*2012 REVISION* Chaos theory: a nargle flaps its wings in China, and Luna responds differently to Harry during their conversation before the leaving feast in OoTP. H/L/Hr.
(#) Hippothestrowl 2012-02-24 01:50:14 PMI've read up to and including Chapter 3 so far. This is nice reading. I didn't notice any techy errors like typos and stuff. It's comfortable and easy to read.
I wouldn't say characters are 100% spot-on throughout but they are just right in places.
It's a bit simplistic but I guess that's better than being obscure, eg, Luna hugs Harry. Harry hugs Luna. Hermione hugs Luna. How many hugs can we have in one paragraph. Try other phrases, embrace, held each other, held her close, put his arm around, etc. be more subtle, and you don't need to report every hug or it starts to get a bit scuse me while I vomit kind of thing.
Still, enjoying it and will continue another day.
Author's responseHi and thanks for reviewing.
I would recommend that you continue the story on fanfiction.net.
The story editor here is causing me no end of trouble trying to post my stories, and the 10+ minutes per chapter required is beyond a joke. Especially when the site then screws up the chapter numbering preventing the story from even linking the chapters properly.