By now it was lunch, and I was on my way to the cafeteria. From walking down the hall, I could smell the food. It made me want to be sick. It was disgusting, extremely. I pushed open the double doors and searched for my usual table, hoping it would be empty.
Luckily, it was. I went down the few stairs and walked to the table, placing my bag in the seat next to me. All I had to do now, was wait for my friends. I was hoping they wouldn't take too long. Something about this school made me feel less comfortable being alone.
As I waited, I decided I would listen to a few songs on my iPod. Grabbing it out of my bag, I pushed the headphones into my ears, and played the first song that I saw. It was A Box Full Of Sharp Objects by The Used. Just one of my favorites by the band, with no reason to it, other than it sounded great.
I looked around the over crowded lunch hall. People everywhere were in small or large groups, having fun with their friends, probably laughing about anything that happened this morning. I felt jealous. For seventeen years the only friend I ever had was Harry, my tutor. And he was thirteen years older than me. The friends I had now... So far it was like, a three day old friendship. It didn't really count for anything yet, not really.
I continued looking around, but not at the different people, but in search of my new friends. Where were they? They hadn't left me, had they? I really hoped not. I didn't need my confidence being knocked any more than it already had.
My eyes stopped when I saw the doors I came through opened with a bang. I was surprised when no one looked behind them to see who it was. But when I saw the guy, I knew why they hadn't turned. It was something they were used to.
Gerard practically jumped down the stairs, and stomped over to the vending machine in the corner of the hall. I watched with anger as he pushed passed all the students in the line, and used his money to get a soda. The students who were in the line just looked down and pretended not to notice anything.
What was wrong with these people? How could they just let him push everyone around like that? He wasn't boss of anyone, no body should have to put up with that. His behavior was pathetic and unessacery. No matter what his mood was, he shouldn't be like that to anyone. They had done nothing wrong.
Gerard turned around after grabbing his soda and almost immediately, his eyes landed on me. He stood frozen in his place, can in one hand, his other in his pants pocket. Our eyes were locked. I wanted to look away, but his eyes were just... There was something about his eyes that made me want to keep staring.
I remember from the picture on his door that they were an amazing hazel color. So beautiful. I also remember that Mikey has the same eyes, but I thought it was strange that Gerard's were much more beautiful. But even though that was true, the amount of emotions I saw in them was almost heartbreaking. He had to be the biggest asshole on earth, but I was sure he was in a lot of pain. But why?
"Hey." A high feminine voice pulled me out of my thoughts, and I unwillingly looked away and stared into the face of Suzanne.
I blinked a few times and took the headphones from my ears. After putting them in my bag, I looked back at the spot Gerard had stood, and saw he wasn't there anymore. I furrowed my eyebrows, but then turned back to Suzanne, "Hey." I replied.
I looked down at what she had in her hands and saw a pot of pasta and a white plastic fork. Suzanne gave a small laugh, "I had kind of strange morning... It felt as if all eyes were on me, you know? Odd, as I sit at the back of my classes, but still..." She smiled when she finished, but I could tell there was something wrong.
To go along with it, hoping she'd tell me more, I smiled too, "Do you know when you're gonna see your doctor?" I didn't want to force anything out of her. But I wanted her to know that she could talk to me.
She sighed, almost silently, "I'll probably make an appointment when I get home... No, actually, I will make an appointment. I know if I don't, Tom will." She smiled again, but this time it didn't reach her eyes. I didn't say anything, but just watched her. She used her fork to play with her pasta. She laughed again, "Crazy, can I get cravings now? 'Cause, I don't even like pasta... Is it just in my head, or am I getting cravings already?" She laughed again, but her voice faltered.
I took hold of her hands, "Hey, Suzanne, you okay?" I asked, concerned. She turned her head away, but I saw the tear that fell, "It'll be okay... You've got me and Tom here." She nodded, but didn't say anything, "It's okay to feel like this." Was it? How was I supposed to know? I've never known any pregnant people in my life.
Suzanne sniffed, and forced one of her hands free to wipe her tears away, "Is it? Really, Sam? I'm fucking sixteen years old and I'm pregnant. I'm so fucking scared. I'm too young to be a mom, I don't think I can do it." Luckily, she was talking quietly, so no one could hear her.
Unfortunately, when I looked round, I saw Gerard in the same spot he was before, looking as though he hadn't moved at all. Like before, he was staring at me, not paying any attention to Suzanne who was struggling to hold her tears back.
I looked back to her, trying to think of a way of getting her out of here. It made me feel even more uncomfortable with him watching me like that, "Suzanne, do you wanna go find Tom? I'm sure he can help you more than I can." Truth was, I had no idea what to do with someone who was upset. It just never came up when I was with someone. I didn't know how to comfort anyone except myself.
She didn't appear to have been paying attention to me, "What am I supposed to do? My mom will kill me. I can't abort it though, I'd never be able to live with myself..." She continued to talk to herself. I needed to help her somehow, but how?
Strangely, I was glad when I didn't have to make that decision. Stomping across the hall, a soda in hand, came Gerard. He eyes never left mine as he threw he can to me and turned to Suzanne. He lifted her up much like he did with me when he threw me out of Frank's house the other day.
He turned away from me and went towards the stairs. I quickly grabbed my bag, and kept hold of his soda before following him. We didn't say anything. All that was heard between us three, was Suzanne's crying.
I followed him up a few flight of stairs, only for him to go back down them, and back through the lunch hall and outside. I was sure whatever he was doing, was on purpose. He was trying to make me angry.
Finally, I saw that the gym was in sight. Of course, Tom was there. Gerard was taking her to her brother. We still didn't say anything when he entered the gym. It wasn't until a kicked a door closed in my face that I realized I wasn't following him anymore. I looked up and saw the sign. The guys were in there. That's why he had closed the door.
It was only seconds later Gerard came back out, and pushed me away from the door. When I was a fair distance away from it, he moved past me and walked away as if I never existed. I sighed, angrily.
"Hey!" I called after him. He didn't stop, nor did he reply, "What the fuck are you doing!? I wanted to help her and you know I can't go in there! I'm fucking talking to you jackass!" I know I shouldn't be talking to him like that. I didn't care so much that another teacher could give me detention for using such language, I cared more about what Gerard would do. Well, I didn't care now. But I would later, "Don't fucking ignore me fucking asshole!"
Students in the halls stopped what they were doing to stare at us, or just me. Their eyes were opened wide, and their jaws were dropped. I gave a few a look that made them stop. I continued to follow Gerard up until we got to his classroom, "Don't you walk away from me! You know, you're such a jerk-!"
I was cut short when he slammed his door in his face. I stared at it for a few seconds, before reaching for the doorknob, only to find that he had locked the door. I sighed... And then started banging in the door, "You fucking coward, open the fuck up! You fucking jerk, you have no right to be like this!" I stopped after that. I was getting no response from him.
Just as I was about to walk away, he opened the door. I was going to say something, but he just reached out and grabbed the soda I forgot I was holding, and slammed the door once again.
I groaned and kicked his door, "What's wrong with you!? Can't take some girl screaming at you!? Well, I should think it makes a nice change! I'm sure I'm the only girl who you've ever made scream!"
As the words left my mouth, I regretted them. That was totally inappropriate of me. Right in front of me, the door flew open, and Gerard had the look of a murderer on his face. I muttered a sorry before running away, ignoring everyone's stares.