Billy comes home from the hospital
4 weeks later
I got released from hospital today, the swelling around my spine went down and the doctor says i'll get full use of my legs back. My cuts and bruises are healing too which is good, not that I look much better without them, i'm ugly and worthless.
Joel picked me up from the hospital this afternoon on the condition that I get plenty of rest, We pull up outside the house, its a huge three story that looks over the ocean.
"you ok lil Billy?" Joel asks beside me.
He's been at the hospital every day staying with me most of the night's, sometimes the nurses would tell him to leave but he would usually just sneak back in and stay with me for a few more hours until I fell asleep. Paul and Chris came every day for a few hours but never really stayed that long, Benji never came back after the first day I was in the hospital, Joel told me he came back that night when I was asleep but I don't believe him. I'm suppose to be he's best friend and he won't even come and see me in hospital. I could of died and I doubt Benji would of cared.
I got my memory back of what happened about two weeks ago. I didn't talk to Joel for the whole day after I remembered. All I needed that day was a good razor and some time alone. it's not like anyone would miss me. I mean sure some fans might notice i'm gone but I doubt they would worry to much about it. The band would probably be better without me. I don't think Benji will want anything to do with me now. He hates me.
I look over at Joel in the drivers seat, he's wearing the same clothes he was wearing yesterday a white button up shirt with a black tie and black trousers. I doubt he got much sleep last night he didn't go home from the hospital till 2:00am when one of the nurses came in a kicked him out.
"yea.." I reply quietly looking out the window at our house.
He gets out of the car then runs around to help me out, I can use my legs but i'm still a bit shaky on them. He opens the car door and picks me up to carry me inside.
"Joel put me down, I can walk to the front door.."
He looks at me and gives me puppy dogg eyes "but I want to carry you" he says "and besides you can walk heaps when we get inside..."
"o.k" I say giving up, I can't argue with the puppy dogg eyes.
He smiles and carries me inside, there's a huge sign saying 'WELCOME HOME BILLY' and confetti everywhere, balloons saying 'GET WELL SOON'.
"welcome home Billy" Joel says closing the door behind us.
"SURPRISE" every one yells, running from the kitchen and jumping up out of there hiding places.
"wow, thanx guys....but do you really think I didn't know you'd throw me a party?" I ask us Joel put's me on the couch.
"well you could atleast act surprised lil Billy" Paul says sitting next to me and putting his arm around my shoulders.
"OH MY GOD...I TOTALLY DIDN'T EXPECT THIS" I say in fake surprise
"your just no fun" Chris says walking over to the couch.
"hey just cause your jealous doesn't mean you have to take it out on me....i'm the master....you can't scare me"
"you wish, we will scare you one day" Chris says
"yea right..i'm invincible..you can't do it"
Tony walks over and hugs me then sits on the other side of me "it's good to see ya Billy..sorry I didn't come visit ya in hospital it was hard enough getting today off"
"it's kool tony..I had plenty of visitors and Joel pretty much didn't leave my side so I wasn't bored at all"
"good to hear but I still would of liked to come see ya.. scared the livin shit out of me when Benji rang me and told me what happened"
"I didn't think Benji would care enough to even bother telling anyone"
I bet he was laughing thinking how great it is that I was in an accident, wishing I was dead so he wouldn't have to see me and think about how disgusting and fucked up I am. not that i'm alive at all. you can't live without a heart and Benji ripped that out of me and shattered it. Tore it into a thoasand tiny little pieces and stomped on it. I have nothing left to live for. if there hadn't been so many people with me and watching me these last few weeks I would of killed myself already.
"Billy, Benji was really devastated when he found out what happened, He was the first one to get to the hospital, your his best friend and nothin will change that" Joel says from behind the couch were he'd been standing
"Bullshit Joel if it didn't change anything than why didn't he come see me again in the hospital? why isn't he here now tellin me his happy to see me?...or happy that i'm alive? He hates me Joel and nothing is gunna change that. i'm sick and disgusting and he's never gunna talk to me again" I yell, tears were streaming down my face and all I wanted to do was hide.
No one but Joel and Benji knew about how I felt and now there all gunna want to know why he hates me. I would of ran out of the room but my stupid fucking legs won't work properly. How could he say Benji doesn't hate me? My love is never gunna be in a room alone with me again, never talk to me, never trust me. i've ruined everything.
