Gerard stood in the doorway and stared at me. I could feel his eyes taking in every part of me. I didn't care, because I was looking at him the same way.
I pulled my blanket up to my chin and stared up at the ceiling of my new apartment. I wasn't anywhere near unpacked. Everything was still in boxes and probably would be until the furniture arrived. I sighed. I was looking forward to sleeping in a bed. The floor was very uncomfortable.
My thoughts slowly drifted to Sam. He was probably looking down at me laughing. I had to hire a moving company instead of ask my friends for help. I shook my head, smiling. I was always stubborn like that. Besides, none of my friends had talked to me since Sam had died. They said I was depressing to be around.
I lifted up my hand and gazed at my wedding ring. I felt tears building in my eyes. I missed him so much. I took a deep breath and shook the thoughts out of my head. I needed to focus on happier things. I couldn't spend the rest of my life missing Sam. He told me to move on, and I said I would try.
I closed me eyes and almost instantly my head was filled with images of Gerard. His shaggy black hair and amazing hazel eyes. I almost couldn't believe my eyes when I first saw him. He was like nothing I had ever seen before. When he looked at me, I swore my heart would explode. I just hoped I managed to seem calm and normal while we were talking. I didn't want him to think I was a freak. I yawned, and thinking of Gerard, I fell asleep.
I was awoken by a knock at my door. I sat up slowly, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes. I had no idea what time it was, but I was sure it was early. I walked to the door, not bothering to change out of my pajamas. I was wearing a plain black t-shirt and blue drawstring pants. I opened the door and a person from the moving company was standing in the doorway. I shook my head, they couldn't wait until later to bring my furniture? I sighed, “I assume my furniture is here?”
He nodded, “Sure is. We are extremely sorry for the delay.” He paused, shaking his head. Behind him I saw Gerard's door open a crack and he stuck his head out. He looked like he had just been woken up. I tried not to laugh. “Do you want us to bring it up?”
I nodded, “Yeah.” No, I want it to sit outside all day, I thought. Seriously. What kind of question was that?
As the man turned to go back down the stairs I saw Gerard laugh as he came out of his apartment. He was wearing black drawstring pants and no shirt. I couldn't keep my eyes off his naked chest. I had to work hard to not reach out and touch him. “It's always nice to wake up at seven in the morning because your new neighbor's furniture is here.”
I shook my head, “I'm really sorry about them.”
He shrugged, “Don't worry about it. I needed to get up anyway.” He paused, “Maybe I'll help you unpack.”
Before I could say anything the people from the moving company were in the hallway with the first piece of my furniture; my couch. Gerard and I walked into my apartment and waited as the rest of my furniture was brought up. It didn't take long.
First we tackled the living room. We got all the big pieces of furniture set up and then I started to unpack all the boxes marked living room. When that room was finished, we headed to the kitchen. After the kitchen we did the bathroom, and last, but not least we did the bedroom.
I sat down on my bed, wiping sweat from my forehead. Gerard stood in the doorway and stared at me. I could feel his eyes taking in every part of me. I didn't care, because I was looking at him the same way. He still had no shirt on, and I could see the sweat glistening on his chest. Never in my life had I wanted to touch someone more. It took all I had to keep my hands at my sides.
After a few seconds he walked to the bed and sat down beside me. He nodded, “You've got a nice place here.”
I nodded, “I guess so.” I sighed, my thoughts drifting to Sam. This apartment would never feel right without him in it with me.
Gerard must have seen that I was upset, “What's wrong?”
I shook my head, “Nothing. Just thinking.”
“About what?” He asked. I could tell that he just wanted to know.
I decided to tell him. What's the worst that could happen? “Well, the reason I moved here is because my husband died three months ago. His organs started shutting down. I was just thinking that this place won't feel right without him with me.” I paused, putting my hands in my lap. “It'll just be lonely.”
I felt Gerard's hand rest on my shoulder. “Your husband was a lucky guy.” He smiled, “I'm really sorry about your loss.”
I nodded, “I just really miss him. It happened three months ago, but I still remember it perfectly.”
“My mom died when I was eighteen, and I still remember it like it happened yesterday.” he shook his head, “It was probably one of the most tragic days of my life, but somehow I managed to cope with it. I surrounded myself with great people and they helped me through it.”
I sighed, “It'll still be lonely, living here all by myself.”
“I'm right across the hall if you ever need anything.” He squeezed my shoulder, “Whatever the reason, I'll be there.”
I looked into his eyes and smiled. With him around I could almost forget about Sam. It was like Gerard and I were meant to be. I forced the thought out of my mind. I couldn't think like that. I barely knew him, he was just being nice. I nodded, “I'll definitely keep that in mind.”
He nodded and I watched as he stood up, “I should probably get going. Busy day ahead.” I watched as he walked out of my bedroom. I heard his footsteps in the hall and finally I heard him open and close the front door.