Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance
Surrender To Nothing
1 reviewGerard is a loner; living in seclusion inside his own head. Frank is confident, outgoing and everything Gerard needs to pull himself out of his shell, but is everything as it seems?
0Unrated
Chapter One - I Can't Live With Dead Memories In My Heart.
“Gerard? For gods sake Gerard. Talk to me!”
Silence.
“GERARD!”
I glanced up from the black and white checkered floor and made eye contact with her for the first time this session. “I have to go.” I said merely. I grabbed my vampire-covered school bag and strolled out the door. What a bitch. I can’t wait ‘till the school term is over and I never have to see her dull face ever. Again.
You see, ever since my Grandma, Helena, died over 2 years ago, I’ve been seeing the school counselor. My mum was worried about me because I secluded myself from society and locked myself in my bedroom for weeks on end, without eating, or drinking anything. But I’m over that now. I’m fine. I’m always fine. “Oh, Gerard?” Dr. Jenson barked (literally) down the corridor, “If you refuse to cooperate, you will have to stay in therapy for an extra 3 months. That’s all.” She smirked, before disappearing into her office again. Bastard. It’s not ‘therapy’, it’s annoying-as-fuck-dull-boring-woman-questioning-innocent-Gerard.
I groaned as I walked into math, realizing how tragic my life really was. I’d had double psychics in the morning, stupid meeting with Satan DURING break (Terrible, isn’t it?), and now math? Are they trying to kill me? “Hello Gerard!” Ray, my “math buddy”, beamed at me, showing off his new green braces. “Oh, hey Ray.” I said, ramming past him and sitting in my graffiti covered seat. His overly-excited face dropped, and turned into a disappointed glare. “You don’t….Notice anything different about me?” He questioned.
“Hmm, is that a new haircut?” I grinned slyly. I know it’s awful, but I LOVE winding Ray up. It amuses me.
“No… Actually-“ I could barely hear what Ray was saying, as my thoughts were pre-occupied. Looking outside the window, at the dreary british weather, I noticed something very odd. A boy, a very small boy, most likely around my age was standing in the middle of the parking lot. He was wearing bright red skinny jeans and a MISFITS band tshirt. I couldn’t see his shoes properly, as he was standing in a pile of mud and leaves. But I have a feeling they were black doc martens with red laces. He was looking down at the ground, hands in his pockets. His messy black hair covered his face. “Who’s that?” I asked. Ray turned and also stared out the window,
“Who’s who?” He said, gazing intently into the parking lot.
“Oh, sorry Ray, I’m sure your story of how they got the colours of your braces mixed up is very interesting. Please. Do carry on.” I said, completely uninterested. I was still staring out the window at that peculiar boy. Something about him sent chills down my spine, and I found myself fascinated with him.
Ha, stupid, right?
----------
The night sky was a purpley colour tonight. The stars above shone like a thousand tiny torches. It was beautiful, really. I liked to draw my surroundings, and the sky was my favourite bit. I checked my phone, 23:48.
I best be getting back soon, I don’t want to be distressing my mother. Again.
I had just finished sketching the spiraling tree opposite me, when I heard a faint cry come from beside me. “Hello?” I asked, anxiously. Who would be in the middle of a forest at this time? Unless it was a murderer, rapist, lunatic or peadophile. I think I would prefer it to be a peadophile, as I am 16 years of age and it would be quite hard to perv on such a hideously abnormal teenage boy. I got no reply, so I tried again, “Is anybody there?” This time, I got a reply.
“It’s just me,” My younger brother, Mikey, approached me from the dark scatter of trees.
“Mikes, what an earth are you doing here? You nearly gave me a heart attack!” I gasp, picking up my things and staggered towards his frail body. He would never be able to protect himself if a murderer, rapist, lunatic or peadophile emerged from the trees. Good thing I’m here! “Sorry… You said you’d be back by 10, I didn’t want to get you into trouble so I came looking for you..” He replied.
“Wait, you mean mum isn’t home yet?” I wonder. Knowing her, she is most likely out on a date with that Ryan guy.
“She said she’d be home before 12, and it’s 23:53 and it takes approximately 15 minutes to walk home, 10 if we hurry. Even then, we won’t be home in time!” He snarled. “If I get into trouble one more time, she won’t let me go to that Metallica concert, and you know how much I want to go! God, Gerard, stop being so selfish!”
“I’m not selfish.” I stated.
