I'm just sitting on my bed reflecting on the past 24 hours. Content. Finally, i feel something for real. I feel comfortable and happy. I've spent the last hour with my best friends and on in particular has made me feel this way. My new boyfriend, Frankie. It's so strange calling him my boyfriend, but i really like the sound of it. My Boyfriend! Now we get to spend some time alone before he goes home with that precious little cousin of his. She's so cute. Then again she is related to the most beautiful person in the world.
" Hey" Frank walks in carrying two bottles of Dr Pepper.
" Hey Frankie." I smile not moving from the foot of my bed.
" Are you okay? I got you this to drink, thought you might be thirsty." Frank said smiling and joining me on the bed.
" Yeah,I'm great Frank. Just thinking. That's all." I say turning to face him.
" What are you thinking about?" He says taking a swig from his Dr Pepper.
" I.. erm... Frank, you've done a whole heap of stuff for me and you've saved me from myself lately.I want to make you happy, i really do. But i think this needs to stay secret for a while." I say nervous for his reaction.
" Gerard Arthur Way, what on earth?" He laughs playfully shoving my shoulder. " A secret? Really?"
" Yeah, i'm not ashamed or anything, i just really don't want you to have to give up everything for me. What if you were kicked out?" I whisper, horrified at the thought. He needs support and happiness, not discrimination and frowns.
Turning to me and lifting my chin with his index finger he said " I would take a bullet for you. And i don't care about what anybody says because after these past few weeks i am certain that for me, Its only you, and i only want to be with you if its only forever." He said making me smile and so we returned to our favourite past time of curling into each other and kissing softly.
We stand in the narrow hallway hand in hand. " Are you sure you want to do this?" He asks again, he's nervous and in complete honesty so am i.
" Gee, i promise, It will be fine, i definitely want to do this today. Are you okay with that?" I ask my nerves getting to me now as beads of sweat start to form above my lip.
" I'm not so sure." Gerard said shying away. " Maybe we should wait. We are forever Frankie, we have loads of time. Let's say one month anniversary. We can tell the world!" He smiles and alughs and god i love the way that looks and sounds.
It's easily one of the greatest things i've ever lived with, and i can't wait to hear it everyday for the rest of my life.
I'm sorry this is so bad! Im currently working on some ideas to try and make this more exciting! Lots of Love! xxxx