"Why do you have those in your pocket?"
"I'm really sorry. For the first time, I don't know what to say." Tephira whispered as I shook my head.
"I don't expect you too." I replied honestly as I snuggled my cup of hot chocolate. I haven't talked to Bob since I made him leave three days ago. Despite the missed calls, ignoring the text messages, I couldn't bring myself to talk to him. Why should I? He did this, not me.
"Maybe you should talk to him. I don't know how much good it'll do, but I don't think he would intentionally hurt you like that." she put in while I grasped my cup a little tighter.
"If he didn't want to hurt me, then why would he do it in the first place?" I asked carefully while she looked at me before the ground.
"Exactly." I whispered inside my head. I heard my phone vibrate and I felt my stomach churn every time it would go off. I expected to see a call or message from Bob, but surprisingly it was from Gerard. I felt even worse. I've pretty much ignored everyone, for part of me was embarrassed of what happened. I could only imagine what they thought of us after all we've been through and then some.
Are you okay? it read as I pondered the thought. Was I okay? I didn't even know the meaning of okay anymore. I knew for certain I wasn't the same person I used to be. I even think I used up all my tears from the past couple nights. I reluctantly hit reply and type back.
I'm fine. I hit send and let it go through.
"You know this whole thing seems redundant. Four years ago, I left because I wanted to get away from stuff like this. And I still got sucked back into it." I say to her before I start to laugh. She smiles and nods while shrugging.
"It's just life...this whole world is fucked up." she replies as I nod.
"If I wasn't pregnant I'd ask you to take me out so I can forget my troubles, but I don't think that's possible." I added while poking my stomach.
"Well I'm more than sure a male police officer stripper would be happy to entertain you."
"I don't have singles." I smiled before standing up and putting my cup in the sink. I grabbed the trash bag inside the trash can and opened the door to toss it next to the wall, jumping when I saw Bob sitting there. I took a deep breath to relax my heart as he looked at me.
"What are you doing here?" I asked softly.
"I want to talk to you."
"About what?" I retorted.
"Everything." he replied while I reluctantly stood there before I nodded. He stood up and stretched his back while he followed me inside while Tephira looked up from her cell phone.
"Hey I found the strip- oh umm..." she trailed off nervously as I gave her a look.
"Oh look at that, The Office is coming on. Don't wanna miss it." she said nodding and grabbing her purse while looking at me nervously while I shook my head and waved her off. She shut the door behind her as I looked at him. He looked slightly cold, his eyes emotionless like always.
"I deserve to have you hate me right now I know that and I even hate myself too. I wouldn't have even talked to her if I knew what was going to happen." he spoke.
"What that you were going to end up in her bed at the end of the night?" I asked him coldly while he sighed.
"Tissa, I told you-"
"It doesn't matter!" I cut him off. "Don't you know by now what an awful person she is? The way she treats people and uses them?" I asked softly as he nodded. I felt my stomach get heavy as I looked at him.
"Do you still love her?" I whispered as he looked at me shocked.
"Do you love her?" I repeated.
"How could you say that?" he asked me curiously as I let out a sigh of frustration.
"If you didn't care about her, why would you even talk to her, much less end up at her place? I've watched you since we were in highschool Bob. No matter what she did, you always forgave her. She hurt you and you forgave her. She even cheated on you! Now she's hurting me again...are you gonna forgive her again? If you love her deep down, don't keep me on a string like this." I asked.
"I don't love her." he hissed. "If I loved her, would I have focused all my time onto you and my daughter? Meena and me have history, yes. Am I still sprung over it like a fucking lovesick teen? No. Because I love you. I chose you." he clarified as I shook my head.
"Yes I do. I even told her that when I left. She threw herself at me and I said no. Would I have been able to walk away so easily if I loved her?" he asked. "Our relationship...sucks. But I don't care what it is as long as I'm here with you. I don't want to hurt you and make you take one step forward and two steps back. I don't want to lose you when I just got you back." he added as I looked at him as my lip quivered slightly.
"This whole thing threw me off balance so much." I whispered. "I don't know if I can keep being sane this way. This is different this time Bob." I replied as he nodded.
"I know it is and my apologies don't make up for it. But I'll do whatever it takes to get us back to where we were. Cause I regret everything about last night. It's not her I wanted to be with. I wanted to be with you. Even if you don't believe me, at least believe that." he replied while I looked at him and nodded, could I believe that? I hated this roller coaster ride, when I was going to be able to get off it?
"I'm really trying to understand. But how could you not remember at least one thing about how you got there? Were you drinking?" I asked carefully. He looked down before nodding.
"Yes, but it was only a few beers. It wasn't enough to get me completely wasted. But the more I thought about it, I didn't feel right when I left her house. It wasn't a hangover feeling, I don't know how to describe it." he told me honestly as I sighed.
"That doesn't sound very promising." I replied while he held his hands out.
"I don't know what to tell you."
"You could at least-" I was going to reply before I heard a knock at the door. I rolled my eyes and watched him as he sighed in annoyance while I went to get it.
"Look, this isn't a- Mikey?" I asked utterly shocked as he stood there with a nervous smile and made a nervous laugh.
"H-hey." he waved.
"What are you doing here?" I asked curiously. He looked around then back at me.
"Umm...there's something you should know. Is Bob here?" he asked as I nodded and had him come in. Great, what else did I need on this shit sundae. Mikey greeted Bob who exchanged the same surprised reaction as I did while we went back to the living room.
"What's going on?" Bob asked as Mikey held up Bob's jacket.
"You left this in Gee's car." he replied as he handed Bob the jacket.
"Oh thanks, is that what-"
"This was inside the pockets." Mikey cut him off as he held a baggy with two small round pills. I observed it with confusion.
"It looks like aspirin?" I asked as he shook his head at me. Bob looked at it before he suddenly slammed his fist on the couch.
"What?" I asked him worriedly as he growled under his breath.
"Those aren't aspirin. Those are fucking roofies." he replied.
"Roofies? Why do you have those in your pocket?" I asked again, not understanding what was going on.
"The bitch drugged him." Mikey finished as I widened my eyes as Bob shook his head.
"Drugged you?" I asked him.
"Fucking hell, I didn't think she was this bad." Bob muttered as I rolled my eyes.
"I did." I scoffed as he glared at me while I looked away.
"So she drugged me and that's why I blacked out." Bob finalized as Mikey nodded.
"What I don't understand is why would she only use roofies?" he asked.
"What do you mean?"
"Well that just seems a little childish if she wanted you back." he replied.
"Unless she knew you'd say no. So she figured if she drugged you...she'd have leverage against you."
"Leverage for what?" Bob asked again confused I shook my head.
"So it would get back to me."
"She's not done yet. I can feel it."