“Yes you are, I had to drag my arse out here to look for you, in the middle of a forest, where there could be murderers, rapists, lunatics and peadophiles, just so you wouldn’t get grounded again.”
“I never asked you to come look for me!” I snapped.
“Whatever.” He growled.
We didn’t speak again the whole walk home. Even when I offered to make him a coffee when we got back, still, not a word. How rude.
When we got back, the house was silent. “something’s not right…” Mikey frowned, checking his watch. Big red letters flashed 12:13.
“Chill Mikes, it’s fine.” I rolled my eyes and walked up to bed. I set my bag down on the stained black carpet, before wondering over to my window. The sky was black now, with just slight hints of purple behind the thick grey clouds. I heard laughter coming from beneath me, looking down, I noticed that my mother had returned. She was cackling like a bloody witch, hand in hand with that Ryan dude. I didn’t mind Ryan, he had short-ish brown hair, that sometimes fluffed up in the wind. He also had big eyes, and a small frame. I suspected he was gay. I closed my curtains quickly, not wanting to experience the painful sight of my mother shoving her tongue down a poor, innocent, sober guys throat.
My room looked dreary and dull. There was no light, except from the faint, grey shadow from the moon, casting through my curtains. I sighed. I really need to re-decorate.
I quickly slipped off my t-shirt and skinny jeans, - which, by the way, are a pain to get off! – ‘till I was only in my dark blue boxers. I climbed into bed, slipping into unconsciousness.
----------
Something was wrong. The house was dark, very, very dark. There was an eerie feeling about it, a feeling that I knew only too well. I shuddered as I remembered the horrific accident that left my father a revolting disfigured corpse. “Hello?” I called. Nobody answered. I was alone. I walked up the creaky stairs, expecting to find my fathers rotting body, left lying helplessly around the house. But he was nowhere to be seen. I felt relieved about that, actually. I wasn’t too keen on finding his dead body any time soon.
“Gerard! Gerard!” I heard Mikey laugh, “This way, Gerard!”
“Mikey? Where are you? I’m over here!” I called, I felt reassured that Mikey was here. I didn’t like being alone.
“Hurry, Gerard! In here! They’ll never find us!” He chuckled, once again.
“Mikey?” I asked, nervously, “Who are we hiding from? Where are you?” I heard him giggle once more, before a terrifying scream echoed through the house. I knew that scream. I’d heard it before, two years ago. “Grandma?” I cried out, I need to find her, and Mikey too.
“Please, no!” I heard Mikey sniffle. I followed his voice, running frantically towards the crying 11 year old. “Mikey! Where are you!?” I screamed. I kept running for what seemed like forever, before finally reaching the weeping young boy. “Mikey, are you okay?” I asked, bending down and hugging him tight. He didn’t answer, in fact, he didn’t even acknowledge me at all. I heard another cry, from beside him… Turning round, I saw a small, puny, 14 year old boy, comforting his younger brother as they mourned the death of their beloved grandma. The boy was me.
----------
“Gerard? Are you okay?” Mikey frowned.
“What? Oh, um, yeah, sorry… I’m…Fine..” I frowned. He didn’t look convinced, but didn’t press the issue. “Well, get changed and come downstairs.”
“Mhm,” I replied sleepily. I felt sick, very sick. I managed to pry myself from the safety of my bed and drag myself down the stairs.
“Gerard!” Ryan beamed, gazing at me like I’d just told him he’d won the lottery or something.
“Hello, Ryan.” I smiled weakly.
“This is my sister, Sammy.” He grinned, gesturing towards a tall, skinny girl. She had very pale skin, with a few freckles on her face and arms. Her hair was brown, much like Ryans, and swept over to one side. Her eyes were a magnificent blue-green colour. I can honestly say, she’s one of the prettiest girls I have ever seen. And I’ve seen a lot of girls! “Hey! I’m Sam, nice to meet you Gerard” She grinned.
“Same to you,” I said, returning the grin
“Well, we better be getting off. Come on, Sammy.” Ryan smiled at me briefly, before heading towards the door.
“Yeah, I think I’m gonna head off as well.” I said, grabbing my jacket.
“Where? It’s Saturday…” Mikey wondered.
“Yeah, I know. I’m going to go into the forest.” I sighed. It seemed all I did these days was sit in the forest and draw. Hm.
“Again? Ah, come on Gee, why don’t you stay here with me? We can play video games?” Mikey grinned.
“Oh no you don’t. I have a terrible headache, I’m going to bed, and I do NOT want to be woken up.” Mum scowled. I shrugged and walked out.
