Anakin teaches Ahsoka a different kind of lesson.
“Master,” she said. “Is something wrong?”
“No, no,” replied Anakin with a smile, gesturing for her to remaing seated as she started to rise from her asana. He crossed the small room, the door closing behind him with a hiss, and sat down on the floor beside his Padawan. “I just wanted to talk to you, that’s all.”
“O-okay,” Ahsoka said slowly. Anakin was acting strange, almost sheepish, not at all his usual swaggering self.
“Does the war get to you?” he asked after studying her face for a few seconds.
“I — I don’t understand, Master.”
“Well, all that constant fighting, and killing, and destruction — does it not affect you? Exhaust you emotionally? Don’t you want to escape it sometimes?”
“Well…” said Ahsoka, shifting uncomfortably. She had no idea where her Master was going with this. “Well, of course, it affects me. I mean, nobody likes war. It’s horrible. But we have our Jedi training and the Force on our side, don’t we? There is no emotion, there is peace. That’s what we are taught, isn’t it? Like, the Force is there for you no matter what happens. It’s a source of comfort you can always draw upon.”
“Oh, yes. The Force,” said Anakin with a cryptic little smile. “Yes, of course, you can always lose yourself in the Force and forget all your troubles…but it’s kind of impersonal, don’t you think? It lacks…humanity. You gain peace, but at the price of surrendering your own self.”
“Well…yeah,” Ahsoka replied cautiously, wondering if her Master was trying to teach her some kind of lesson. “That’s kind of the point of the Force, isn’t it? Of being a Jedi? That you let it flow through you and guide your actions, not use it for selfish ends, because that leads to the Dark Side and — ”
“You are so beautiful, Ahsoka,” said Anakin and kissed her on the mouth, cupping the back of her head with his hand.
The Togruta froze. Nothing in her lifetime of Jedi training had prepared her for this, and all she felt was shock. The same couldn’t be said about Anakin, who had already been with a woman more than once. Ever since his first time he had found the company of the Force insufficient. A union with the Force, while immensely satisfying in its own way, was too passive. You couldn’t touch the Force, or talk to it, or look it in the eye. You just let it fill you. This was fine with Anakin, as long as he got to fill someone himself from time to time, and therein lay the problem. It had been ages since he’d last seen Padmé, and the frustration had become unbearable. Meditation didn’t bring him peace anymore, and there was no reprieve in sight. It was then that he started seeing his Padawan in a new light. He had always thought she was cute, but in a detached sort of way. His heart belonged to Padmé, after all. Or so he had thought until recently. Until he started noticing the way Ahsoka’s skin gleamed in the sunlight when she was sweating. Until his heart acquired the habit of skipping a beat whenever he heard her laugh. Until he started catching himself at looking for an excuse to touch her. He didn’t need excuses anymore. He slid his hand down Ahsoka’s back, marveling at how smooth her skin was. Having spent his childhood on a planet where most surfaces were hard and coarse, Anakin could never get enough of the opposite. Padmé’s skin had actually played a major part in his attraction to her, but even Padmé couldn’t compare to Ahsoka. Padmé was already in her late twenties and starting to show signs of wear, while Ahsoka, who was barely fifteen, was like a ripe peach. Anakin revelled in the sensation of her bare flesh beneath his hand while he sucked on her plump upper lip. Truly, the girl was a gift from the Force itself. What a blind fool he had been, denying himself the pleasure of female company for the sake of a woman that, now that he thought about it, he barely even knew, while all that time such an amazing creature had been at his side — a fellow Jedi, a good friend, and an elfin little minx. But he was going to make up for that now, oh, yes. Now —
“Stop!” exclaimed Ahsoka, finally pulling away from the kiss. She was staring at him like she’d never seen him before. “Master, what are you doing?!”
“Oh, Snips,” said Anakin, pulling himself even closer to his Padawan, “isn’t it obvious?”
“But, but,” she spluttered, “that’s against the Code!”
“Wouldn’t be the first time we’ve broken the rules, Snips,” Anakin said softly, tracing her jawline with his finger.
“Not like this!” she protested, shaking her head, her eyes wide as saucers. “This…this is insane!”
“Ahsoka,” said Anakin, pressing himself against her as she tried to lean away from him, “I need you. I need you so much. I’m sick of this damn war. I’ve been fighting for so long that I’m beginning to forget what it is I’m fighting for. I need a reminder that there are other things in life, good things, and I’m not talking about the Force. Believe me, it’s not a replacement for what two living beings can share with each other.”
“Master…please…” pleaded Ahsoka, pressing a hand against his chest in an attempt to restrain him.
