frank talks, finds out stuff and runs...far..far away
they wanted to know about me. what could i tell them? 'hi i'm frank and i cut myself cause my parents beat the shit out of me' isn't a good way to start off a friendship. i started to think deeply when suddenly a pair of long thick fingers appeared infront of my face and snapped before bringing me back into reality.
"umm...dude. you okay?" mikey asked before shooting me a concerned look. i smiled and nodded even though i was broken inside.
"i'm fine! theres just not much to tell about me. i have no brothers or sisters and i live with my parents. i play guitar and have a few tats on my body. i guess thats it!" i grinned maybe just a bit to enthusiastically and showed them my tattoos. i hoped they didn't see through my lies.
"kool dude, so kool." megan smiled before fiddling with rays afro. i smiled.
"are you two..." i laughed as i pointed to them. they blushed and nodded.
"yeah, we are." ray smirked before kissing megans cheek. how sweet, now if ray was gerard and megan was me...now that i could enjoy.
"so who else is...y'know...together?" i asked with a smile. mikey held abi close and smiled. i smiled back, they did look cute together.
"thats it. me, bob gee and jazz are single though jazz and gee did have a thing." kat laughed and earned evil stares from both jazz and gerard. i couldn't help but sigh to myself. gee was straight...knew it. i wished someone would love me, but i knew that wasn't possible. i felt a tear run down my cheek. kat turned and looked at me, so did everyone else.
"whats up frankie?" gerard asked with concern tainting his voice.
"oh, i was just thinking...it's nice to see some people have love." i replyed, my voice was flat and emotionless with a little longing in it. i wanted to feel loved.
"aww frankie!" the girls smiled before jumping on me and pushing me to the ground. we were all giggling and then ray decided it would be fun to join in, and bob too! we all rolled around on the floor with rays afro tickling my chin. all of us apart from gerard. we stopped and sat back down with half hearted smiles. i looked at gerard and laughed. he grinned. mikey stood up and sat next to me and smiled.
"Lets play question time! i'll ask you questions and you've gotta tell me the answers!" mikey smiled and everyone luaghed in agreement. i nodded and shoved mikey playfully.
"hmm..okay! LET THE QUESTION ASKING BEGIN, full name?" mikey grinned.
"franklin anthony iero, junior."
"mines badass, halloween!"
"guys or girls"
i ducked my head in shame and i felt all eyes on me, the pupils burning holes into my hoody. i could feel the homophobia radiating off of everyones bodies. i lifted my head and saw a massive grin spread across mikeys face.
"w-what?" i asked. he smiled wider.
"gerards gay too!!!" mikey beamed. gerard's book found it's way to mikeys head with the aid of gerards hand. i wanted to laugh but i couldn't. my mind was still processing what mikey had said. gerards gay too? he was probally messing with me.
"is that true?" i asked gerard. he blushed and nodded. my heart skipped a beat.
"y-yeah...but please don't spread it! people think i'm gay...but if they found out i actually was...look frankie...i don't want to die!" gerard pleaded with a sweet childish voice before laughing. i laughed too. maybe...just maybe i had a shot with gerard. who was i kidding. he was the hottest guy on the planet and i...i was just frank iero. unwanted. unloved. after the laughing died down there was an akward silence. i hugged my knees and sighed.
"so...lets change the subject then!" abi smiled as she snuggled into mikey. we all nodded in agreement.
"hey guys! did you see that bloke on the roof earlier? sucidal freak!" bob grinned. kat and gerard stared at me and shot me a look of concern. i felt my stomach twist violently as low chuckles were exchanged. i needed to get out of there. i needed to be alone. i grabbed my bag and ran, ran faster than i ever had in my life. past the school. past the roads. past my house. i didn't know where i was going but i was sure i wasn't coming back.
everyone chuckled at bobs remark except for me, kat and frank. i looked at frank and saw pain behind his golden eyes. it made me shiver. suddenly frank shot up, grabbed his bag and ran. ran faster than humanly possible. the sort of running you only did when you needed to get away fast. i watched him run out of the school gates and out of my life. kat stood up and grabbed me tight.
"GERARD ARTHUR WAY, WE NEED TO GET HIM NOW!" she screamed at me. kat only screamed when she was either A. extremely worried or B. when ray steals something of hers and hides it in his fro. i stood up and got ready to run after him when bob pulled me to face him.
"dude...whats wrong with frank..." he asked with concern. my heart twisted as i tried to find the words to explain.
"b-bob...that was frank on the roof." i muttered, barely audioble. everyone gasped and shot to their feet.
"oh my fucking god...i didn't mean that....i really didn't.. aaawww shit!" bob started to panick. jazz hit him over the head and told him to get a grip. she was right. we ran out of the school gates and over the roads. frankie was nowhere to be seen.
i ran to the park and sat on the edge of the pond. i was feeding the ducks my sandwich and they thanked me with thier strange duck noises. i giggled. ducks don't judge you. i chucked the rest of my sandwich in the pond and watched a pair of ducks fight over it. it was very cold, almost artic conditions. perfect conditions for suicide. i sighed and re-thought my last thought. suicide. was i really thinking of ending my life...again. i mean i finally found something to live for...but was it enough? i threw my bag down and screamed.
"IT'S NOT ENOUGH!" i cried out onto the open pond. the ducks flew off and left a waterloged sandwich floating in the centre of the pond. i buried my head into my knees and started to cry and then i remembered...i had a backup razor in my bag. i fumbled over my bag and reached into the secret pocket i had created for this very situation. i wasn't going to kill myself...just cut myself enough not to feel any pain but just blood flowing freely from my arm. i grasped the razor in my hand and started to pull up the sleeves on my hoodie. then i plunged the razor into my arm, just above the elbow crease. i watched the blood flow from the wound and cut more. i started to think as well.
sucidal freak!!! emo faggot disgusting child
the thoughts ran through my brain and then i yelped in pain.
"AAH FUCK!" i screamed. sub conciously i had cut so deep into my arm i had hit an artery. i watched the blood flow from the wound. deep crimson waters flowing the the earth. i started to feel faint. i pulled my misfits hoodie over my arms to hide the cut and i started to cry for help.
"He-HELP!" i screamed into the distance. i saw mist covering the green fields that surrounded the ponds.
"HELP!" i screamed again. nothing. i felt my eyelids grow heavy and i tried one last time.
"S-Save Me....from myself." i cried but i whispered the last bit. i saw a group of people running towards me.
"FRANK!" one of them screamed. and then...well then...i saw darkness.
you like? i promise it will get better... i have a plan...sort of ;)
please R&R and i love you guys... have cookies !!!
next part up either today or tommorrow xx