There was something about Gerard that I couldn’t ignore. So I did something I hadn’t done to anyone in a while; I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him.
Later after dinner, I noticed that Gerard still hadn’t come back. I’m not gonna lie, I was worried. I don’t know what it was about Gerard, but after I told him my story I seemed to feel like I had ‘connected’ to him in a way. Shit, that sounds stupid. I was sitting on the bed, with my back against the wall. I was about to get up and go look for him when I heard the familiar buzzing sound. It was after ‘curfew’. I couldn’t leave the room without a Supervisor, well… supervising me. For now, I’d just have to wait.
I was nodding off to sleep when I heard the doorknob rattle. I straightened up and was prepared to hop off the bed. It was probably Gerard, but I soon found out it wasn’t when the door swung open. Mike and another Supervisor slowly walked in carrying Gerard in between them.
“What the hell happened?!” I demanded, watching in horror as they moved to place him on the bed.
“You should be asleep.” The Supervisor muttered.
“Shut the fuck up!” I turned to Mike. “What happened?!”
“He had a panic attack.” Mike said simply and yet I heard a tinge of regret in his tone. “I had to sedate him.”
I didn’t say anything. I just watched as the Supervisor moved Gerard to the bed, carefully lying him down. I moved towards the side of the bed, and then stopped when the two of them stared at me suspiciously? What? I couldn’t be worried about my roommate?
The two of them headed to the door as I took a couple steps back towards my bed. Mike paused and turned to look at me again. Then he shook his head and walked away. I moved over to his bed, sat down and stared at him. Yeah, I know I’m a fucking creeper – but I couldn’t help it. He looked so peaceful.
His black hair fell around his face perfectly. And if you had looked at him without knowing a thing about him you would have just assumed he was your average guy. But of course; he wasn’t. There was a word that came to my head when I looked at him. But it wasn’t something I usually used to describe another guy.
Ah, shit. That’s sick. I sighed and threw a blanket over him, and then I moved to my bed. I closed my eyes tightly but sleep took forever to come.
I woke up with a headache. What had happened last night? Then I remembered. Ms. Hart. Mike. The needle. Ms. Hart lied. She said that here they wouldn’t do anything like the people at the Lennox House. Liar. Stupid me for believing.
I turned over onto my stomach then saw the sheets. They hadn’t been changed. The blood was everywhere. Where was Mikey’s blanket? Oh, God, the blood was everywhere. It was all over the sheet. The blanket. The pillow. Mikey’s blanket. I needed it. No. I needed to get rid of the sheet and blanket first. The blood was on my hands. I needed to get it off. I needed to get. It. Off.
I woke up to the sound of water running and panting. I sat up in my bed and turned to see Gerard, ripping off the sheet off his bed. He had a frantic look on his face and he was muttering something about blood. He stuffed the sheet, blanket and pillow into the trash bag – then ran to the bathroom to wash his hands again.
I got up and walked up behind him. He spun around and looked at me with a crazed expression on his face. Yeah, now I could see the ‘insane’ part of him. I took a step back. “You okay, Gerard?”
He stared back at me then thrust his hands forward, palms up, showing them to me. They were clean – still wet from the water.
“Yeah?” I didn’t see what the problem was.
“Blood.” He whispered his voice shaky. “It won’t come off.” He turned back to the sink and began washing his hands again, using the soap like a scrub brush and viciously rubbing it all over his hands. “Get. It. Off.” He muttered.
Blood? What the fuck was he talking about. “Gerard—“ I started but he let out a sob.
“It won’t come off, Frank!” He wailed, still running the steaming hot water over his hands – which were starting to turn red from the heat. I grabbed him by the wrists and turned him around, quickly shutting off the water in the process.
“No!” He struggled against me, but I managed to lead him to the bed.
“Gerard, there’s nothing there.” I said. He shook his head and tried to move his hands so I could look at them. “Gerard. Listen to me. There’s no blood. There’s nothing there.” He stared at me for a long period of time before breaking down into tears and sobs. Normally if someone started crying in front of me I would walk away. I wasn’t good at comforting. I was usually better at observing or ignoring the situation. But for some reason, there was something about Gerard that I couldn’t ignore. So I did something I hadn’t done to anyone in a while.
I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him.
And I liked it.