Gerard felt defeated, ruined and damned.
Gerard and Mikey drove to Ray's house using their dad's car. Mikey have been talking about Lindsey with Gerard, as if he's really interested about his big brother's love story.
"Will you please shut up?" Gerard said annoyed without looking at Mikey.
"You've never been into relationships before, right? This is your first time, it is Lindsey and it should be great as fuck." Mikey smirked.
Gerard didn't say anything as they arrived at Ray's house. From the front lawn, you would easily predict that there's a party going on.
"Wow. Too many people." Mikey said as he got out of the car. Gerard didn't get out when Mikey said those words.
"Let's go home. I don't feel like partying with this kind of party and shit."
"Gerard, you promised." Mikey opened the car door at Gerard's side and pulled him out.
Gerard gave in and got out.
They entered the house without knocking the door. As they expected, Ray is waiting for them.
"Finally! You two are here. What took you so long?" Ray asked as he gave Gerard and Mikey a friendly hug.
"Uhh... nothing. So where's Frank and Bob?" Gerard asked as he looked around at the living room.
"I think they're at the backyard."
Gerard left Mikey at the room as soon as Mikey found Alicia. He went out to the backyard and saw Jamia and Frank sitting at the bench. Gerard smirked and Frank saw it.
"Good luck dude!" Gerard shouted from a distance.
Frank just giggled and said, "Say thanks to Lindsey for me."
Gerard's smirk faded a little bit. He thought about Lindsey again. He asked himself if where she is right now. He went back to the house and found that everyone's dancing under those colorful lights and pop music. He's looking for Bob.
It seems that he's uncomfortable right now. He wanted to go home. He went upstairs and opened each room to find Bob. Unfortunately, he wasn't there. He might not be there at the party, he thought.
His phone rang and saw that Lindsey's name was registered at the phone call. He went to the bathroom to block out the noise. He slowly pushed the answer button and put the phone in his right ear.
"Gee, where are you?" Gerard can hear the noise and music in the background. She is in the party too.
"Uhh.. I'm here at the party, too."
"Where are you exactly?"
"At Ray's bathroom."
Gerard heard Lindsey's giggle and he quickly added, "I went in here so I can hear you clearly."
Lindsey stopped giggling and Gerard heard in the background that someone's talking to her.
"I'll be at Ray's mini library with someone."
"Be there if you want to know." and she hung up.
Gerard was curious if who's with her. He got out of the bathroom and it seems that no one noticed him. He went to the mini library and found out that Logan was sitting with a woman.
Logan looked up to him. "Oh, you must be Gerard." He smiled.
Gerard smiled back awkwardly and finally, the woman beside him caught his attention.
"Gee! Logan is the 'someone' that I told you." Lindsey smirked widely.
Gerard's heart dropped but neither of Logan nor Lindsey noticed the pain.
Gerard was trying to force himself to smile. He did what he wanted and said, "Oh, I must be disturbing you. I should go now."
Lindsey stopped him.
"Wait, you can stay here with us. We don't feel like dancing downstairs."
Gerard didn't to look directly at her eyes because his eyes were watery.
Instead, he didn't look back. "No, I'll be downstairs with others. I feel like I should drink some right now."
Lindsey noticed his voice cracked. "Gee, are you alright?"
Gerard gently walked out and sighed. "Yeah."
Lindsey was confused. She wanted to talk to her best friend but Logan is with her and she didn't want to leave.
Finally, Logan spoke. "So... what's your answer to me?"
Lindsey blushed a little bit and said, "Yes, Logan. Yes."
Gerard went downstairs choking back his tears. He saw Frank sitting at the backyard alone. He went near to him wiping his tears away.
"Where's Jamia?" he asked.
"She's with her friends inside." he smiled.
"So I guess you two are together now."
"Exactly dude! That was so intense." Frank smiled widely. That was the greatest night of his damn life, he thought.
"Frankie, let's grab some drinks."
Frank widened his eyes without Gerard noticing it.
"Seriously? I thought you don't like liquors?"
"I need them now." Gerard said without any feeling.
Frank was surprised a little bit and stood up.
"Be back later."
Gerard covered his face with his hands and tears fell down from his face. He felt like defeated. He felt like he is so stupid that he can't even tell his feelings towards his best friend. He is afraid he might just ruin everything.
Frank returned with a bucket of drinks. Gerard looked up when he felt Frank's presence.
"Here. Let's have some fun, dude." Frank said as he opened two bottles.
He gave the other bottle to Gerard and Frank heard him sniffed.
"Dude, you okay?"
Gerard didn't answer his question. Instead, he screamed "Congratulations Frankie fuckin' Iero for having Ms. Nestor." He raised up his glass and Frank just laughed.
"Dude, calm down." Frank said and took a swig from his drink.
"I'm just really happy for you." Gerard said, pretending he is happy to forget everything that night.
"Bro, let's go home." Mikey said grabbing the bottle from Gerard's hand.
"Leave me alone, Mikes. This is just my seventh bottle and I need more."
"What? Are you insane? C'mon, you should take a nap."
Frank was beside him, giggling a little bit.
"Frank, help me." Mikey said.
"Just leave him alone like what he said. We're still having fun." Frank replied and he accidentally spilled the drink on his pants.
Mikey sighed and went inside Ray's living room asking for a help from someone.
When he returned, Lindsey, Ray and Lou are with him.
What the actual fuck is going on in here?" Ray was surprised seeing few bottles in front of Gerard and Frank.
"Please help me dude. We should go home now." Mikey said, kinda worried. Ray helped frank while Lou and Mikey helped Gerard to get up.
Lindsey was staring at Gerard.
"Gee, are you okay?"
"Not this time." He slurred his words and unexpectedly vomited on the green grass.
Mikey was disgusted and looked away. Lindsey cleaned up Gerard's shirt and face by her hanky.
"Gee, let's go home, okay?" Gerard just nodded not knowing what to say. They headed towards the car. Frank and Lindsey is going home with the Way brothers.
Mikey took the driver's seat and Frank seated beside him. Lindsey and Gerard seated at the back seat.
Gerard seated few inches away from her, didn't want to get near to her. Gerard leaned at the car window and sniffed. Lindsey noticed it and seated near to him. She took Gerard's so he can lean at her shoulder.
Gerard stopped her and said, "No."
Lindsey sighed. "It's okay Gee. Cry on my shoulder."
Gerard can't control his tears anymore. He accepted Lindsey's offer and he sobbed quietly.
"You can tell me your problems anytime." Lindsey said as she patted Gerard's said softly.
"You wouldn't understand me."
Gerard cried as he wiped his uncontrollable tears.
"I am your best friend and I'll understand every single thing that you will say."
Gerard didn't say anything and Mikey whispered to himself, "Too much love do really kill you."