"Billy...i'm sure whatever happened between you and Benji couldn't be that bad, He'll forgive you he always does he can't be angry at anyone for long you know that, He'll talk to you again trust me" Tony says hugging me
"..yea well maybe I won't forgive him....Benji will probably leave the band cause he won't wanna be near me, I should just die now and make everyone happy" I say completly honest, everything would be better if I was dead, Benji wouldn't have to worry anymore.
"where is Benji anyway?" I finally ask, I was still hoping he would show up even though I knew it was stupid, maybe he'll walk in the door any minute now. He didn't come see me in hospital and now he probably won't come near me at all.
"...well..we don't know, him and his girlfriend took off, Benji told us to tell you he hopes you get better soon, and he's sorry that he can't get home to see you" Joel blurts out.
"thanx Joel but you don't have to lie to me, I know Benji doesn't care, i've ruined everything that me and Benji had..or hoped of having....he hates me""
"thats not true Billy...he does care about you...b-but..he's just hurt"
"..why is Benji hurt?" I yell "i'm the one that got my heart broken - nearly died...was in hospital.and now i've lost one of my best friends..and Benji's been acting like the victim"
"maybe when he's in hospital with the risk of losing his legs no one will show up and see how he feels" Chris says quietly
"Chris..thats my twin and your best friend your talking about, and Billy you know Benji cares about you" Joel says
"what ever Joel I just wanna go to my room and lie down"
I try to stand up but I fall back down onto the floor before I can take a step. Paul and Chris pick me up and help me upstairs to my room.
"thanx guys" I say as they sit me down on the bed
"no problem lil Billy it's fine" Paul says
"no it's not" I say as I turn away from them and feel the tears welling to my eyes. it's not fair that they have to drop everything just to carry me around and help me. all I want is to go back to before when I had Benji and he didn't hate me and everything was perfect.
I walk in behind Paul and Chris, and see Billy sitting on the bed crying, I hate to see him cry. Stupid Benji he has no right to treat Billy this way. I walk over to him and sit next to him wrapping my arms around him. "what's wrong lil Billy"
"nothing Joel i'm fine" He says pulling away from me and lying down on the bed
"you need to rest Billy, if you need anything just call us ok?" chris says
"thanx Chris. But i'm really tired can you tell everyone thanx for coming and sorry i'm not much fun" Billy says in a tiny voice
"don't worry Billy i'm sure they won't hold it against you" I say trying to make him feel better.
"see ya Billy" Paul says and bends down to give him a hug.
we walk out of Billy's room and go down to the lounge room where all the guys from Mest, New found Glory and a few other local bands are all sitting around watching television or talking.
"how is he?" Tony asks
"he'll be alright Tony he's strong"
"so what the hell happened between Benji and Billy we never use to be able to seperate them
and now there not even talking" He says remembering the conversation they had when Billy said he hated him.
"it's a really long story Tony"
"we've got all day"
"then maybe you should ask Benji or Billy ...they'll tell you when there ready but its not really my place...sorry Tony"
"ok fine....i'll ring Benji tonight"
"wait you know where Benji is?" I say, Benji just took off and just left a stupid note saying;
sorry had to get away, tell the guys i'll see them in a few weeks
me and jesse have gone to a diffrent country
I push Tony up against the wall in the hall way before we walk out to the lounge room where everyone is. "where is he Tony?"
"uhh...would you believe me if I told you I didn't know?" Tony smiles and trys to look innocent, but it doesn't work. that look just proves his guilty
"tell me where he is Ton...he's my twin I have a right to know"
"ok ok .....he's stayin at my place for a few weeks..i've been ringing him everyday and tellin him how Billy is...he's really worried"
"yea well he should be, it's he's fault Billy was in hospital, the reason why he tried to kill himself"
"JOEL!!..that's not true and you know it, maybe if you didn't get him drunk and dare him to do it then it wouldn't of happened and everyone would be happy right now" Tony say pulling out of Joels grip and walking away into the lounge room.
Tony's right it is my fault, Billy trusted me and told me how he felt towards Benji and I completly fucked it up with telling Benji, i'm suprised Billy still talks to me at all.
There should be another chapter added after this one, i've already started writing it so don't worry there should be some Billy and Benji action soon ;) ...thats if you review of course..
Also check out my other story A Love Lost..i'm not sure its any good but if you could send me some feedback i will really appreciate it.