It's so comfy and nice and warm! And earthy smelling?
I shuffled around a bit so I could fully enjoy it and then looked around at my surroundings. My bed, Gerard, moaned.
"Gee?" I croaked.
"Whaaat?" he replied.
"Should we go now? I'm hungry."
"Uh-huh." I got up to sit on the side of the ditch, holding Gerard's jacket for him.
"You're so dirty!" I remarked when he got up, looking at his messy clothes.
"You were the one RUBBING..."
"Your Clothes." I pointed at him.
"Ohh" he said, brushing his top down. "Forget that...But...Last night, You WERE looking at my crotch right? Come on, say it!" he stretched out.
"No?" I almost whispered.
"You know it's true!" Gee teased, taking my hand.
I had no idea of what the time was, but it couldn't be earlier than 10am. School!! Shit!! "SCHOOL!!" I panicked, running ahead. Gerard didn't seem too concerned so I half dragged him along.
As we got to my house I began to worry more.
"Gee you need to change!" I reminded, trying my locked door. Damn, Mom and Dad are out...
"Uhm, I'm locked out." Nothing like stating the obvious!
Gerard: Last night was great! It felt so right having Frank lying on top of me. I brushed a little more dirt off before I got into my house.
Mom was sitting on the living room couch, and when she heard the front door close she came over to me, anxious.
"GERARD! W-Where were you?!" She hugged me, "And how are you so muddy? ...Did you and Stacey....?!"
I considered my choices of answers quickly...
"I'm okay. We went to a field aaand.'"
Mom cut me off with:-
"Oh Gerard, did you stay 'safe'? Did you use protection? Are you sure you both feel that way?"
"Uh, yes, yeah!" I replied bewildered-ly.
"Come on, I'll drop you at school get changed."
Fuck. Mom now thinks I shagged a girl. Shagged. A girl. She looked excited to hear it too! Crap...
"Oh yeah, on the way back I saw Frank, he needs a lift." I pointed out when mom started the car. She still looked shocked.
"Last night was fun, wasn't it?" Frank declared when we picked him up. The last thing I needed was for Mom to think, "3-way?"
"But Frank. I was with my girlfriend last night. You weren't there." I said through gritted teeth, glaring.
"I meant, WAS it fun?" he caught on. Phew!
"Duh! She's so sweet, sexy and kisses like... You gotta meet Stacey!!" My Mom listened quietly to our conversation.
We got to school at the end of 1st break and Mikey rushed over.
"Guys, where were you?"
"Out. I'll explain later." I told him. The loud shrill bell rang and everyone went back inside for more lessons.
"What'll I do with no books?" Frank asked, taking his seat beside me in Physics.
"Look at mine." I took out my stuff.
I smiled to myself as Frankie moved closer to me to read over my shoulder. Luckily we were at the back of the class so nobody would see us two.
As usual Mr.Langford got distracted and gave us easy work on black holes. We had to work with a partner to make the best description of a black hole. We didn't really take it seriously.
"It's when a star dies and implodes?" I suggested.
"Yeah and it sucks stuff in." Frankie made a sucking in noise which sounded sick and burst into giggles. I wrote our vague answer down.
A few minutes later he asked,
"Did you model your 'girlfriend' on me?"
"You were my inspiration." I said proud but smugly.
"But why did you say it was a girl and not me?" He sounded hurt.
"'Cos Mom wanted me to give you a rest for a while so I said I was meeting Stacey to get out." I explaine all in one.
"I get it!" Frankie grinned, accepting what I had said.
"Last night was fun though." I whispered. I wished I was back in the field with Frank now instead of school. It'd be the holidays soon though anyway...Soon-ish.
Class dragged on for this double period, revising the symesters work, which wasn't too hard.
Me, Mikey and Frank took our normal seats alone but we didn't speak for a while. Mikey had something big on his mind, I could tell.
"Don't kill me," he worded carefully, "But are you two like... Dating?" he said quietly.
"Uhhh....." What do I say?! I can't tell him i'm dating, right?
"Mikey, don't feel alienated but, I guess you could say so." Frank whispered. Him saying that warmed me up inside, to put it in a cheesy way.
"You're okay with that?" Frank checked appologetically, touching his hand. I almost snatched Frank's hand away. I didn't want my anti's mixing to put it nicely.
"It's fine." Mikey smiled weakly. "Thanks for saying." he added. Oh, he was close to getting a telling-off!
"Just, no telling Mom or Dad, please?" I butted in. Mikey nodded. As long as he didn't tell, it's all good I suppose.
Gerard: That day I walked Frank home, not daring to hold his hand incase anyone saw. He did give me a kiss at his door though. I went home, oblivious to the fact Mom had spread the gross, untrue news to Dad and Mikey.
I was in my room, doing homework and drawing when Mikey entered.
"What is it?" I laid down my watercolour brush.
"I overheard Mom saying you did Stacey Howard! I thought you were with Frank! You can`t cheat on him!" he was worried and shaky!
"Cause he doesn`t deserve that, it`s sick!" Mikey cut in.
"No Mikey" I persisted, "I pretended I was dating her so I could go see Frank."
