Kacy finds the courage to try to make a move on Brendon. How does he react?
Brendon laughed, "Relax. I have no intention of dropping you. I just didn't want to wake you up. You looked so peaceful." I felt myself moving with him as he walked to the front door of our apartment. He started fumbling with his keys but I grabbed them from him and leaned forward, opening the door.
He smiled, "Thank you."
"I didn't want you to drop me while you tried opening the door." I explained, paranoid at being dropped. "And since I'm now awake... You could always set me down." I added.
Brendon shook his head, "I'm taking you to the bed." He said, determined. He was so cute.
Soon enough he was gently placing me on our bed and I sighed in comfort at the feeling, "I love this bed." I told him as he gave me a funny look because of my bliss. It made me utterly happy just to be home.
"I'm glad." Brendon said, pulling his shirt off. I watched him, taking in the appearance of his chest. It was such an amazing sight to see.
"Are you still tired?" Brendon asked, not even noticing my complete attention being on his revealed chest.
"No, are you?" I asked, shaking my head as I finally tore my gaze from him.
"No but I was kind of hoping to lay in bed with you anyway." Brendon replied, smiling sheepishly.
"We don't have to be tired to be in bed." I stated, winking at him as I decided to try to make a move on him. We hadn't had sex yet and I didn't know if we had before but I felt the urge to be physically close with him in that way. "There are other things we could do." I replied, standing up.
"Like what?" Brendon asked, oblivious to what I was trying to say.
I stepped forward, placing my hands on his warm hard chest. It felt so good under my hands. My fingers lightly brushed over his nipples. "You're a creative guy, figure it out." I whispered, pressing my lips against his. He kissed back passionately, running his fingers through my hair. As I continued kissing him I started directing him towards the bed, stumbling slightly against his body.
Once we were closer I pushed him down on to the bed and straddled him. He was so perfect, so sweet, so gorgeous... I just wanted to make him happy. Realization dawned on Brendon's face but he didn't respond at first as I lightly kissed down his chest. It was the easiest thing to do and I had butterflies in my stomach as I nervously tried to think of what I was supposed to do.
I reached the end of his stomach and paused as I thought through my options. Slowly I started unbuttoning his jeans as I bit my lip, unable to look at Brendon's face.
Brendon lifted his hips so that I could pull his jeans down. Once they were down I stared at his boxers, lightly running my fingers over where his cock was. I could feel that it was hard and the idea of seeing it made me blush. How could I ever possibly be sexy for him if just touching his cock makes my face turn red?
I rested my fingers on the hem of his boxers as I attempted to pull together the courage to pull them off. Brendon's breathing played as background music to my thoughts and then he interrupted my peaceful nervous desire by speaking and crushing me completely, "I don't think we should do this." He whispered, lightly grabbing my hands as he sat up.
My mouth worked for a few minutes as I tried to say something to lessen the humiliation. "Oh?" Was all that managed to escape my lips. How else should I react? I had just been turned down. Brendon didn't say anything to help so I added, "I guess I'm just gonna go shower then." As I tried to get off of him. I struggled slightly and it only added to my humiliation when he placed his hands on my hips and helped me off the bed.
"Do you want me to make you something to eat?" Brendon asked, changing the subject.
I shook my head but didn't say anything as I quickly made my way to the bathroom. Once the door was closed and the lock turned I sank to the floor, holding my knees to my chest as I tried to fight off the urge to cry.
It took a few seconds before my emotions won and warm tears started pouring down my cheeks. My throat started burning as I held back my sobs. I didn't want Brendon to hear me. I didn't want to be any more humiliated.
I pushed myself off of the floor as the burn got unbearable. After I turned on the shower I let myself sob, trying not to be louder than the water was. Did Brendon not want me? Maybe I had been reading everything wrong. Maybe we weren't doing as well as I thought we were.
I was laying on the bed when Kacy came back in, wrapped in a towel. She immediately went to the closet, not looking at me. I could tell that she was upset. I really couldn't blame her either. Why did I have to turn her down? Stupid me. Now I had a painful erection to deal with as well. That wasn't new to me though. She constantly turned me on but I couldn't do anything aside from use my hand for relief.
Kacy grabbed some clothing and disappeared in to the bathroom once again, leaving me laying in bed wondering if she'd forgive me. She was already nervously shy, had I made that worse?
I just couldn't take her virginity knowing that I had tricked her in to dating me. We were starting to finally get somewhere right before she got hurt though. How was I supposed to just give that up with her?
She wasn't just some girl; she was my girl. I intended to treat her with the respect she deserved which meant not taking something so important until I was sure she was ready and I just didn't think she was ready for that step yet.
Kacy came out of the bathroom again. This time she was dressed in a black tank top and some cute spongebob shorts. She always looked so innocent and adorable. I kind of didn't regret lying to her because when we were together she made me extremely happy and I got the feeling that she was happy too.
"Hey, are you mad at me?" I asked, sitting up and staring at Kacy as she tried to avoid looking at me.
She shrugged, "No..." Liar. She was such a bad liar.
"Come here." I said, holding out my arms. She walked to the bed and came closer to me until I was able to pull her against me, hugging her. I gently stroked her hair, "You know I love you, right?" I asked.
After a small hesitation she nodded, "Yeah." She sounded so sad though.
