My personal collection of my favourite anon questions I have been asked.
Hello my lovelies.
So. Greetings from my apartment in Belfast. It is currently two forty seven a.m. (Greenwich Mean Time) and I am sitting with my boyfriend's cat, my boyfriend and our little home-cinema viewing system of The Godfather. I FUCKING ADORE THIS MOVIE, but Gearoid hates it because he thinks it's stereotypical and racist and all that jazz and basically he gets all PMS-y about it...
I'm brainstorming for the final chapters now, as our precious FOTG is drawing to a close ('oh no', I hear you gasp; yes, constant reader, all things must come to an end. Even gay Mafia fan fic) and this is a collection of my personal favourite questions I got asked over the course of this wonderful four months. Some are funny, some are serious, some are just fucking random as hell. I'm just doing this as a break from First of the Gang for a minute because oh sweet Jesus Frank being so sick and Gerard being his husband is so fucking sad and I was cryng a while ago and Gearoid was like Lorna are you crying at FOTG again and I was like YES ARE YOU EMOTIONALLY CHALLENGED MAN
Ugh, yeah. Just something weird to get to know your author better. See if I'm as fucked up as my writing is.
Oh yeah and my boyfriend's cat is called Dolores after the epic Cranberries lass how awesome is he and/or his music taste,
xoxo lorna (and Gearoid says hi but I told him you guys'd find it weird if the weird Scilian boy I'm using for my Mafia story said hi and now he's pouting at me)
The Best Ever Questions I Got Asked: January 2011-April 2011
1. What's your full name? You call yourself like eight different names.
Okay; not eight. About three.
Lauren was the first writing name I used, it's my middle name. It's because I fucking hate the name 'Lornaigh' with a fiery vengence because to me it sounds like a housewife or something. Now I just accept my name as it is. In case you're wondering, 'Lornaigh' is pronounced exactly like 'Lorna' just because I'm Northern Irish or whatever and my parents thought it would be so awesome to just add in a 'igh' after it. They never thought their daughter would aspire to be a fan fic author on an American site...*tortured artist's sigh*
2. Do you drink/smoke?
Well, depends on what time of year you ask me. I try to be SxE (Straight Edge) mosta the time, but unfortunately I have the worst sense of willpower ever. I smoke Cuban cigars cause they taste really fucking good and I drink sometimes, but not that much. It really fucking annoys me when that drinking stereotype befalls Irish people, you have no fucking clue. It's like saying all Americans are fat and all English people eat crumpets or something.
(Oooh, I love crumpets. But I'm technically British, so...)
3. Whens your birthday? What's your favourite type of cake?
April 14th, 1993, honey, making me about seventeen and eleven months. If you guys out there in FicWad land wanna make a cake for my b-day then please, go right ahead. Anything with a fuckloada chocolate and a fuckloada sugar is good for me.
4. Do you write other My Chem pairings apart from Frerard?
Um...not really. I mean, it's just my kink, yanno? I really like the idea of Frank Iero x Gerard Way. I presume you mean Frikey and Waycest, the two most common after our beloved Frerardness. I don't write Frikey because I personally cannot see Mikey and Frank together. I mean, call me retarded or whatever, but I just don't see it. Frank and Gerard, fuck yeah, I can imagine them like a motherfucking married couple. Just not Frikey. And Waycest? Well, I'm not one of those people who condemn it to Hell (I kinda think that's hypocritical; technically isn't all fan fiction sick and twisted or whatever? Eh anyway) I just don't write it either. I'd probably make it sucky. But it's better than Frikey in my opinion. Rob or Rikey or Frob or somethign, I dunno, I haven't read enough of em to make a definite statement. Basically, Frerard = pwnage.
5. Favourite authors on FicWad?
Death Cookie, Adnarim Smada, xx_eddi_xx, ChloesGreenDay, kill_the_mainstream, ilovefrankieieroxx, XxlovefrankieroxX, XFrankIeroismyheroX, fueledbyPanic...yep, they're all epicness. And, even better, they're all lovely lads, really nice. Check them out if you haven't already.
