I need to get updating more often like i used too >.<
Crying, my eyeliner running, my arms dangling, my eyes bloodshot, my mouth dry, my hands clenched into fists, my feet running not wanting to stop, i didn't know where they were taking me but i allowed them to take me whereever they wanted, i wanted out of here, My heart was aching but that didnt stop me, so much was going through my mind. So many questions that i never thought i would ask myself.
Why did i do that do Gerard?
Why did these feelings suddently come over me?
Was i feeling guilty?
But what would i be guilty over? Gerard cared and listened to me, its not that i dont love him i do, i have just treated him like a piece of fucking shit, i probably made him feel worthless and wanted, i was such a bitch, no im a confused, fucked up, fat, worthless bitch who obviously cares about noone but herself. If was clear, the messages were clear, the fog was slowly lifting, i was now realizing pieces of myself. I didn't want to rtush into a realtionship hat was the truth, but i didnt want to harm anyone, i didn't want my life to suddently come down. But due to the directions, decisions, paths i decide thats proving difficult for me. Then before i knew it i fell to the ground in tears, chocking on them, my body forcing them out as if they were a cancer or justin bieer invading my ears that listened to more realisitic music. I sat on my knees and brought my hands to my face just crying into them. I lookd up and the sun was shining, the sand was hot and burning my knees. I looked at my shadow and noticed something, it had all these different colours in it. I sniffed and stood up keeping my eyes plastered to the shadow, it was purple, green, pink, yellow and blue.
"What the fuck?" I said to myself. It was really strange. I took a step to the left and the colours went away. I stepped back to my original place and the colours flooded back into the shadow. I took another step to the left and it stayed colourful.
"Weird" I said. I knelt down and touched it and i could only touch the sand. I took a view at the surroundings, i had run furthur than i thought i had because i could no longer see the little hut or the van. I stood up and took out my phone and of course no reception. I looked over to the left and seen a small van. I scratched my arm and debated wheather or not to approach it.
"Bria is missing, Hozzie is down training, Gerard took the car and Jasmine ran away whats next?" I said sitting down on the chair.
"Eugh" Swan said.
"Come on lets go and find them" MC said.
"Yeah" Electrica said.
"Guys just leave them, they will come back" Mikey said.
"Mikeys right,t hey probably want to be left alone so just let them be" Ray said
"Okay" MC said sitting down again.
"Swan, your going to hav to design your killjoy outfit aswell" Unperfect Disguise smiled.
"What?" Swan said
"Your killjoy outfit to match your killjoy name!" MC smiled.
"Okay" Swan said
"Come on lets get started" Unperfect Disguise smiled and dragged her into the material room with MC close behind.
"Well at least we can let MC and Unperfect Disguise train Swan" Ray said
"Yeah and Dr. Death Defying is at the moment training Jenny" I smiled.
"Witht he help of SHow Pony" Mikey smiled
"Yeah" I smiled.
"She's going to be a good little killjoy" Ray said
"Yes, yes she will" I smiled. I was proud of Jenny.
"Has she decided on her killjoy name yet?" Mikey said taking a drink of water.
"Nope" I said.
"It will be fun to see what she comes up with" Mikey said.
"It will be" I agreed.
"Guys" Electrica said just going off her phone
"Yeah?" Ray said
"We have to go"
"Go where?" I said
"To BLI" Electrica said
"Why?" Mikey said
"Jasmine has been kidnapped" Electrica said.