A/N: I know not much happens in this chapter, but, i PROMISE it will get better and more exciting!:)
R&R!:D
“Gerard? For gods sake Gerard. Talk to me!”
Silence.
“GERARD!”
I glanced up from the black and white checkered floor and made eye contact with her for the first time this session. “I have to go.” I said merely. I grabbed my vampire-covered school bag and strolled out the door. What a bitch. I can’t wait ‘till the school term is over and I never have to see her dull face ever. Again.
You see, ever since my Grandma, Helena, died over 2 years ago, I’ve been seeing the school counselor. My mum was worried about me because I secluded myself from society and locked myself in my bedroom for weeks on end, without eating, or drinking anything. But I’m over that now. I’m fine. I’m always fine. “Oh, Gerard?” Dr. Jenson barked (literally) down the corridor, “If you refuse to cooperate, you will have to stay in therapy for an extra 3 months. That’s all.” She smirked, before disappearing into her office again. Bastard. It’s not ‘therapy’, it’s annoying-as-fuck-dull-boring-woman-questioning-innocent-Gerard.
I groaned as I walked into math, realizing how tragic my life really was. I’d had double psychics in the morning, stupid meeting with Satan DURING break (Terrible, isn’t it?), and now math? Are they trying to kill me? “Hello Gerard!” Ray, my “math buddy”, beamed at me, showing off his new green braces. “Oh, hey Ray.” I said, ramming past him and sitting in my graffiti covered seat. His overly-excited face dropped, and turned into a disappointed glare. “You don’t….Notice anything different about me?” He questioned.
“Hmm, is that a new haircut?” I grinned slyly. I know it’s awful, but I LOVE winding Ray up. It amuses me.
“No… Actually-“ I could barely hear what Ray was saying, as my thoughts were pre-occupied. Looking outside the window, at the dreary british weather, I noticed something very odd. A boy, a very small boy, most likely around my age was standing in the middle of the parking lot. He was wearing bright red skinny jeans and a MISFITS band tshirt. I couldn’t see his shoes properly, as he was standing in a pile of mud and leaves. But I have a feeling they were black doc martens with red laces. He was looking down at the ground, hands in his pockets. His messy black hair covered his face. “Who’s that?” I asked. Ray turned and also stared out the window,
“Who’s who?” He said, gazing intently into the parking lot.
“Oh, sorry Ray, I’m sure your story of how they got the colours of your braces mixed up is very interesting. Please. Do carry on.” I said, completely uninterested. I was still staring out the window at that peculiar boy. Something about him sent chills down my spine, and I found myself fascinated with him.
Ha, stupid, right?
----------
The night sky was a purpley colour tonight. The stars above shone like a thousand tiny torches. It was beautiful, really. I liked to draw my surroundings, and the sky was my favourite bit. I checked my phone, 23:48.
I best be getting back soon, I don’t want to be distressing my mother. Again.
I had just finished sketching the spiraling tree opposite me, when I heard a faint cry come from beside me. “Hello?” I asked, anxiously. Who would be in the middle of a forest at this time? Unless it was a murderer, rapist, lunatic or peadophile. I think I would prefer it to be a peadophile, as I am 16 years of age and it would be quite hard to perv on such a hideously abnormal teenage boy. I got no reply, so I tried again, “Is anybody there?” This time, I got a reply.
“It’s just me,” My younger brother, Mikey, approached me from the dark scatter of trees.
“Mikes, what an earth are you doing here? You nearly gave me a heart attack!” I gasp, picking up my things and staggered towards his frail body. He would never be able to protect himself if a murderer, rapist, lunatic or peadophile emerged from the trees. Good thing I’m here! “Sorry… You said you’d be back by 10, I didn’t want to get you into trouble so I came looking for you..” He replied.
“Wait, you mean mum isn’t home yet?” I wonder. Knowing her, she is most likely out on a date with that Ryan guy.
“She said she’d be home before 12, and it’s 23:53 and it takes approximately 15 minutes to walk home, 10 if we hurry. Even then, we won’t be home in time!” He snarled. “If I get into trouble one more time, she won’t let me go to that Metallica concert, and you know how much I want to go! God, Gerard, stop being so selfish!”
“I’m not selfish.” I stated.
“Yes you are, I had to drag my arse out here to look for you, in the middle of a forest, where there could be murderers, rapists, lunatics and peadophiles, just so you wouldn’t get grounded again.”
“I never asked you to come look for me!” I snapped.
