Sad Frerard oneshot. The world is a terrible place, but is it really cruel enough to refuse his dying wish?
Disclaimer: I don't own MCR. It causes me the most immense sorrow, as I'm sure it does you. This story is not true in any Way, shape, or form.
It's also very sad. And it has a moral.
Gerard looked up from the sheets he had been staring at to see Nurse Joy, his favorite nurse. "Mr. Way, you have a visitor," she said.
"Who is it?" Gerard asked, returning to his staring at the sheets. He didn't much like visitors. They were usually his stupid parents.
"A Frank Iero." She pronounced his last name wrong as Gerard's head snapped up. His heart sank.
If truth be told, Gerard had been dreading seeing Frank ever since they told him that his cancer was fatal. He only had around six months to live unless he had surgery. But the problem was, the only surgery for his type of tumor was a kind of surgery that no one had ever survived. Gerard had sort of tuned it out when they explained the finer details of it to him, because he didn't understand or care. He had agreed because he hated the idea of living with a limited time left. Of always having an hourglass ticking away your remaining seconds.
The reason Gerard had been dreading seeing Frank was that he couldn't bear to see Frank as though for a final time. Gerard knew he wouldn't be able to stand the sadness that would doubtlessly be in his boyfriend's hazel green eyes.
Gerard sighed, turning to look at his heart monitor to avoid Joy's eyes.
"Er...is this a bad time, Gerard?" she murmured. "Should I tell him to come back - ?"
"No," Gerard said, reaching a decision. If this was going to be his last time seeing Frank, he might as well do the thing properly. "Let him in."
She walked over to the door. When she opened it, the breathtaking, 5'1" man walked in, covered in tattoos and wearing exactly the expression Gerard had predicted.
"Gerard," he breathed, and ran toward him to sit on the edge of my hospital bed. Joy turned toward to do some doctor shit that Gerard couldn't see.
"Hey, Frankie," Gerard murmured, avoiding Frank's gaze.
"Gee, if anyone can survive this surgery, you can," Frank said firmly, squeezing Gerard's hand. Gerard waited for him to say something more comforting. "You are the fucking toughest person on the face of this earth. Remember those guys that beat us up?"
"And do you remember what you told them when they called you a fag?"
Gerard felt the corners of his mouth twitch. "'Your mom didn't think so last night."
"Exactly," he said, grinning. "And even though we were both out cold for several hours afterward, if you're tough enough to say that to five muscular football players, you can laugh in the face of stinkin' cancer. I mean, c'mon!"
Gerard smiled the first genuine smile his face had worn in days. Frank was trying to cheer him up, and the fact that he wasn't succeeding yet still trying caused him to succeed. Thinking about it made Gerard's head spin.
Eventually, the laughter died, replaced by a look of such intensity on Frank's face that Gerard almost recoiled. He grabbed Gerard's right hand with his right, so both his hands were in Frank's. Frank stared at Gerard, then inched forward, lips parted.
Gerard knew what was about to happen a second before it did: Frank moved up infinitesimally, inhaling sharply, before slamming his lips down on Gerard's with the force of a hammer. Gerard saw Joy's jaw drop in the fraction of a second before his eyes closed, and he was kissing him back with a ferocity that Gerard didn't think possible in his weakened state. He pushed his hands into Frank's hair, not even caring about the metal thing clamped around Gerard's index finger, as Frank's hands caressed his face.
It went on for what seemed like hours, yet not nearly enough time for Gerard, stopping abruptly when someone cleared their throat loudly from across the room. Frank's lips left Gerard's so suddenly he could have been electrocuted, and Gerard knew why: He too recognized that cough.
Frank jumped off of Gerard so that Gerard could see the furious faces of his parents. His mother was wearing a white blouse, a below knee-length flowery skirt, a bow in her ponytail, and an expression of deep disgust; his father, beige trousers, a white button-up shirt, a hideous tie, and an expression of hatred on his red, bearded face. Both of Gerard's parents deeply loathed and distrusted homosexuals.
"I'll just..." Frank muttered. "I'll just go..."
"Bye, Frank," Gerard murmured, though his face clearly said, Don't leave me with them!! Frank most certainly didn't want to leave him (he wanted to be by his side for all of eternity), but it wasn't like he had a choice, was it? Gerard's parents were eyeing him with the utmost revulsion, looked more than capable of murder, and clearly wanted him to get out.
Frank obviously couldn't so much as hug Gerard, so he squeezed Gerard's hand and winked.
Even standing outside the room, Frank could still hear Gerard and his parents having a blazing row. A hot surge of anger swooped through Frank's stomach: The guy was on his deathbed; couldn't they at least hold it in?
And as Frank thought this, a wave of misery swept through him, extinguishing the fury. This grief and despair had threatened to engulf him for at least a few weeks, and as Frank went to the bathroom to cry for a few hours, he knew that if (the words sounded alien even in his head) Gerard died, his life would never be the same. Frank himself had never been religious, yet he found himself praying to every god he could think of that by some miracle, Gerard would survive.
The next day was the surgery. Gerard couldn't eat for the whole day, and as he sat there, starving, he wondered why Frank hadn't been to visit him again. He needed Frank, needed to kiss him and him to say that everything would be okay, because Gerard wasn't sure himself.
As they put him on a stupid bed, hopelessness engulfed Gerard. He knew that the chances he would survive were almost less than zero. Frank hadn't seen him. His parents were livid - the fight was going to be the last thing he ever heard from them.
They wheeled him out into the hall, where one could see the waiting room. At once, Gerard understood why Frank hadn't been to see him.
Frank sat there, chewing his fingernails down to the nub. Gerard was too far away to be certain, but he was pretty sure that there were tears dripping down his cheeks. The reason Frank couldn't see Gerard was because he was sitting right across from Gerard's parents, both of whom were glaring at him like some sort of hawk.
Joy stopped pushing the bed and followed Gerard's eye. "Do you wanna say something to him?" she asked him kindly.
Of course Gerard wanted to. He wanted to more badly than anything he had ever wanted in his life. But doing so in front of his parents was about as safe as poking a sleeping dragon in the eye. This was probably the last time he was going to be able to tell Frank he loved him, and he couldn't. He couldn't muster up the courage that he once had to tell his love how he felt, and he wanted to so much. A tear dripped down Gerard's cheek as he murmured, "No, that's okay."
Gerard Way did not return.
No one had ever survived that surgery, and Gerard wasn't the first. The doctors told Frank,
"We did everything we could."
He died unable to tell the love of his life how much he cared. He died when his parents were unwilling to accept him for who he was.
He and Frank never stopped loving each other. "Till death do us part" had nothing on them.