Mikey looked faintly disturbed and astonished. "You had sex with him?!" I shook my head.
"Just slept together..." I sighed then added, "With clothes on! You`re not against that, are you?"
"No, not at all I was just curious. I mean, we sleep together in out clothes and stuff..." He shrugged and looked at me for a moment before leaving.
I was the center of attention at dinner. Oh yay.
"So Gerard I heard you and Stacey Howard have been seeing each other?"
"How long have you been dating?"
I answered all these questions with model answers:
"Yep" I smiled proudly.
"Sure is." I pictured Frank in my mind, licking my lips without meaning to.
"A while." I guess.
My family were so inrerested in who i apparently fucked. Jeez!! Now I have to make up all these lies!
"Could we meet her?" Mom asked excitedly.
"Uhm...When? How?" How could I get around this?
"Friday, a meal out someplace? She could stay over!"
"Good." I pushed my plate away from me, glanced at Mikey, who copied.
He followed me to my room.
"What`ll I say?!" I burst out, in panic.
"Say she`s... ill? But Frank`s parents are away? So he can come?" Mikey said slowly.
I thought it through. It could happen!
"Yeah! I could try, you`re the best!" Mom would definately get that, she already knows Frank`s parents are frequently out.
"What?" Gerard huffed and explained again.
"So you said you fucked a chick and your parents wanna meet her?"
"Yeah, but I could say she`s ill but your parents are out and, i might be able to get you to stay over!" Gerard grinned, leaning closer.
"Today?" I asked, charged up by any such prospect.
"My parents ARE out then!"
Gerard`s mom, Donna, pulled in to the parking lot.
"C`mon, get in so you can back me up." Gee was about to get hold of my hand.
"Shouldn`t you walk Stacey home?" Donna asked.
"She`s really ill, got a nasty virus and left today. She can't make it for Friday." Gerard said disapointedly.
"Poor thing! Oh, hello Frank."
"Hi." I turned my attention to Gee,
"My parents are gonna be out for the next week or so, can I get more lifts back? It sucks being alone."
"Hey, why don't YOU come for a meal on Friday!" Gerard said enthusiatically, "Can he?" he asked Donna.
"Well sure." She nodded.
"We could put up a tent...!" Gee suggested, taking it a bit too far.
"Hmmm, I don't think so." she replied.
"Please?" Gee asked sweetly.
"Not this time." Not THIS time? Score.
A few minutes later Mikey got in the car and we drove off. Gerard exchanged quick nods with his brother.
It was true what I had said.
I made myself a caesar salad and ate it in my room. I played my Gibson until late then played my CD from Gerard, cherishing every note.
Every note made me want to be with him. When the last track ended I went to sleep, my head filled with thoughts and feeling louder than the empty house.
Wednesday, form class
"You look so sweet when you're excited!" Gerard complimented. I got really embarassed so looked down, my cheeks glowing pink. Mark, one of the big guys in the year threw a paper ball at me. Gerard looked scared, he must have a history with him.
"Frank is it?" he jeered. He intimidated me a little, he looked like a guy I once knew so i remained quiet. Apparently he goes around in his group of 4 and just... Terrorises people for fun.
"Well?" he continued.
"Yeah." I replied unsurely.
"You're one of them punk freaks aren't you?" Mark sounded repulsed. I looked at Gerard for guidance.
"So you're friends with Way? Pathetic." I cringed.
This reminded me of my last school very badly.
Gerard was scowling now.
"Fuck off Mark." He growled.
"Aw how sweet sticking up for him." The teacher, Miss Hamilton gave the three of us a stern questioning stare.
"Sorry miss." Mark said, despite teh teahcer knowing he's not the most kind of pupils.
"He's always like that." Gerard explained. I mumbled back. I collected my stuff out my locker.
"Don't let him bring you down." he soothed.
All day I reflected on my old life: keeping to the darkest corners, hiding away in cubicles. Having little allies. The friends I did have were usually stolen off me, to turn to despise me. I wished I'd never experience that again, feeling insignificant and worthless. Little did I know someone out there would love me after all. It still hurts though, when people hate you for no reason. I was sure the same could happen again to me.
During lunch break I took Gee into the bathroom instead of eating in the cafeteria.
"What's up?" he asked. We went into a cubicle at the end.
"What have I done?" I said, holding his open jacket, my voice wavering.
"What do you mean?" Gerard touched my shoulder.
I told him a little about my old school, how I thought it might happen again. I spaerd the real bad details though. When i told anyone who said they were to help me the really bad things, they'd tell me i'm disgusting or pathetic or something.
"Once I was attacked with knives and -..." That was as far as I was prepared tot go. I let a tear roll down my cheek. Gee held me in a tight embrace, and I listened to his calming breaths.
My crying upset him so i tried to stop.
"Frankie, I'll never let them touch you" He said, gripping me tighter, " I hate them more than anything. Trust me, touch you and they'll get it." I wasn't up for it but he kissed me.
Instead of relief, I felt guilt for burdening Gerard with an even deeper hatred of Mark and his similar cronies.
I didn't walk home with Gerard that night, saying I felt ill and I had work to do. Gerard gave me my space as I hoped for.