Gerard, Bandit, and Frank enjoy a nice day out. Still, Gerard feels haunted.
Also I wanted to take note that the store I mentioned in this chapter is a real place. So, if you're a Harry Potter fan who lives in California, you might wanna give them a visit. They're pretty cool. Dunno if they'd really let you play with their stuff though. XD
Here's their website: http://www.whimsicalley.com/
Anyway, hope you enjoy. :3
Chapter Seven: Illusive Consensus
A rattled Gerard sat on the floor in a corner of Bandit's bedroom, cross legged, with his laptop. Bandit was still asleep. It was about 5 AM, and Gerard was feeling too disturbed to sleep. He experienced a dream, no, a nightmare --- nay, a night terror that had caused him to awaken, screaming in a cold sweat. He didn't remember the details all that well, but he had the image of his baby, slaughtered and mangled, imprinted in his mind. Gerard had immediately dashed over to Bandit's room, just for the peace of mind that she was okay. Now he couldn't bring himself to leave. He found himself glancing over in Bandit's direction constantly. He spent his time going through pictures on his laptop of he and Lindsey from one of their trips to Universal Studios Orlando back when they were dating. Gerard was often very prone to nightmares, and Lindsey was always the one who would comfort him afterwards, she had always been there to make him feel safe again. She would make him some warm milk, stroke his hair, wrap him in her arms until he was ready to fall asleep once more.
Now there was no one.
Gerard wondered how she was doing. Wondered if this was as hard for her as it was for him. It had been the most painful thing, turning his back on her when they last spoke. It had taken every bit of his willpower to not say I love you back. He wanted to say it because it was what he was supposed to say, yet he wasn't sure if he'd be lying to her if he did. He had gone home and cried after.
Did he still love her? While he was still angry at her, Gerard also knew these things just don't die overnight. Lindsey had been his best friend and life partner for so many years. She was who made him feel complete at last. He wondered if she missed them at all. Because god knows he missed her.
Or at least, the person she used to be.
He continued to contemplate when it hit around 6 AM, and he heard a voice. Frank's voice. It sounded as though he were talking to someone on the phone. The guest room was right next to Bandit's room, so Gerard could make out words pretty clearly by just leaning his head against the wall.
"...I'm doing great at Gerard's......yeah he made this rice dish tonight, it was fucking beast.... he does seem a little down....I don't wanna make him feel uncomfortable if he doesn't wanna talk about it....me? I'm fine....can we not talk about this?.....how does that make me a hypocrite?....couples counseling? With Jamia? Are you fucking crazy?....because she's just going to make it more than it is.... there's nothing to say about it! It was an affair, and now we're over...."
An affair? Gerard nearly let out an audible gasp and he covered his mouth with his hand quickly. Jamia had cheated on Frankie? Gerard felt his blood boil, and a hot rage flashed over him for a moment. How fucking dare she! How dare she hurt his Frankie, after all he's done for her? After how good he's been to her? He was Frank fucking Iero for god sakes, he could have women far more attractive than she, but year after year, Gerard has watched Frank continue to be faithful to Jamia, and this is how she repays him? Gerard had the right mind to call Jamia up right then and there and give her the yelling of her life.
Oh, and poor Frankie! Gerard frowned. He immediately went about plotting ways he could make Frank feel better. He, after all, knew all too well how much it hurt to be losing the love of your life.
"Get your coat on, we're going downtown!",Gerard yelled into up the stair case at the guest bedroom. He helped Bandit button up her pink cashmere sweater, and he put a matching pink sun hat on her head.
“For what?”, Frank yelled back at him.
“I wanna go shopping!” Gerard answered.
“Oh lord…”, he heard Frank mutter.
“Daddy, ice cweam afta?”, Bandit asked Gerard hopefully.
Gerard smiled, leaned in, and said in a hushed voice, “We’ll get some after we’re done shopping but don’t tell Uncle Frank, it’s a surprise.”
Gerard put a finger up to his lips and nose and made a “shh” noise to indicate a secret, and Bandit imitated him after as though to show she understood.
Once everyone was in the car, they drove off into the city. Gerard weaved through the horrid LA traffic for what felt like an hour, with both Bandit and Frank whining impatiently at him the whole way through. Finally, they arrived at their destination. A small little shop had the sign "Whimsic Alley" over it. Frank cocked his head curiously, and Bandit squealed happily. It seemed she knew where they were, and was quite pleased about it. He followed Gerard and Bandit into the store.
"Holy shit, no way!", Frank gaped.
At first, he thought he had walked into some sort of Halloween store. He then realized it was a store full of nothing but Harry Potter goodies: Hogwarts robes and hats, wizard candies, professionally crafted wands, porcelain models of characters, and so on. Bandit immediately wanted to touch everything in sight. Frank automatically went for the Gryffindor items, and Gerard reached for anything Slytherin. They tried on everything they possibly could. Gerard flaunted around in a Slytherin scarf that Frank said he looked fabulous in, and Gee fit Frank into all sorts of different hats. Frank skimmed through all the Harry Potter analogy books, and Bandit showed Gerard all the stuffed toys she wanted him to buy her. Frank and Gerard started eyeing the robes, both of them pressing a robe to themselves and asking each other how they looked.
