Not an update.
(#) SkittlesObsessions 2011-04-05 02:28:34 PMWow this really hit close to home with me. I have esteem issues too, and I also take what people say to me to the heart, even if they're criticizing me in a nice way. I've had people say fucked up things to me as well, hurts even more when it's from a dude...I'm a sensitive little flower, people are assholes sometimes. I've become a bitch now because I like to be alone and can't stand people. I'm 'anti-social' because I don't hang around with stupid people. It sucks. I have major insecurities when I'm around people anyways, it's no good.
I'm also terrible at math, so I feel your pain. I frustrate the hell out of my teacher because I always lag on the homework because I don't know how to do it.
And the cherry of it all, I'm also diabetic. Type 2, even though I'm pretty sure I'm type 1 since I had most of the symptoms. I hate admitting it because people treat me like a child or they want to watch me inject my insulin like I'm doing heroin or something :/ I think this also has a lot to do with my insecurities for much personal reasons.
It's a rough patch, but you got accepted to Berkeley! You'll always have that over the people who are shitheads (:
thanks for expressing yourself and giving me hope that I'm not alone on certain things.
(#) DeathCookie 2011-04-05 03:31:55 PMAT THE MOMENT, I DON'T GIVE THREE SHITS HOW "CORRECT" THIS IS BY GRAMMAR STANDARS: I always feel like such a hypocrite by saying: "don't listen to what they say, YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL" because who am I to preach that? I don't believe it myself, so who am I to tell other girls that they're stupid for not seeing how gorgeous they are. Here in America the "plus size" section already applies to you - even if you're a size 7! What the hell? My pants size ranges from 9-11, and I never really thought it was that bad, but magazines make it seem like it's a curse if you aren't a size 0. My friend (who is a size 0) was telling me the other day how she was "soo fat". I got fed up, like WTF if she's fat, I'm a fucking mammoth. So, I threw away my lunch - not because I wasn't hungry, but because society expects me to only eat 250 calories a day to meet model like standards. Things is, I always break down and stuff my face food afterwards. Why? Because I'm sad that I'm not as pretty as my friends, because I'm bored and there's no one to talk to - and the list goes on. They call it "emotional" eating, but last time I checked everyone had emotions (except maybe Mikey..huh maybe that's why he's so thin)..I just sit in front of the mirror a lot, looking at myself with utter disgust...Le'sigh. I'm glad Mad World really means a lot to you, it is a rockin' song..Anyway I'm gonna go puke or something...
IF FUCKWAD DOESN'T POST MEH FULL REVIEW IMMA GO KILL A BITCH.
(#) ShannonThePirate 2011-04-06 09:58:34 AMAwwh, i hope you do feel better soon, there is so much people out there who love you, for breaking your straight edge-ness: you were realy depressed and down, it's okay to do that if you think it will make you feel better (: you can go back to being sXe when you're feeling okay (: and always remember:
"don't listen to those who tell you you're not good enough. You are too good! ..INSERT.PIECE.OF.QUOTE.THAT.I.CAN'T.REMEMBER.HERE.. You are beautiful!" ~ Gerard Way
i honestly hope you feel better soon, i send you my love. (:
(#) Kill_the_mainstream 2011-04-07 03:41:36 AMI'm so sorry...
First of all, I'm sorry that I haven't reviewed your last couple chapters and author's notes like I usually do . I've been on "vacation" (more like forced participation) in the Philippines since April 1 and won't be back until Sunday. There isn't any wireless internet and I have to write this quickly because we all have to share this internet box-thingy. (My mom thinks I like it here, but honestly it is a living hell. No running water, no wireless internet, bugs EVERYWHERE. Damn, I sound like a spoiled bitch... Sorry)
Secondly, I'm sorry that the world has to be such a fucking mess. Life is tough and, hey! No one gets out alive anyway! We just have to stay strong with the things we believe in because it is the only way to stay sane.
Breaking Edge is nothing to be proud of, but there are worse things in the world. Don't hate yourself over it. You just have to walk the path of true change, and hold your convictions to the grave! (Yeah, I totally just quoted Strife. What you gonna do about it? ;) ) We are damn proud to be Striaght Edge and nothing can change that! Atleast you have been making an effort to prevent yourself from contaminating your body. Most people just don't care about keeping their body in control and fall prey to society's vices. You, however, are still in control and should be fucking proud of yourself =)
“People who cease to believe in God or goodness altogether still believe in the devil. I don't know why. No, I do indeed know why. Evil is always possible. And goodness is eternally difficult.”
"I walk the path of true change, commitment sworn in the name of those who walk the Straight Edge, Convictions held to my grave."
"...Monsters are real, and ghosts are real too. They live inside us, and sometimes, they win..."
“If for one minute you think you're better than a sixteen year old girl in a Green Day t-shirt, you are sorely mistaken. Remember the first time you went to a show and saw your favorite band. You wore their shirt, and sang every word. You didn't know anything about scene politics, haircuts, or what was cool. All you knew was that this music made you feel different from anyone you shared a locker with. Someone finally understood you. This is what music is about.”
-Gerard Way (I don't know what this one has to do with anything, but it just made me feel better. What about you?)
You are special. No, you are very special! You may be feeling down, but eventually the dark clouds will pass and you will see the light. You are an amazing author and a phenominal friend, so I don't see any reason for you to deserve any kind of bad thoughts or feelings.
I shall continue to be the regular reader and reviewer that I should be!
Recomended listening: You're Gonna Go Far Kid by The Offspring
Recomended reading: http://www.mychemicalromance.com/blog/xmydearmotherwarx/society-suicide-and-puppets