Dumbledore calls Aaron Hotchner in to ask about the behavior of one of his teachers.
Note: I do not own Harry Potter or Criminal Minds or any of their characters. And yes, I know this is very silly and no I am not serious. Takes place during the third book when Snape was all paranoid about Lupin helping Black (behavior sort of exaggerated though…).It was just something I was thinking up while reading HP crossovers because Hotch and James look sort of alike.
Aaron Hotchner looked around the room into which he'd been shown with more than a little curiosity. Every once in a while the BAU would be called upon to profile a "dark wizard", when all magical means of identifying him or her had failed so it wasn't the first time he had been inside a wizarding office. However, that of Albus Dumbledore never ceased to interest him. It was much like the man himself in a way. Mostly it was full of toys, plush chairs, and cheerful, almost feminine, décor. Here and there, though, lay objects that gave off a feeling of foreboding. A bloodstained diary, a statue of a snake, a cracked ring. And a red bird that Hotch couldn't quite make up his mind about. Reid would have had a field day going over each and every centimeter with a fine-toothed comb and trying to decide what all of it meant but Hotch had long since stopped trying to profile the Headmaster. The moment he'd finished the man did something to contradict what Hotch had decided so what was the point? Anyway, he wasn't here to profile Dumbledore.
Actually, he had no idea who he was supposed to profile. The Headmaster had sent him an Owl saying merely that it was urgent and that a stern-faced woman named Professor McGonagall would meet him outside the BAU building and bring him to Hogwarts. Things had happened as planned and on arrival at the school he was shown up to the Headmaster's office and told to wait. That had been nearly ten minutes ago and while he had nothing planned for the rest of the day, Hotchner was beginning to get irritated that he was being kept waiting. He was here as a favor after all. He had no obligation to England or the Wizarding world. He was about to pull out his phone and see if the team had any cases when the door banged open and a pale man with long, dark hair burst into the room.
"Headmaster, you wanted to see me? I'm-" his eyes fell on Hotch and narrowed. "You!" he hissed.
"Excuse me?" Hotch said, raising his eyebrows.
"I knew it! I knew there was something going on here!" the man began to pace. "Of course I thought it just involved the werewolf and your little mutt but I should have realized you'd be involved as well!"
"I'm sorry, sir I think there must be a mistake. I-"
The man paid him know heed and just continued his rant "- but of course how could I have guessed that you'd be intelligent enough to fake your own death in order to make a grand return and gain fame as the only wizard to ever fully come back to life and-" at this point Hotch started reaching for his gun but was stopped by a wand suddenly being pointed directly at his face. "Watch it, Potter!" the man shouted.
"Sir, my name is SSA Aaron Hotchner and I-"
"Oh is that what you're calling yourself now? And I suppose the SSA stands for Super Special Animagus, does it?" the man sneered. "Oh don't think I didn't know!" he continued, "I followed the four of you around for years! I was bound to find out sometime or other. You weren't all that good at hiding it. Not exactly the brightest student. Although I must admit that I didn't think you'd be smart enough to fake your own death. Must have had Lupin's help, eh?"
Once again Aaron tried to reason with him. "I've never met you before in my life. My name is-"
"DON'T LIE TO ME, POTTER!" the man shrieked. "I KNOW WHO YOU ARE!"
Hotch took the opportunity to whip out his gun. "Sir, drop the wand. I can shoot faster than you can talk." He wasn't at all sure this would work but he had to try something.
"And what's that?" the man sneered. "Resorted to using Muggle weapons eh, Potter? Well you should know that those won't do you much good here." The man began an incantation but was cut off by a loud voice.
"SEVERUS THAT IS ENOUGH!" Finally Dumbledore had arrived.
"Headmaster!" the man, Severus, exclaimed excitedly. "I told you that something was up and I was right! You see? It's Potter and- hey!" His wand flew from his hand.
"Severus," the Headmaster said quietly. "I will deal with this. I must ask you to go see Madam Pomfrey."
"Now, Severus!" Dumbledore said raising his voice slightly.
Severus looked slightly put out but cast a triumphant glance over his shoulder as he left the room whispering, "Try getting out of this one!"
Only after the door closed did Hotch put away his weapon. "What was that about?" he asked.
Dumbledore sighed. "That was Professor Snape the potions master. I'm afraid you bear a certain resemblance to his late rival."
"So much that he thinks I'm him returned from the dead?" Hotch asked incredulously.
"He is actually the reason I called you here. He has been acting increasingly erratic lately and I would like your opinion on…"