‘Thanks’ I smiled back. I didn’t know what to say nor do. I had been avoiding him and now I was face to face with him, in my bedroom. Oh the things I could do to him on this bed. I shock the taught out of my head. Ha who am I kidding. I’m a freak. That would never ever happen.
‘You’re welcome Frankie, why don’t you come down stairs, where just about to play some video games, I know you like them and your pretty good, better then me’ I could tell Ray had made him come up here, try get me down. It wont work.
‘No thank you, I’m fine where I am, Thanks for the pizza, you can go know.’ I know I was being harsh but I was now upset with Ray and having Gerard Sitting in front of me wasn’t helping the matter nor my mind. All I wanted to do was reach out and touch him, kiss him even, but he would freak if I did either. I’m a lost boy in a horrible world.
Gerard sighed and moved to sit beside me.
‘Frank, you can’t keep yourself locked up in here forever, it wont do you any good. You need air, fresh air, please come downstairs‘?’ His eyes were pleading, breaking my heart. I wanted to say know, tell him to get out and leave me alone, to never come back, but his face, his eyes.. I just couldn’t say know.
‘Ok’ I sighed, ready to kill myself for being so weak and giving in to him, when I knew going downstairs’ would not change a single thing. Not one thing about my shitty life would it change. He smiled and I got up off my bed and put Pansy on her stand. I felt something on my back.
‘No, bring her down with you.. Please?’ I sighed and picked her back up, I was to exhausted to question him. He picked up the pizza box and we left my bedroom and shut the door. We went down the stairs and into the living room. I glared at Ray and sat on the floor away from everyone. Gerard came and sat with me and I tensed.
‘Hey frank, how’s it going man’ Bob sounded way to upbeat for my liking, he was normally really quite, like you wouldn’t even know he was there. They’d been talking about me, I could tell. I felt really uneasy now. I mean what had they been talking about? How much of a freak I was? How I should just go top myself right now so Ray could have his home and life back? I agree with both of them.
‘fine.. You? I answered short. And looked down at pansy, she was my only hope of feeling normal. I loved pansy, more then anything. She’s the one person who hasn’t turned there back on me. Apart from Ray and my parents of course.
‘Good .. Good.’ he nodded his head and looked at Ray, Ray cleared his throat.
‘So Frank, the guys and I were talking, and well we were wondering if you would like to be apart of our band, we have a name and all, just need another guitar player, I know I’m amazing and all, but I can’t do it all on my own’ He made a stupid joke to hide how nervous he was. I looked up at him.
‘I’m sure you can find someone better then me, I’m the ‘band’ kind of guy..’
‘Awk Frank you are, we’ve heard you, your amazing, come on, please?’ Mikey was giving me the same pleading look Gerard had giving me upstairs, except it looks wrong on Mikey, probably because I’m not in love with him like I am with his brother.
‘Sorry Mikey, I’m just not up to it’
‘Come on Frank, please? We really need you in our band, it’s a perfect fit, your perfect for it, we want nobody else, but you, so please?’ once again his face, his eye.. I just could not say know.
‘Fine’ I sighed and the guys cheered.
Damn you Gerard Way and your gorgeous-ness. You shall be the death of me.
I know it's not long and i'm really sorry. I have just had no time lately. I'm not sleeping again, so this is really sort because i'm so tired and just can't think at the moment.
I promise i'll upload a better and longer chapter as soon as i can. promise promise promise.
So anyways let me know what you think. I'm off to try sleep and to give Jake a slap for snoring. so goodnight lovely's
- Cassie xx