” I asked. Okay, well that was a stupid way to start this conversation.
“Um, nothing.” She started to walk faster again.
“Hagen, whatever happened to us?” I choked out. She stopped completely. “What do you mean?”
“Dude, we just totally stopped talking to each other, what happened? We used to, well, you know. We used to be close. Seriously, what happened? We just sorta fell apart.”
She turned pale, and slightly teary eyed, “I don’t know, we just started to meet different people.”
I rolled my eyes, “No, you met new people. You met freaking David Blaise, I was just left here hanging. You traded me for David.” I semi-yelled.
“What?! I can’t help that Oli shoved him into our band, okay?! It’s your fault! I’m not the bad guy, you let me go. You didn’t even say anything when I started to like him! Like you didn’t even care! And guess what? You don’t care!” She yelled at me, luckily we were outside.
“Oh, shut up. Anybody could tell you that I care about you. Don’t even play the whole ‘he was all over me’ card, because it doesn’t matter. You totally stopped caring about what I thought.”
“That is not true! I never stop caring, dumbass, you let me go. Even if you did care, you didn’t show me you did. It doesn’t even matter people, guess what?! I already have somebody, and that’s David. We’ve been like this for 3 fucking months, and you now have something to say about it!? You insensitive prick, I’m not gonna wait forever. I stopped waiting after you stopped caring, which was a while ago.” She screamed this time, storming off into the gym.
I finally got the drums all packed up, just waiting on Hagen and Brendon. Both of them had been acting really weird lately.
Hagen ran backstage with Ry’s case, with this fire in her eyes. And we’re not talking a good type of fire, we’re talking somebody is going to burn in hell, and she will make damn sure dammit that it’ll happen.
“Here’s your case.” She threw the case at me, and ran out into the crowd.
A few seconds later, Brendon came with the base case and his own, throwing them, and stomping off.
“Thanks guys.” I mumbled to myself, sighing.
Now I have to pack up all their crap too, like usual.
There are not words to explain how pissed I am, because non of this was my fucking fault.
None of it.
Like I’m so pissed, I can’t even talk about it without blowing up, which is exactly why I’m not gonna talk about it again.
I stood in a circle with Ryan, Hagen, Paige, David, Kyle, Oli, William, Caro, Lacy, and Gerard, the usual.
We always stood in circles. Never squares.
Oli looked down at his watch, “Yo, we should get going now.”
“Kay, see you people later.” Kyle said, giving everybody a hug.
“You guys sure you don’t wanna come?” Paige asked for last chances.
There was a chorus of ‘naws’
“Yeah, sure, I’ll go.” I spoke up. I don’t wanna hang out with Hagen anymore tonight, it’s too much.
“Really?” Oli asked, turning back around.
“Ya.” I reassured. What the hell am I doing?
“Cool.” Kyle said, surprised.
“Bye guys.” I waved, following Oli to his car, ready to actually have a fun night.
I really can’t believe Brendon right now.
He’s an arrogant ass hole, he always blames everybody but himself.
And now he’s gonna go party like a badass down at the strip, which he clearly wasn’t comfortable doing a day ago, but now I don’t even know.
They announced King and Queen of something or other.
Caro and William had won.
It was an obvious choice.
Everybody piled into the car, there was a party down at Craig Owens’ place, and everybody was going.
And when I say everybody, I mean everybody.
Almost every car from the high school went to his house.
I stood in the over crowded house, filled with smoke and such.
We had been there for probably an hour. I had just been hanging with Lacy and David, whose arm was securely wrapped around my waist.
We just kinda avoided the drinks because, well, there were far too many drunk running around here.
I don’t know where anybody else had gone.
Although, Ryan’s across the room making his way over to Spencer. Probably to talk about- HOLY SHIT.
Ryan, grabbed Spencer’s hair, and attacked his lips with his own.
He pulled away, smiling, then looking shocked at what we had just done.
I did not just do that.
I did not just do that.
I was only thinking of doing that, not actually doing it tho.
I screwed up.
He did not just do that.
Maybe he was drunk.
What the fuck?
All I saw was Ryan sucking face with Spencer.
My heart sank.
Maybe just too much beer, but I’m not gonna lie, it was a hot kiss.
Something that I missed from Ryan.
I don’t know what to think now.
I felt the hot sun on my face.
I rolled over, the sheets feeling uncomfortable.
I inched my thigh, realizing I’m naked.
I opened my eyelids, the room unfamiliar.
I suddenly stood up, surveying the room.
I looked out the window, seeing the rest of the downtown strip.
Where the hell am I?
How did I get here?
Think about it, Brendon.
Okay, well yesterday, I played, then I went with Oli and Kyle and we went down town, and we went to a bar, and I had a drink or two and I met a girl...
and this is probably her room.
And holy shit.
I’m so screwed.
Bwhaha, cliff hanger.
Dudes, its 4 in da morning, and I’m tired, and I have no energy to proofread any of this.
I’m sorry, I’ll edit this later, I promise.
I’m so sorry for no updating for forever.
I love you people so much.