“Whatever.” He growled.
We didn’t speak again the whole walk home. Even when I offered to make him a coffee when we got back, still, not a word. How rude.
When we got back, the house was silent. “something’s not right…” Mikey frowned, checking his watch. Big red letters flashed 12:13.
“Chill Mikes, it’s fine.” I rolled my eyes and walked up to bed. I set my bag down on the stained black carpet, before wondering over to my window. The sky was black now, with just slight hints of purple behind the thick grey clouds. I heard laughter coming from beneath me, looking down, I noticed that my mother had returned. She was cackling like a bloody witch, hand in hand with that Ryan dude. I didn’t mind Ryan, he had short-ish brown hair, that sometimes fluffed up in the wind. He also had big eyes, and a small frame. I suspected he was gay. I closed my curtains quickly, not wanting to experience the painful sight of my mother shoving her tongue down a poor, innocent, sober guys throat.
My room looked dreary and dull. There was no light, except from the faint, grey shadow from the moon, casting through my curtains. I sighed. I really need to re-decorate.
I quickly slipped off my t-shirt and skinny jeans, - which, by the way, are a pain to get off! – ‘till I was only in my dark blue boxers. I climbed into bed, slipping into unconsciousness.
----------
Something was wrong. The house was dark, very, very dark. There was an eerie feeling about it, a feeling that I knew only too well. I shuddered as I remembered the horrific accident that left my father a revolting disfigured corpse. “Hello?” I called. Nobody answered. I was alone. I walked up the creaky stairs, expecting to find my fathers rotting body, left lying helplessly around the house. But he was nowhere to be seen. I felt relieved about that, actually. I wasn’t too keen on finding his dead body any time soon.
“Gerard! Gerard!” I heard Mikey laugh, “This way, Gerard!”
“Mikey? Where are you? I’m over here!” I called, I felt reassured that Mikey was here. I didn’t like being alone.
“Hurry, Gerard! In here! They’ll never find us!” He chuckled, once again.
“Mikey?” I asked, nervously, “Who are we hiding from? Where are you?” I heard him giggle once more, before a terrifying scream echoed through the house. I knew that scream. I’d heard it before, two years ago. “Grandma?” I cried out, I need to find her, and Mikey too.
“Please, no!” I heard Mikey sniffle. I followed his voice, running frantically towards the crying 11 year old. “Mikey! Where are you!?” I screamed. I kept running for what seemed like forever, before finally reaching the weeping young boy. “Mikey, are you okay?” I asked, bending down and hugging him tight. He didn’t answer, in fact, he didn’t even acknowledge me at all. I heard another cry, from beside him… Turning round, I saw a small, puny, 14 year old boy, comforting his younger brother as they mourned the death of their beloved grandma. The boy was me.
----------
“Gerard? Are you okay?” Mikey frowned.
“What? Oh, um, yeah, sorry… I’m…Fine..” I frowned. He didn’t look convinced, but didn’t press the issue. “Well, get changed and come downstairs.”
“Mhm,” I replied sleepily. I felt sick, very sick. I managed to pry myself from the safety of my bed and drag myself down the stairs.
“Gerard!” Ryan beamed, gazing at me like I’d just told him he’d won the lottery or something.
“Hello, Ryan.” I smiled weakly.
“This is my sister, Sammy.” He grinned, gesturing towards a tall, skinny girl. She had very pale skin, with a few freckles on her face and arms. Her hair was brown, much like Ryans, and swept over to one side. Her eyes were a magnificent blue-green colour. I can honestly say, she’s one of the prettiest girls I have ever seen. And I’ve seen a lot of girls! “Hey! I’m Sam, nice to meet you Gerard” She grinned.
“Same to you,” I said, returning the grin
“Well, we better be getting off. Come on, Sammy.” Ryan smiled at me briefly, before heading towards the door.
“Yeah, I think I’m gonna head off as well.” I said, grabbing my jacket.
“Where? It’s Saturday…” Mikey wondered.
“Yeah, I know. I’m going to go into the forest.” I sighed. It seemed all I did these days was sit in the forest and draw. Hm.
“Again? Ah, come on Gee, why don’t you stay here with me? We can play video games?” Mikey grinned.
“Oh no you don’t. I have a terrible headache, I’m going to bed, and I do NOT want to be woken up.” Mum scowled. I shrugged and walked out.
A/N: I know not much happens in this chapter, but, i PROMISE it will get better and more exciting!:)
R&R!:D
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