6. What's you favourite story of yours?
Probably First of the Gang. Yeah, First of the Gang. Full of Holes kinda sucked, looking back on it, and Holiday in Cambodia is a little short for my liking. Not generally short, but short for me, because I am the girl who wrote like a 90 chapter Mafia story. I just...I dunno. I'm very proud of FOTG for reasons I can't really explain and you guys probably don't care about. I like the Mafia anyway, and I like gory stories. As well as that, I hate like smutty Frerards where all of it is smut, yanno? Although Halloween by XxlovefrankieroxX does rock majorly. So I like FOTGTD. AND SWEET JESUS THE TWO OF THEM ARE SO FUCKING CUTE TOGETHER OIAWHE;FKTN
7. Are you in a band?
Yeah huh. It's name is the Synth Militia and we kinda suck but hey.
8. Are you abstinent?
(Can I just say how weird it was typing this because my boyfriend was RIGHT NEXT TO ME and I was like curse you anon for making this moment so awkward)
Well...kinda. I grew up in a Catholic family (even though I don't really BELIEVE in God...ugh yeah long story anyway) and when I was twelve I was made take the pledge of abstinence, signing this little form or whatever, sayinh I wouldn't have sex until after I'm married. It was kinda a bollocks though because when you're twelve you know fuck-all about sex and you're unlikely to have a boyfriend/girlfriend/sexual partner. I am kinda abstinent, but more out of my own choice than Jesus telling me to. (I don't really think he exists, so yeah...) I think you should have sex with someone you'd be prepared to marry. (FOTGTD quote; dear Lord I am sad) I think promesquity is disgusting and VERY unattractive in both genders.
9. Are you lesbian?
No...I have kissed girls as dares and shit, but I have only ever gone out (dated) two guys, including the one I'm with now. (He just glared at me; still odd for the Godfather thing) One was an utter cunt whom I think of as my version of James Romano (except he was not a gangster, was not English and his name is Eoghan) and now I'm with a lovely fella who I adore to pieces. Getting back to your question, my views on sexuality are pretty much what Gerard says in First of the Gang: you should fall in love with someone's mind instead of their genitals and all this yadda yadda yadda.
10. Are you a homophobe?
A. I write fucking gay fan fiction B. NO C. My best friend is a lesbian D. My OTHER best friend is gay E. Have you read my stories lately?!
11. North Ireland? Is that part of England? Is that where all the bombs are from?
It's Northern Ireland. It's part of the United Kingdom of Great Britain (England, Scotland, Wales, Isle of Man) and Northern Ireland, not England. And Northern Ireland has a history of bombing, yes, and we have troubles like everyone else. The IRA and the UVF fucked up everyone else's lives and they ARE NOT the governing body. Northern Ireland is my hometown and I fucking love it.
12. What height/weight are you?
5'3'' and three quarters and I think about 110 lbs or something
13. How often do you write a day?
I tend to write as often as I can, in school and at home. On a good day I might get about 6000-8000 words done, less if it's long hand (written out) because I write real fucking slow. On bad days, when I have no inspiration and shit, I might only get 2500 done.
14. Bands you hate?
blink 182, Avenged Sevenfold, Paramore, any type of screamy band that all you hear is 'FUUUUUUUUUUUUCK', shitty pop/boy bands, Kpop bands
15. Do you have schools in Ireland?
No we don't have any schools over here. I just got taught how to read and write from the local leprachaun that educates the village teenagers. Good man.
16. Do you have pizza in Ireland?
What's that? A shop or something?
17. What's your political status?
18. DO U LIKE WAFFLES????
YES I LIKE WAFFLES (you were quoting the waffle song, rite? But I actually do like waffles, so yeah)
19. Favourite album ever?
OK Computer by Radiohead, what else.
20. (I get this sometimes) You're my favourite author on FicWad!
OH MY SWEET MOTHER OF GOD THANK YOU SO MUCH YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH THIS MEANS TO ME TELL ME YOUR ADDRESS AND EVEN IF YOU LIVE IN LIKE FLORIDA OR SOMETHING I WILL COME TO YOUR HOUSE AND GET MARRIED I LOVE YOU SO MUCH ahem ahem I mean thanks man yeah coolio