A yaoi one-shot. Warning, may be depressing to many of those who read, if not all.
Zexion was banging on Axel's door and it was the middle of the night. The fiery redhead hadn't come out all weekend, so the blue-haired illusionist was worried. Demyx, Marluxia, and Roxas had joined him.
"Axel!" Zexion called through the door. "Come out!"
Axel was underneath his bed covers, head and all. He finally took off his coat and boots, leaving him in the tight black nylon tank top and the riding pants with his blazing red socks.
"Go /away/!" he called back.
"Please?" Zexion pleaded.
Finally, Marluxia lost his temper and knocked the door down. The Graceful Assassin pulled the covering off of the Flurry of Dancing Flames. Axel had one arm extended in front of him showing the cuts from his self-inflicted pain. He had tears running from his eyes to his arm and Roxas gasped along with Zexion.
"A-Axel," Zexion breathed. "Why didn't you say anything?"
The redhead simply buried his face in his arm. He began to pull it in, but Zexion caught his hand and fell to his knees.
"You said you were going to be okay," Roxas gasped.
"Just leave me alone," Axel cried.
"We need to get you some help," Demyx retorted.
"Just..." Axel sat up angrily, fire in his green eyes. "Go away!"
"I'm not leaving until you promise me you'll stop!" Zexion cried as the others ran out in fear.
"I..." He sighed. "I can't promise anything."
"Then I'm not leaving," Zexion sniffled as he stood only to sit beside a puffy-eyed Axel.
"I'm hopeless, Zexy," Axel sighed.
The redhead had his elbows propped on his knees and his face buried in his hands.
"No you're not," Zexion scoffed. "Ax, look at me."
Axel looked up to find Zexion had lifted his sleeve and taken off his glove to reveal his scars.
"Why didn't you say anything?" Axel demanded, taking the illusionist's arm.
"For the same reason you didn't," Zexion replied. "I didn't want help. I wanted to feel something again, just like when I had a heart."
"Why did you want to feel something?" Axel wondered as he turned to face the blue-haired boy.
"I love someone who doesn't love me back," Zexion replied sadly.
"Who?" Axel urged.
/You/, he thought. "That's not important," Zexion sighed. "All that matters is I'm here to help. Never forget that."
"Thank you, Zexy," Axel sniffled as he wrapped his arms around the Cloaked Schemer.
"No problem," Zexion sighed.
Axel let go, but Zexion caught his arm and ran his fingers along the gashes.
"What are you doing?" Axel asked curiously, watching the illusionist's fingers.
"Just watch," Zexion smiled.
He lifted his hand, and after a few seconds, the gashes began to disappear.
"Amazing," Axel breathed.
Zexion stood and began to walk out the door. He stopped in the doorway and turned. "I'll be sure that no one remembers this," he sighed then walked out.
Axel smiled and laid back, looking at his cleaned arm. He's always felt something for Zexion, he just wasn't sure what it was. Now, that feeling was beginning to shine through.
Zexion closed Axel's door, pressed his back against it, slid down, and pulled his knees to his chest. He folded his arms on top of them and buried his face in his sleeves.
"Why can't he see how much I love him?" Zexion cried softly. "I want him to hold me and whisper to me he loves me. I want to feel again."
The blue-haired illusionist, after a while, got up and rushed to his room. He slammed the door behind him and began rummaging through his dresser drawers. He searched frantically for the knife he had long forgotten, knowing he could feel something again. He curled up in the darkest corner of his room. The sharp edge of the tool made contact with his pale, fragile skin and he gasped in agony as he dragged it across.
"I don't love him," Zexion told himself as he did it again across his wrist after he took off and threw his glove. "I can't love him."
"Zexion?" Marluxia asked as he entered.
Zexion hid the knife behind his back and pulled down his sleeve.
"Over here," Zexion said weakly as he dropped the knife and hugged his knees to his chest.
Marluxia walked over and sat beside his new best friend. He looked at the Cloaked Schemer's face and saw the traces of his tears. Then was when he figured it out and grabbed Zexion's arm. The Graceful Assassin lifted Zexion's sleeve just in time for it to register with the illusionist. The pink-haired flower boy, as many in the Organization called him, gasped and lifted Zexion's chin to look him in the eyes.
"You promised me you'd stop," Marluxia breathed.
"Not everyone keeps their promises," Zexion sniffled.
