Once Frank has come around i lift him gently from the tub. Horrified at the shade of crimson the water has turned as a result of Franks battered state. I try to look away and focus on fixing the broken form that is now before me. A man who lost his way, who i happened to stumble upon. I carry him through to the bedroom and set him on the side of the bed. Pulling out a pair of sweats and a hoody for him to borrow just for now. Sorry to be trouble Gerard I hear him say as i set the clothes next to him. Don't be silly, it's not a problem. Maybe you should get some sleep, i'll wake you up for dinner later on I say as i leave him to rest.
Downstairs, i decide to make a start on the housework considering Sophia has gone off to god knows where. I keep getting distracted though. What was that in the bathroom? Why did my heartbeat quicken when he touched my face? That wasn't meant to happen. It never happened with Sophia. Even the first time we kissed i didn't feel so good as i did just then. No, no i was happy with Sophia, we just bickered because we're such a close couple, that's all it could be. What i did know and was certain of was that i was going to take care of Frankie. I still wanted to know his story, of course i did. I wanted to be a friend to him. I wanted him to trust me.
Screw cleaning up, i can't focus. I call Sophia but get her answerphone. Well that's fucking brilliant. I mutter. I could make a start on dinner though. Considering there was going to be three of us tonight, plus i had no idea what i was going to make. I wanted to make something extra nice to apologise to Frankie, yet i knew Sophia wouldn't be best pleased with me treating him and not her. She believed she deserved all the surprises in this relationship. I never got spoilt for my birthday or anything, she always got a huge expensive present and the best day i could organise. She had been to Spas with her mother, been shopping in designer stores, even got a weekend away with friends in Las Vegas. But no, i never got so much as a cigarette for mine.
Hmmm. I seem to complain alot about her. Maybe i need to get out of this. Maybe it'll make me happier in the long run. Maybe i'm just better off alone. Would i be better off alone?
I wake up in a sea of soft white blankets on the comfiest bed i've ever slept in. I haven't slept that well in the last three years. The waking up still hurts like hell mind you. When i was with Luke i would wake up and instantly ache. There would be bruises all over me, crippling stomach pain from being repeatedly kicked in the ribs not to mention the way my head would pound. Right now, it was twice as bad as it had ever been.
My bruises had been added to today. More cuts littered my skin. More flaws, more scars, more damage adding to the trainwreck that is me. I couldn't really complain though. I had woken up warm, clean and in a place i knew someone cared. Speak of the devil.
Hey Gerard smiles at me brightly but there's pain in those green irises of his. He also looks flushed. Maybe he's sick. Maybe it's me. Hey Gerard I smile trying to sit up before groaning in pain. Like the hero he's been he runs straight over and eases me into a sitting position. How are you feeling? He says sitting down beside me, concerned yet still smiling somehow. I pause for a second. I'm okay. Can i talk to you about something? I ask reluctant for his answer. He looks surprised Of course. He smiles politely making my knees weaken.
Im a prostitute You were a prostitute. I had to get away from an ex boyfriend. He used to beat me up, rape me. He didn't let me eat. He didn't let me wash. Get me within a mile of that fucker and i'll smash his face in. I was waiting for someone to come and pick me up by the highway. I didn't know he was a pimp. I wish i could have found you, you wouldn't have had to go through that. I deserved it for being a faggot. My dad left me and Mom when he found out. You shouldn't feel like that, you can't help it and you're not a faggot. Well, actually i'm bi. See. Even if you were completely gay i wouldn't give a fuck. My Mom is still in Belleville. She's dying of Breast Cancer. We'll go and get her. She can stay here with you. I'm a vegetarian. Good job it's Cheese Pizza for dinner then. And that's me. You're fucking perfect.
I can't believe he's going through all this. I reach out and hug him as he cries hard into my shoulder. Shhh, you don't need to cry anymore. Especially not today, you've cried more than you deserve to. You shouldn't have to cry at all. I say as he tries but fails to compose himself. His entire body is shaking with sobs. Hey, come with me. I say pulling him up from the bed onto his feet. We can go and watch a movie downstairs. Your choice. I want to cheer him up. He lets go of me and i reel from the absence of his touch straight away. I feel my face drop slowly. Gerard He says looking me dead in the eye.
Yeah? I say, he's so cute when he's shy. He hides behind his fringe and the pink creeps across his pretty face.
Can we stay here first? I like it, it's so soft. He says biting his bottom lip nervously.
Before i can help myself i'm leaning forward without a single thought of anything else in the world and our lips gently connect. And i'm terrified. Terrified because it felt so right. Because i was starting to fall for him. And there was nothing i could do to stop myself. No safety net. All or nothing.
:) Thanks for reading! xx