“Just lie down, Snips,” said Anakin. “Trust me and lie down.”
His voice was gentle, but Ahsoka thought she saw the hint of a threat in his eyes. His aura felt weird, too; there was an unfamiliar, disturbing tinge to it, like a dark presence lurking just out of sight. Ahsoka decided it was best to comply.
“That’s my girl,” said Anakin with a smile as she lowered herself onto the floor, uncrossing her legs. He bent down and started kissing her neck and sucking on her delicate collarbones. Ahsoka was trembling slightly. He could sense her fear, but also her excitement. He had awakened her young body’s instincts that all the Jedi indoctrination had been unable to eradicate.
“Don’t be scared of the new sensations,” he whispered in her ear. “Don’t fight them. Trust me.”
“Master, this is wrong,” she panted.
“Then why does it feel so right?” he asked, raising his head and meeting the gaze of her big naïve eyes. “Why, Snips?”
She opened her mouth, but couldn’t seem to come up with an answer.
“Ahsoka, you’ve been my Padawan for a long time now,” said Anakin. “Tell me, am I a bad Jedi? Do I have a poor command of the Force? Is my skill with a lightsaber substandard?”
“No!” she said. “No, of course not! You are a great Jedi, you know that — ”
“And I am at least a decent lover,” he interrupted with a mischievous half-smile. “Don’t you see, Snips? One doesn’t preclude the other. The Code is wrong, Ahsoka.”
She stared at him in shock. He chuckled.
“All right, I take that back. It is not wrong, but, like all sets of rules, it was written for the weakest. Those who cannot control themselves and have to be told what to do.”
“That’s an…interesting point of view,” said Ahsoka, hoping to keep Anakin talking.
“Chancellor Palpatine told me that. He is a great mentor, as wise as any Jedi Master. I owe a great deal to him.” — He brought his face even closer to hers. — “I am not weak, Ahsoka. Neither are you. You are going to be a great Jedi, I know that. There is no harm for us in this. Think of it as another lesson.”
“Master — ” she began, but Anakin cut her off with another kiss on the mouth. He pushed up her top with his right hand, exposing her small round breasts, and proceeded to suck on the most delectable nipples his mouth had ever known (not that it had known that many). Ahsoka moaned softly. He could sense that she was still scared and confused, but that was okay. It was her first time, after all. The next time it would be pure pleasure for both of them. He sat up and pulled off his tunic, tossing it aside. He took a moment to enjoy the sight of his prone Padawan — so young, so vulnerable, and so his. He had never felt that way with Padmé, who liked to take charge even in bed. Not Ahsoka. She was headstrong, but she always obeyed her Master when it mattered. Anakin sank down on top of her, pressing his naked torso against hers. She inhaled sharply at the contact.
“Don’t fight your sensations, my young apprentice,” he murmured. “Give in to them. Trust your body.”
Ahsoka seemed to relax a little. Anakin started to kiss her face and neck again, grinding his naked upper body against hers. Yes, this was it, this was exactly what he needed. At last, he was beginning to feel whole again, his body almost thrumming with energy. The foolish Jedi didn’t even know what they were missing. Ahsoka was lucky to have been assigned to such a consummate adept. Oh, the things he would teach her. His hand glided slowly up her thigh, higher and higher, until it went underneath her skirt and right between her —
“Master, please!” exclaimed Ahsoka, grabbing his wrist. She was trembling again. “Please…don’t.”
Anger flared up in Anakin, and he almost threw off her hand, but then he saw her pleading eyes and sensed her fear, and the anger subsided. Taking a deep breath, he withdrew his hand from under Ahsoka’s skirt and stroked her cheek instead.
“All right, Snips,” he said with a smile. “All right. No need to rush things. Let’s leave this for the next lesson. But you’re going to have to help me out a little, okay?”
“H-help you out?”
Pushing himself up a little, Anakin took hold of Ahsoka’s hand and guided it to the bulge in his crotch. She frowned in confusion as her palm pressed against it.
“Why are you keeping your lightsaber in your pants — oh!”
Anakin snorted, and even Ahsoka let out a surprised giggle. Wide-eyed, she slid her hand down the concealed shaft. Anakin hissed.
“Yes, Snips, that’s it,” he said in a shaky voice, his eyes half-closed. “Keep doing that.”
She hesitated for a second, then started stroking Anakin’s penis through the fabric of his pants. He shuddered, letting out a shaky breath. Ahsoka kept going, observing her Master’s reactions in amazement. She had never seen him so…vulnerable. In a strange twist, their roles had been reversed. Now it was she who was in control, playing him like a musical instrument. It was rather…fun. She experimented with tempo and different grips to see how Anakin would react, realizing as she did so that she had always wanted this, always wanted to have her Master in her power, wanted him to obey her for a change. The knowledge disturbed her. A Jedi was not supposed to seek power. Then again, a Jedi wasn’t supposed to have sex, and her Master had apparently done that more than once without any ill effects, so what did she know?