Marluxia allowed the sleeve to drop, pulled Zexion in, and hugged him tightly. Zexion's knees dropped and he curled up in Marluxia's embrace.
"I love him so much," Zexion cried.
"I know, Zexy," Marluxia began weakly and shakily as he was on the verge of tears. "But you have to stop this. You're scaring me to death."
"I'm sorry Marly," Zexion apologized as he buried his face in the assassin's shoulder.
Marluxia laid his cheek on top of the schemer's head and cried along.
/I love you, Zexion/, Marluxia thought sadly. But you love Axel. One day I will up the courage to tell you and I was hoping for today, but you would only give in to longing and thus I will never be truly love and held by the true you.
After a while, the two had fallen asleep, Zexion still in Marluxia's arms and the assassin's head atop the schemer's. The door opened slowly as Larxene entered to find her boyfriend at last. What she had no clue of was that her boyfriend, Marluxia, didn't love her. He simply longed to be held.
"Marly," she whispered, trying to wake him and not Zexion. "Marluxia."
The Graceful Assassin's head shot up and he looked at her sleepily.
"What?" Marly yawned.
"Xemnas wants to see you and Zexion, like, right now," Larxene replied.
Marluxia nodded and carefully slipped away from Zexy only to lift him into his arms bridal-style and carried him to the Grey area. Sure enough, Xemnas was staring out the large glass wall at the heart-shaped moon, known as Kingdom Hearts. Marly set Zexion on one of the sofas before approaching Xemnas.
"You wanted to see us, Superior?" Marluxia asked after Larxene left.
"Yes," Xemnas responded as he turned to the assassin. "Where is Number VI?"
"Sleeping," Marluxia replied as he pointed to a couch behind him. "What is it you need us to do?"
"I need you to do reconnaissance on a new world," Xemnas said grimly. "It is called the Isla de Muerta."
"Yes, sir," Marluxia nodded. "We'll leave as soon as possible."
The Graceful Assassin strode over and knelt beside Zexion. Xemnas left and Marluxia turned his gaze to the young illusionist.
Tears came to the assassin's eyes as he whispered, "Why can't you see that I love you?" He took Zexion's hand in both of his. "You still love Axel, Axel loves Roxas, and I love you." He was crying by this time. "I love you more than the air I breathe or the heart I lack."
Zexion had been listening the entire time. He had no idea Marluxia felt that way. The schemer had always been so selfish, not realizing until then that his best friend was in love with him. Zexion held tight, trying not to spring up and wrap Number XI in his arms.
"You scare me when you're not at meetings," Marluxia continued. "It scares me when you cut. I just hope that you will love me one day and never leave me."
Zexion wanted to cry as he heard the soft clicking from Marluxia's boots. The door opened and closed almost immediately after. The young illusionist sat up slowly, propped his elbows on his knees, and buried his face in the palms of his hands.
"Why do we never talk about stuff like this?" he demanded of himself. He stood and told himself, "I will tell Axel!"
He took off at a sprint, his coat unzipping from the bottom the entire way, and stopped at Axel's door. He beat on the door and Roxas answered shirtless.
"Hey, Zexy," Roxas smiled.
Zexion's nonexistent heart split in half. "Hey, Roxas. Is Axel around?"
"He's taking a shower, but I'll tell him you came by," Roxas answered then gently closed the door.
Zexion let out a cry of frustration and anger before going back to his room. He curled up in that corner after finding the knife. He pressed it to his arm only to remember what Marluxia had said and how it scares him to death. The bedroom door opened and the assassin himself stepped in just as the tool fell from the schemer's hand. Marluxia rushed over and got down on one knee in front of Zexion.
"You didn't!" he exclaimed, grabbing the schemer's arm and lifting the sleeve.
"No," Zexion cried. "I didn't."
Marluxia pulled Zexion into his arms and held him tightly. Marly began to cry softly yet heavily. Zexion was lifted onto his knees and pressed against Marluxia's body. The Cloaked Schemer couldn't help but cry too and wrap his arms around Number XI.
"When I went back to the Grey Area, I saw you weren't there," Marluxia sniffled as he pulled away to look into his best friend's eyes. "I immediately thought you-"
"No," Zexion interrupted. "I've been selfish. Hurting myself only hurts those around me. I don't want to hurt you anymore, Marly. You're my best friend." The illusionist smiled.
