I couldn't stop running, I wouldn't let myself. I could hardly breathe but I didn't mind, I knew I had to get away. Everything was just reoccurring. I got a friend, I got pissed at them, I hurt them, they hated me. That's just how things worked. But every time I'd always run. Just because I couldn't take the truth. Honestly, I never had been able to. I ran out of the gates and down the street, still running. By now I was hooked on adrenaline and wasn't giving up. It was partly because I knew I'd hurt Gabe and partly because I knew that if I stopped running, I'd realise that I was lost in a new place. I had no idea where I was, but I kept running. I found myself sitting on a park bench, desperately trying to catch my breath. I honestly can’t say I wasn’t surprised when A boy came and sat down beside me with a look that said ‘murder’ on his face. I pretended I hadn’t noticed his presence and continued gazing at the soft, fluffy cloud on the sky. The thought of soft, fluffy things reminded me of the woollen rug in the middle of the living room floor, and I felt my stomach knot. I wanted to go home, go back to the semi-normal life I had, instead of being thrown into a strange, new environment with mental kids. The boy coughed to get my attention. I glanced round at him. He had dark brown ‘sex hair’ and gorgeous brown eyes that shone amber when the sun reflected in his eyes. He had particularly flamboyant, unique makeup and was… well, I can’t exactly put this lightly… He was so fucking skinny!
‘Err… what do you want?’ I asked him.
‘Why the fuck did you do that to Gabe? What did he do to you?’ The boy yelled at me. He was from the hospital. I rolled my eyes.
‘Because I did. Good enough?’ I said, death glaring at him.
‘Don’t be an as swipe. You’ve gotta come back. You don’t have a choice’ The boy told me.
‘What ever, whoever you are…’ I muttered, staring into space.
‘A) It’s Ryan, B) my face is over here!’ Ryan said. I looked at him. His arms were folded and he had a look of annoyance on his face.
‘Whatever, Ryan’ I smiled sarcastically.
‘I’m not playing, Brendon’ Ryan sighed.
‘You might not be, but I am’ I told him.
‘Look, we all have issues. We can’t help it’ Ryan told me, sitting down beside me. He was speaking in a much calmer tone than before and the look on his face had softened.
‘I’mma avoid you’ I muttered.
‘That’s gonna be difficult considering I’m your roommate’ Ryan smiled. Fuck it.
‘Shit’ I whispered.
‘Yeah, shit to you too. If we head back now, you can put your stuff in our room and everyone can get to know each other a little more in the group session’
‘I don’t wanna go to know group session! They’re probably rapists or something’ I complained.
‘Nope. No rapists. If you want I can tell you a bit about everyone now?’ Ryan smiled.
‘O-Okay… then…’ I said, my voice merely a whisper. I’m not sure why I was so scared, to be honest.
‘Well, there’s Pete, he’s bipolar. And there’s his boyfriend, Patrick. No one is entirely sure what’s wrong with Patrick. He doesn’t talk much so no one except Pete really know him at all. Then, there’s Gabe. He’s got some weird obsession with Cobras. I remember when he first arrived, no one understood the link between Uruguay and cobras’ Ryan said.
‘Uruguay?’ I asked.
‘Gabe was born there. Anyways, we’ve learnt there is no link between them’ Ryan smiled.
‘Is that all the people?’ I asked.
‘No. There’s Gabe’s boyfriend, William. He thinks everyone will attack him. You have to be extra careful about what you say and do around him, which, for you, will be difficult, so I guess you’ll have to wait and see..’ Ryan smiled.
‘And that’s it?’ I asked.
‘No. There’s Jon and Spencer, who are dating. They’re my best friends. They can actually leave when they want, but their parents don’t want them back. There are other guys here. And everyone has a boyfriend except me…’ Ryan sighed.
‘Everyone’s gay?’ I asked as if I’d been born two seconds before. Well, I more or less had. I’d only been half paying attention to what Ryan was saying.
‘Yeah… wasn’t that obvious?’ Ryan smiled.
‘No…’ I sighed.
‘Oh shit… a straight homophobe? I’ll have to go now then…’ Ryan sighed, standing up. I reached out and grabbed his hand quickly.
‘No, Ryan. I’m not even straight, so I’d probably find it quite hard to be homophobic’ I told him, looking up at his beautiful swirling pools of ambers, golds and browns.
‘Really?’ Ryan asked, his face lighting up. I nodded and stood up.
‘So… this group chat thing… you sure that no one will rape me?’ I asked.
‘Yeah… I’ve been here five years, never been raped’ Ryan smiled.
‘Five years? How old are you?’ I asked.
‘Fourteen. I’ve been here since I was nine for being anorexic. I also got beaten by my alcoholic dad. So basically, I have two reasons for being here’ He sighed, staring at the floor. I gently raised his chin up with my fingers. He was staring directly at me now. His eyes were beckoning me with there gorgeous, tempting colors. I leant in and gently kissed his lips. To my surprise, he kissed back. He licked my bottom lick, begging for entrance, which, of course, I granted. I ran my fingers through his hair as he stroked my cheek. He began to nibble my bottom lip, causing me to moan like a cheap whore. My skinny jeans were unbelievably tight. We both pulled away at the same time, still gazing into each others eyes. I glanced down to notice a very visible ‘problem’ showing through his skinny jeans too. I smiled and he smiled back. I gently held his hand, rubbing small circles on the top of his hand with my thumb.
‘Let’s go’ I smiled, feeling a lot more confident about the group session. I wasn’t entirely sure what Ryan and I were, but I wasn’t really thinking about it since I was still shocked that he kissed me back. He nodded and the pair of us began walking… well, strolling back to the ‘school’.
I was smiling like a maniac.
Ryan was smiling too.
I knew it was moments like these that made life worth living.