"I didn't turn you down because I don't want to have sex with you. I want to have sex with you every second of every day that I'm with you." I admitted as she pulled away slightly and stared at me. It looked as if she was trying to assess whether or not I was being truthful. "I just want you to feel like you're ready for that and right now just isn't the right time."
Kacy seemed to believe whatever it was she saw in my eyes because she nodded and smiled, "You're right. Thank you for being so..." She struggled to find the words and found she couldn't so she settled for what sounded best, "you." She complimented me with that quite often and it always sounded so sweet. I loved the idea of her greatest compliment for me being the fact that I was me. It made me feel as if she truly wanted me. Could she actually be in love with me? I hoped it was how she actually felt and not what she thought she should feel towards me based on what I had told her about our 'previous' relationship that hadn't really even existed.
I nodded as I tried to brush my thoughts away, still amused with her compliment. "Anytime. Now get in bed. I wanna lie down with you." I said.
She didn't need to be told twice as she quickly got under the blankets and cuddled close to me. Moments like these were good enough to make me forget that I had ever lied.
(Kacy's POV again)
I was having a little trouble falling asleep with Brendon snoring in my ear so when I heard knocking at the door I was grateful to have a reason to get up.
I opened the front door finding myself faced with Ryan, Jon, and Spencer. Jon raised an eyebrow as he looked me up and down, "Nice spongebob shorts." He finally said, making me roll my eyes.
"Just come inside." I snapped. Why was I in a bad mood?
"Something wrong?" Spencer asked.
I sighed heavily and faced his friends. Did I really want to turn to them for advice? Ryan seemed to notice my internal struggle, "We won't judge." He said, in a kind tone.
Jon nodded in agreement, "Yeah, promise."
"I don't really want to talk about it here." I said, hoping they would just forget it completely since it wouldn't be convenient but no, they had to go and be good friends.
"Let's go get ice cream or something then." Jon suggested.
"Is this a with or without Brendon kind of thing?" Spencer asked.
"Without." I replied, feeling slightly confused. Even if we did go somewhere where I felt comfortable talking what would I say? I didn't know how to ask them for the advice I desperately needed.
Ryan nodded, "Alright, let's go get ice cream then. I'd put on pants though."
"I'll be right back." I said, going in to the bedroom to grab some pants. I just grabbed some off of the closet floor since I hadn't clean up in there yet. I switched my shorts for some light blue ripped jeans and quickly left the room, still able to hear Brendon snoring.
"Ready." I responded nervously as I popped out of the bedroom.
"Somehow I think the spongebob shorts worked better with your personality." Jon teased.
I faked a glare and started pushing them out the door before following them out. I could only hope I was making the right decision by going to them for advice. I had never been so serious with a guy before though. Was it normal to get turned down for sex? I didn't completely buy the whole 'you're not ready yet' thing.
Jon and I sat in the back of Spencer's car as he drove with Ryan in the passenger seat. "So seriously, where did you buy those shorts? I want a pair." Jon said.
"Walmart." I replied shortly as I tried to decide how to have the conversation I needed to have. They were Brendon's friends after all... Hopefully one of them would have the answer I needed to make myself feel better.
"Whats with the bad mood?" Jon asked.
"Shhh. Wait. I want to know too. We are almost there." Ryan said from up front.
"Will you guys promise not to tell Brendon? If you can't do that then I don't want to tell you. I just need advice." I said. I didn't want his friends to have to hide things from him but I figured it wasn't that big of a thing for them to just not tell that I had asked for advice.
"I won't tell." Spencer said first.
"Just advice?" Ryan asked skeptically but then he added, "I won't tell either though."
Jon nodded, "My lips are sealed unless Brendon bribes me with spongebob shorts."
I rolled my eyes and ignored Jon's spongebob obsession, "Thank you guys."
Spencer pulled in to the parking lot of Cold Stone and we all got out, walking in together quietly. Ryan nearly jumped for joy as he ordered his ice cream which was super chocolatey chocolate ice cream. Then Jon got some mint chocolate chip and Spencer got cotton candy. Then it was my turn, "I'm fine." I said, not feeling the need for any sugar. What if the reason Brendon turned down my advances was my weight? I didn't see anything on my body to be particularly touchy about but what if he saw problem areas that I didn't?
The way my confidence was falling really couldn't be mentally healthy. It wasn't all that high to start with either.
Jon rolled his eyes at me, Either order what you want or I'll choose." he said.
"Fine." I said, through gritted teeth. Why did he have to be so difficult? Strawberry cheesecake ice cream did sound good though...
It only took us a few minutes to get seated after getting our ice cream and paying. As soon as Ryan's butt hit his chair he asked, "So what's going on?"
(Hey guys! Thanks for everyone that's sticking with the story... So today I'm kind of bummed. My roommate moved out plus with the broken lap top it's getting hard to write/update/edit. I may have some grammar errors in this but I'll be reading through again later tonight. Any feedback is always appreciated!
I also just wanted to give you guys a link to my mibba page for this story. I don't have all of the chapters posted there but I do have a banner. If anyone has an account go check it out? My username is xhauntedxillusionsx
I think I'm going to be doing an alternate ending to this story on Mibba than the ending I'll be posting here. If you'd like to read both then give that one a shot! So far it's all the same and a few chapters behind but still feel free to check it out!)