"We'd make fucking awesome wizards.", Frank laughed.
"Hell yeah, you, me, Mikey, and Ray -- we'd be like, the marauders. But cooler than those guys!", Gerard chuckled.
"You'd be the devilishly handsome James.", Frank smirked.
"And you, obviously Sirius.", Gerard grinned.
"Ray would be.....", Frank thought.
"Lupin.", they said together.
"...Does that mean Mikey is Pettigrew?", Frank snorted.
Gerard doubled over laughing, "Yeah I guess he is! We'll have to tell him that..."
Gerard saw Frank flinch when he looked at the price tag of the robes. His face fell a little. Gerard quickly snatched the robe from his hand and walked past him over to the cashier.
"Gerard what are you doing?", Frank followed him.
"Buying them, silly!", Gerard replied.
"Gerard...", Frank lowered the volume of his voice, ".... they're a bit pricey."
"You like them don't you?"
"Well... yeah but...."
"Well then there you go.", Gerard smiled at him while he paid for the robes along with the stuffed toys Bandit wanted.
A slight blush crept to Frank's cheeks before he chuckled and said, "Well I guess this makes me your bitch for the day doesn't it?"
"OH yeah.", Gerard laughed.
They went out to ice cream after. Frank was elated, and Bandit nearly ran out of the car from excitement before Gerard got to even park the car. In truth, this is a typical family treat day that Gerard would take Lindsey and Bandit out for. Lindsey. No! He refused to think of her! Not now, anyway...
"Gerard, you coming?" Frank yelled.
Gerard realized he was still in his car, and had been sitting and staring in the driver's seat while Frank and Bandit were already waiting outside the Coldstone Creamery. Gerard mentally tried to slap himself out of it and he got out of the car and joined them.
While inside, Frank took a while deciding what he wanted. Gerard, Bandit, and... well... her always got the same flavors, so they were all ready when the server asked what they wanted.
"I'll have one scoop of the chocolate with strawberry toppings, in a cup. One scoop strawberry with sprinkles, also in a cup...."
"Mint wid chocolate!", a small voice piped up beside him. Gerard winced. Bandit was ordering for her mother. It's what she always got. Mint with chocolate chips. His mind began flooding with thoughts of her again. Suddenly, he felt a hand on his shoulder bring him back to reality. Frank.
"Um, two scoops of coffee in a cone yeah?", Frank asked the server.
Frank insisted on paying for the ice cream. They found a place to sit, and Frank frowned as he noticed Gerard had somewhat clammed up. He too remember Lindsey's favorite ice cream.
Frank sighed and spoke in a low voice, "Gerard, exactly how much have you told Bandit about this whole situation?"
"Well. She doesn't really remember anything from the incident. I just... I just told her Lindsey was going away on vacation for a little while.", Gerard shifted uncomfortably.
"I see.", was all Frank had to say. They sat in silence for a while, just eating their ice cream. Eventually Frank brought up the subject of ideas for the new album, and the mood picked up again. Gerard couldn't have been more relieved.
He was in a hospital room... Lindsey was in labor... she was pushing.... he was holding her hand tightly, cheering her on......the baby's head began crowning....it was coming out slowly....he was so excited....but it had no skin.....
"NO!", Gerard bolted up in his bed. He looked to his side, and Frank was beside him looking frightened.
"I heard you screaming." Frank began to explain, "I ---"
But before he could finish his sentence, Gerard collapsed into him and began sobbing hysterically. Frank sighed and wrapped his arms around him, rocking him back and forth slowly.
"Shh... it's okay, it's just a dream babe...", he whispered to him soothingly.
"I destroyed my family.... I ruined it....", Gerard sobbed helplessly.
"Shh, shh....You ruined nothing, Gerard. No one blames you.", Frank tried to reassure him.
Gerard continued to sob and Frank continued to hold him for a very long time. Frank felt terrible watching Gerard break down like this. Holding him in his arms and feeling him shaking and shuddering against him. Hearing his pained sobs and cries. It hadn't been this way since back when Gerard was doing drugs, back when he was depressed and suicidal. He was supposed to be happy now. He deserved to be happy. It wasn't fair.
Once Gerard had calmed down a little, Frank backed away a bit and asked if there was anything he could do.
"A cup of warm milk would be nice.", Gerard said in a meek voice and sniffed.
Frank almost smiled. Gerard really was such a child sometimes.
"Sure thing babe."
As Gerard watched Frank walk out of the room to fetch him his milk, he felt for the first time like things might turn out okay after all.
Next chapter: “But the past ain’t through with you.”