“A-aaaaaargh!” groaned Anakin, his body arching spasmodically. The Force echo of his climax hit Ahsoka like a shockwave, and she shuddered. This was indeed unlike anything she had ever experienced. Anakin went completely rigid for a few seconds, his mouth open in a silent scream; then he exhaled with a shudder and sank down onto the floor beside her. For a minute he simply lay on his back with his eyes closed, breathing deeply. Ahsoka wasn’t sure what to do.
“Come here, Snips,” he said finally, turning his head toward her.
She climbed on top of Anakin, and he wrapped an arm around her. For a while they lay there in silence, looking at each other.
“What is it?” Anakin asked finally.
“You are looking at me like I’ve grown a third eye.”
“You look…happy,” she said, frowning. “I’ve never seen you look happy before. Cheerful, triumphant, smug, enthusiastic, yes, but not happy.”
“I am happy, Snips,” he replied, stroking her right head-tail. “Thanks to you. Do you see what I mean now? This is something no amount of meditation will get you.”
She looked away.
“You are still feeling uncomfortable, I see,” he said. “That’s all right. Learning new things always takes us out of our comfort zone. It’s how we grow.” — He sat up, propping himself on an elbow and bringing his face close to hers. — “Ahsoka, it was the Force that brought us together, I’m sure of it now. You are like me, unafraid to push the boundaries. We are meant to be more than just another Jedi and his Padawan. We will achieve great things together. Nothing can stand in the way of our love.”
She smiled self-consciously as he kissed her on the cheek.
“I have to go now,” Anakin said, gently dislodging her and standing up. He summoned his discarded tunic using the Force and put it back on. “Think about what you have learned today, Ahsoka. If you have any questions, I’ll be happy to answer them. Just don’t mention this to anybody else, okay? I don’t think our prim and proper Obi-Wan would be delighted if he found out.”
Ahsoka nodded, also standing up and pulling her top down over her breasts. Anakin gave her another kiss on the cheek and left. The Togruta went to her bunk and sat down, gripping her head with both hands. “Think about what you have learned,” her Master had said. She didn’t know what to think. She had never been so overwhelmed in her life. Until that night her world had been simple; she had either liked things, disliked them, or not cared about them. She couldn’t honestly say that she had liked her experience with Anakin, and she couldn’t honestly say that she had not. There wasn’t a word for how she felt about it. Ahsoka sighed. Think about what you have learned. Well, she had learned that she didn’t know her Master as well as she had believed. Or herself, for that matter. Anakin had been kind of scary and menacing, but also tender and vulnerable, and she had discovered sensations that she hadn’t known she had the capacity for, as well as a domineering streak that went beyond being cheeky and headstrong. Such emotions…such desires…she had always been taught that things like that led to the Dark Side, and she was pretty sure she had felt the presence of the Dark Side, but her Master had assured her that he had it under control, and it seemed that he did… What Ahsoka desperately needed was the counsel of another Jedi, someone like Master Kenobi, but Anakin had forbidden her to speak to anybody, and she could see why. If this got out, Anakin would most likely be expelled from the Order; maybe she as well. She couldn’t betray her Master, that much she was certain about. And that didn’t really leave her any choice, did it? Maybe the two of them were really destined for greatness, as Anakin had said, or maybe they were destined for damnation, but either way, they would share the same fate.
Two weeks later…
Obi-Wan Kenobi entered the bridge of the Fist of the Chancellor and smiled as he saw Anakin and his Padawan waiting for him. It had been over a month since they had last met, and now war had finally brought them together once again for an assault on an important Separatist stronghold.
“Anakin. Ahsoka,” he said, walking up to them. “So good to see you again.”
“It’s good to see you, too, Master Kenobi,” replied Ahsoka with a nod. Obi-Wan’s eyebrow rose a fraction. The Togruta sounded different, more mature somehow. Her aura felt different, too — more powerful and more…”shielded” was probably the best term. Obi-Wan saw her exchange a quick look with Anakin, as if they were sharing a private joke, and it struck him how much alike the two of them had become — the mark of a strong bond, the kind that Obi-Wan himself had never been able to establish with his former Padawan. Anakin had turned out to be a great teacher, something that Obi-Wan would never have expected of him. As they started discussing the coming assault, he made a mental note to himself to tell Anakin how proud of him he was.