Marluxia returned the smile, but he didn't show happiness in his eyes. Zexion could read them. Plain sorrow and pain. The illusionist felt bad knowing that his best friend was in love with him and his friend never told him. Zexion pulled Marluxia back in and tightened his end of the embrace. He began crying again.
"What's wrong?" Marluxia asked softly.
"Thank you," Zexion cried.
"For what?" Marluxia questioned.
"For...loving me," Zexion sniffled hesitantly.
Marluxia's nonexistent heart stopped. Zexion only clung to him tighter, grabbing the front folds of the assassin's coat and crying into his chest.
"Though," Zexion added with a stuffed up nose, "I must say. You have very bad taste if you love me." (this was a reference to Junjo Romantica lol)
"No," Marluxia laughed. "You're the sweetest, greatest, most intelligent guy I've ever met."
"I thought you were straight," Zexion said with a small laugh as they let one another go and sat back.
"I thought I was too...until I fell in love with you," Marluxia blushed.
Zexion blushed along with him as a knocking came to the door. Zexy stood and Marly quickly said, "Oh, by the way. Me and you are doing recon on the new world, the Isla de Muerta."
Zexion nodded and answered the door. Axel stood before him.
"You wanted to talk to me?" Axel asked.
/Until I saw you were back with Roxas/, he thought. "Yeah. Tell Larxene to tell Xemnas that Marly and I are on our way to the Isla de Muerta," Zexion said harshly and turned to Marluxia. "Let's go, Pinky."
Marluxia nodded as Zexion opened a Dark Corridor then followed him through, leaving Axel dumbstruck.
"What was that all about?" Marluxia demanded as they walked along the rocky shore of the new world.
"I can't be around him anymore," Zexion sighed as he turned to his best friend.
"Why not?" Marluxia wondered.
Zexion simply lifted his sleeve and Marluxia understood. The pink-headed assassin took the blue-haired illusionist in his arms.
"He doesn't realize how much he hurts me," Zexion cried.
"I love you, Zexion," Marluxia whispered. "Never forget that I'll always be here and I'll always love you, even past my death."
"I feel bad that I don't feel the same," Zexion sniffled.
Marluxia chuckled and let the schemer go. They continued walking, Zexion allowing Marluxia to hold his hand. Then, they were confronted by someone, or something, hidden in the shadows. Slowly, a sliver-haired teenager emerged to show he had on an Organization coat and a blindfold to match.
"Do we know you?" Marluxia asked, tightening his grip on Zexion's hand.
"I'm afraid not," the teenager said as he summoned a Keyblade. "The name's Riku."
Zexion then recognized him. Castle Oblivion. The basement floors. This was the boy who had a replica made of him. The one Zexion oh so thinly escaped. Just as Marluxia escaped Sora.
Riku began to strike, so Zexion summoned his Lexicon and Marluxia his Scythe and they shielded themselves.
"Nice to meet you," Marluxia growled. "I'm Marluxia."
"Nice to meet you too," Riku grinned evilly.
"Remember me?" Zexion snarled.
"Ah, Zexion," Riku smiled fiercely. "How nice to see you again. How is Repliku?"
"Gone," Zexion replied harshly.
Zexion muttered a spell, but Riku avoided it and went for Marluxia. Zexion pushed the shocked assassin out of the way and hit Riku with the Lexicon.
"Go Marluxia!" Zexion snarled.
"I won't leave you!" Marluxia cried.
"I don't want you to get hurt!" Zexion snapped as he looked for another spell.
Marluxia ran but, when Riku and Zexion weren't looking, hid behind a large rock. Zexion used a spell, but Riku deflected it and it hit the illusionist. Riku attacked. Zexion fell to the ground and Riku opened a Dark Corridor of his own. Marluxia sprinted to and fell to his knees at Zexion's side. Blood spilled and was soaking the Cloaked Schemer. Marly lifted Zexion enough to lay his blue-haired head in his lap.
"Zexion," Marluxia cried.
The schemer slowly lifted his hand and caressed the assassin's cheek.
"Better me than you," he said in a wispy voice.
"Don't leave me!" Marluxia sobbed. "I love you!"
"And...for that...I thank you, dear Marluxia," Zexion smiled. "Thank you...so much...for loving me."
And with that, Zexion's hand fell limply and he took his last breath.