I wanted to stop him but I knew there was nothing I could say.
Chapter 9 - Difficult
"How exciting!" Gerard exclaimed, bounding up to me where I leaned against the wall, unable to breathe. He was gone. Monday would arrive and it would be like I didn't exist again. "What's wrong? You look sick,"
"He left." I said simply.
He shrugged, "That's okay, you'll see him at school,"
I shook my head slowly, "No, Gerard. He said he didn't want to see me anymore."
He rolled his eyes, "Dude, he got a little freaked out! He told you he was straight because he thought he was." Gerard was making assumptions. Correct assumptions, but it was the principle of the matter.
"How do you know anything happened?" I asked, pushing myself away from the wall.
"Are you kidding? It was so tense in here. I'm not stupid." he scoffed and walked away.
Uncontrollable rage took over me and I ran up behind him, tackling him to the ground. "What the fuck are you even doing home! You ruined everything, you fucking prick!" I screamed. It didn't even feel like I was the one yelling.
"Mikey, what the fuck! Stand up, you child!" I controlled myself enough to get off of him, but not to regulate my breathing. "Don't get pissed off at me 'cause you're boyfriend left. I bet you any amount of money that the guy is just sitting outside in his car, trying to decide whether or not he'll come back in and apologize. So go there and fucking talk to him. Jesus." he huffed and walked to his room, and slammed the door behind him.
I walked outside and to the front yard. I looked down the street for a red truck, guessing that he didn't park near to house unless one of the many people from the school that know where I live just happened to drive by and put two and two together, spreading it to the whole school that Frank Iero had his dick sucked by little, quiet Mikey Way. Yeah-fucking-right. I spotted a red truck and began walking toward it. Frank was in the driver's seat, looking contemplative. I walked up to his door without him noticing me; he was concentrating really hard on his hands. I knocked on the window and he snapped up, getting out of the truck.
"Go back inside!" he scream whispered. I shook my head, not moving an inch. "Why the fuck are you being so difficult!" he pushed me once, and I stumbled backward.
"Why are you so afraid?" I asked quietly. I stepped closer to him and he turned away. "I mean, I understand, you don't want the school to know because this is new to you, but it's my brother. He's not going to tell anyone,"
He shook his head, "You don't get it. There shouldn't be anything for anyone to find out. This can't continue Mikey." I felt like he had just punched me in the stomach. He might as well have. "I gotta go," He pulled open his door and got in. I wanted to stop him but I knew there was nothing I could say. He pulled away from the curb and sped down the street.
I walked back inside dejectedly and stomped into my room, slamming the door behind me. I flopped down on the bed and tried to fight back the tears that were stinging the backs of my eyes. Gerard knocked on my door while opening it. I turned the opposite direction, "Go away," I mumbled.
"Mikey, it's okay." I felt his weight next to me on the bed. "If it's meant to be he'll come around."
I sniffed. "Or maybe he'll just bully me more in his own twisted form of compensation."
He sighed, "Stay positive, little brother." he started rubbing my back lightly, making me tired.
I spent the entire weekend dreading Monday. When my alarm startled me awake that morning I contemplated tossing my clock out the window and sleeping the day away. But I remembered the History test I had first period and forced myself out of bed. I groaned, realizing that I forgot to wash my uniform and it had been sitting in a pile on my floor for the whole weekend. I picked it up, attempting to smooth out some of the wrinkles, not wanting to get in trouble for having my clothes a mess. "Mikey!" my mother called from upstairs. They must have made it home after I'd fallen asleep.
I pulled on my jacket and grabbed my backpack, running upstairs. Mom was standing at the stove cooking breakfast and Dad was at the table reading the paper. They were so predictable. "Yeah, mom?" I asked, sitting down at the table without any food. My appetite was sorely lacking.
"How was your weekend, baby?" she asked.
I grimaced. "It was fine."
"That's good. Are you gonna have some breakfast?" he asked, setting a plate in front of Dad.
I shook my head, "Nah, I'm not hungry. I should get going actually." I stood up from the table and my mom kissed my forehead before I left. I sat down on the front steps of the house, awaiting the bus to hell. Sshortly after I heard the door open behind me. Gerard sat down beside me, smoking a cigarette.
"You gonna be alright, buddy?" he asked, ruffling my hair.
I shook my head, resting my chin on my knees. "I can't do it, Gee, I don't want to face him,"
"Look," he said, inhaling his smoke sharply. "You have to act like you have all the fucking confidence in the world. Then he'll want you even more."
I bit my lip as the bus pulled up in front of the house. "You really think that'll work?"
He nodded, "Absolutely."
I half smiled, "Okay, thanks." Anything was worth a try.