"Frank, you have school to think about." Bett was complaining about me staying with Gerard.
"Bett, it's a Saturday. I'll do my homework when i get back tomorrow, i'll be home by dinner." I try to reason with her, she can be uncooperative at the best of times but i know she means well.
She sighs and thinks for a moment." Make it lunch and we have a deal." I give her a hug and she giggles. "I promise." I smile at her as she walks back into the garden.
"So, why are you so determind to stay with Gee? Oh, and while you answer that why have you been up there for hours with him alone?" Ray and Mikey begin quizzing me.
" We were just talking, lost track of time. I'm staying here tonight so we can research together for some homework i'm doing. He's really good at physics." I lie.
"Yeah....likely. This is the same kid who gets F's religiously for physics, right?" Mikey raised an eyebrow at me, my lies disintegrating. I knew i couldn't keep my little secret any longer.
Some kid called Bert then came running in. " Hey Guys!" He called and then seeing our serious expressions, he made a swift exit into the garden.
" Can i talk to you guys privately." I ask in the best hushed tone i could manage.
"Dude, you're telling us everything." Ray ordered leading me into the Ways sitting room. Ray makes himself at home all right. "Frank, what's going on?"
" You're both going to hate me." I say staring at my feet. "You'll never want to see me again."
" Shut the fuck up! As if i'd hate you, i'm your cousin so even if i did i'd have to put it aside. And you're great Frank, we've been best friends since birth and although you did cover yourself in art which made the family disappointed. Personally, i find that inspirational..... and pretty fucking rad too." Ray said crushing my bones in one of his famous bear hugs.
"Me neither Frank. I couldn't hate you. You're too fucking thoughtful." Mikey smiled simply.
"Well...Mikes, Ray....I..I think....maybe.....i..i..ammm....bi..s..sexual." I stutter, both of their faces turn into shocked expressions.
" You can't help that Frank. Just don't tell my parents yet. I'm here for you buddy." Ray broke the silence and hugged me again, he's such a good friend and as a cousin? More like the big brother i never had.
"Yeah, screw your religion for now. Just figure it out first." Mikey said hugging me too. I loved this kid! I loved his brother too.
" We love you dude!" Ray said all of us group hugging, finally i felt accepted.
"Is there anything else you need to tell us? You can tell us anything you know. We'll always be here for you, you're our little brother." Mikey cooed pinching my cheek with his finger and thumb.
The three of us laughed and then went back to how we were before our chat. " Tell Bert and the McCrackens i said hello" I say wanting to be polite but not wanting to keep Gee waiting any longer. They didn't need to know about Gee for now. Plus, there was nothing to tell. To my dismay.
I heard Frank returning from downstairs. He'd been gone about half an hour and in that time i'd done some bad things. I'd snorted a line and i'd drank a good few shots of vodka, i needed it though. It was an emergency.
"Hey Fwankie!" I staggered across the floor towards him, my words coming out in slurs. I'd retreated back to my room in order to grab what i called my best friends.
"Gerard, what the fuck have you done?!?" Frank looks scared of me. He reaches for my face and only then i realise that my nose is bleeding. My speech s getting worse now, my minds becoming foggy, my hearing is barely there. He leads me to the bed and makes me lie there. He looks around running a hand through his hair. His eyes widen as he spots my hiding place for stash. He runs towards it grabbing every last bottle, every last pack. I can hear him in the bathroom pouring it all down the sink and toilet, getting rid of every last speck. I just lie there, unable to move. I've lost Elena, my dignity and now i could lose Frankie too.
After what feels like an eternity, i hear Frankie come into the room. He's holding a plate of salad. God my head hurts now. "You passed out." He says sadly looking at me. "Your booze and drugs are all gone. I got rid of them all. Promise me you won't go back to that." He says and i can see how much i've hurt him, again already. I can't promise him, because i can't be sure that i won't go back. just stay there silently, trying to avoid looking at him hurt this way. "Talk to me." He says at last, sitting down beside me. "Tell me what it is. Tell me why. I'm begging you. We can fix this."
"Frankie, it's never going to change." I tell him. " My grandmother is dead. She taught me everything, she was the only one i always had no matter what. I had my parents but it's not the same. She was my best friend,my everything. And i'm gay, society frowns upon people like me, ugly disgusting fags." I spit the tears coming from nowhere, I honestly didn't think i could cry anymore.
" Gerard." Frank whispers softly. " You're amazing and beautiful and you can ask anyone in the world. Don't let Eliza and her bitch take that from you. Don't believe them. They're the disgusting ones. The people who don't accept you are the disgusting ones. With Your Grandma it's hard, i still feel that way about my Mom and i think about her every single day, but time is a great healer. Time does run out but by the time it's run out, we are mostly whole again." He says taking me in his arms. " I love you." He whispers into my ear. My heart begins to beat, finally it's beating for something worth more than my next fix.
More from these wonderful boys in the next chapter! Where a certain Mr Bryar and Miss Simmons come along for the party! :)