It was much simpler and less painful to just live in the moment.
Party Poison`s pov
It was early morning; the sun had just risen, painting the sky a reddish pink colour. Everyone inside the run down building was awake though. Some, including Bee and Willow were sat on the make shift chairs, just barley swallowing down breakfast, a disgusted look on their faces. Jinx had just finished eating a few minutes ago; half of her food was splattered over the floor. She had grinned up at me before walking off to gather her few belongings. Most of the others were preparing for us to leave, excited chatter echoing off the paint and blood splattered walls, spare food and ray guns being passed around, goodbyes being shared.
It wasn`t a happy occasion today, the group that had been through so much together was splitting up, who knows how long for and if we would ever all be together again. However, we were all trying to ignore that sobering thought, pushing nit to the backs of our minds, embracing each other tight and gathering the last items we would need for our trip back to the old rundown diner.
Sat in the corner of the room, scribbling on her shoes in silver sharpie was Bullet. She had been there all morning, never once uttering a simple hello or goodbye. I was not the only one a little concerned about her, but it wasn`t as though she was ever the most vocal of all of us killjoys. Still it seemed that today she was even more reserved and distant than normal. The girl was hiding something, she wasn`t quite all right, I could tell. Most of us had gone through some shit in our lives, but I was certain that Bullet had truly suffered; I could see it in her eyes.
I hear footsteps behind me, and a familiar, less joyful, more tired voice than usual greets me.
“Kobra.” I turn to face my younger brother, a warm smile, the first genuine one of today forming on my face. It soon fades away however after seeing the look on his face.
Dark circles surrounded his tired eyes, his skin pale and hair all stood on end as though he had been repeatedly running his hands through it all night. Either that or he had been up all night tossing and turning.
He puts his right hand on my shoulder and guides me over to the exit; giving me no explanation other than he had to talk to me.
He takes a deep breath, as though trying to steady himself before speaking in a low, tired voice.
“I can`t go with you and the other back to the diner Bro.” he tells me, looking down at the ground shuffling his feet awkwardly.
“What do you mean you are not coming with us, Kobra?” I ask, too stunned and confused to say anything else. I stare at him with wide, surprised hazel green eyes, my mouth gaping open. He was absolutely serous, I knew he was. I could see it in his eyes, they were narrowed with determination.
“It`s Bullet, I told her and…and well I can`t leave her, not even if it is only for a short time. And-and I know she won`t want to come with us so…” he sighs. “I have to stay with her Poison.” He pauses, running a shaking hand through his dishevelled sandy hair. “I love her Poison, I really do. And-and she needs me here, I know it.”
I nod, placing a hand around his shoulders, pulling him in for an awkward one armed hug. “If you think it’s for the best, then you should stay here.” I didn’t want him to. I had always hated being apart from Mikey; I had always felt that it was my duty as a big brother to protect him. And now, in the current state of the world, I wasn`t sure how I could cope not being near him. But he wasn`t a kid and I had to trust that he knew what he was doing. I knew he loved Bullet, we all knew it, it was clearly displayed in his eyes and face whenever he talked to her or whenever her name was mentioned.
“Well if you change your mind we leave in half hour.”
“Will you come back, promise me you will.” Kobra asks, looking up at me, his current expression reminding me of the moment many years ago when I had left to go and study art. It had been the first time we had ever been apart from each other. It had also been one of the last.
“We will. I promise. We`ll just go and get some supplies and then we`ll all come back. promise.” It was a promise I was in no position to make. I had no clue if we would make it back alive from the dinner, it was quite a way away from here and even if we did get back there, we had no idea if it was under the control of BL/ind. And what if we were shot out in the zones? In this world it was not wise to make promises about life and death; they were so easily broken, by no choice of the persons of course. It was much simpler and less painful to just live in the moment. As bleak and often terrifying and sad as it was.
“I love you Gee. You`re the best brother ever, don`t you ever forget that." he pauses slightly" And…I`m sorry I`m staying, I…just can`t leave her. You’d understand if you had to leave Jinx.” I mentally flinch just the mere thought of being separated from the beautiful, amazingly kind killjoy I loved so much.
“I love you too Mikes. But your wrong.” He frowns. “I`m not the best brother, far from it. If there is such a thing it would have to be you.”