“Yeah, I’m fine. Just unfairly tired,” I said and gave a huge yawn.
“Unfairly?” she asked confused.
“Yeah, I swear I slept forever but I’m still super tired. Actually it’s been like this for about a week…” I trailed off in thought. I heard her gasp slightly before she dashed over to put her hand on my head. It took me a second to realize that she was feeling for a fever.
“Are you sick? You don’t feel too warm but that doesn’t mean that something isn’t wrong,” she stumbled over her words in her mild panic.
“Calm down, geez. I’m just tired. Don’t go making claims of me being sick lightly, Hatori will freak out,” I said, pulling her hand gently from my head. I was touched that she was so concerned but she overreacts too much.
“Well maybe you should let him look at you if it’s been for so long…” she was obviously really worried.
“He already has ‘looked’ at me,” I said with a wink.
“Oh?” I couldn’t help but laugh a little. She was taking my words at face value but didn’t understand the wink. I thought about just leaving it but then I thought back to the conversation I had with Kyo a few nights ago. I decided to test the waters a little; maybe I could at least find out if he had brought it up to her.
“That was a sexual reference,” I stated bluntly and I watched in amusement as Tohru blushed fiercely and babble out a string of complete nonsense. As she tried to compose herself I wandered over to the fridge, my stomach protesting loudly at the lack of food.
“Do you want me to make you something?” she asked, finally regaining control of herself.
“No… there should be some leftovers I can just grab,” I said and threw open the door. I leaned down so I could see all of the shelves, sticking my head slightly inside. As soon as the smell of the food hit my nose an intense wave of nausea hit me. I slapped my hand over my mouth and ran out into the hall, crashing into someone. I realized it was Hatori as his concerned voice mixed in with Tohru’s. I paid neither of them any mind as I hurtled down the hall and into the bathroom. I barely made it to the toilet before I was violently sick.
I felt someone gather my hair and hold it back, but I was far too busy wondering how I could have been so hungry with this much in my stomach. Let alone how I could go from being starving to hurling in less than thirty seconds. As soon as I finished I stayed in my shaky squatting position for a few seconds while I desperately tried to catch my breath. I shoved myself up and over so I could sit on the edge of the bathtub and let my head fall into my hands.
“Inora, here,” Hatori’s voice was tight with concern as he took one of my hands and put something cold in it. I looked from the glass of water in my hand to my husband’s face with a weak smile. I knew he would act like this but I still loved it.
“Something must have gone bad in the fridge… I don’t know why else that would have happened,” I said.
“But you’ve also been tired all week right?” I looked up to see that Tohru had also followed me down the hall.
“I had seen that, but I just figured it was because you’re not sleeping well…” Hatori said, his voice heavy with guilt.
“Not sleeping well? It seems to me like I’ve been sleeping for way longer than usual,” I said and sipped at the water. I seem to be ok now…
“You’ve been sleepwalking. I will wake up to find you out in the hall… one time you tried to… ‘rescue’ me from the bed… which you seemed to believe was on fire,” he said slowly. He knew I didn’t like to talk about my nightmares.
“When was that? And why didn’t you tell me? I had no idea…” I knew I talked in my sleep sometimes, and I would thrash if it was about the accident… but I had never gone as far as bodily moving someone.
“Two nights ago, and I guess I just didn’t want to remind you of your dreams…” he explained, his voice and eyes still laden with guilt.
“It’s not your fault. Hmm… two nights ago, Oh yeah, I remember. It was…” I trailed off and looked at Tohru. I had almost forgotten she was there.
“I’ll go check for anything that’s gone bad,” she said brightly, seeming to pick up that this was personal. She left with Hatori’s and my muttered thanks to check and, knowing her, obsessively clean the fridge.
“I had the dream again but different,” I started quietly. “The car crashed and caught fire, just like always, but then it changed. Usually I just lay there and watch the car burn and… hear my parents scream, but this time I was able to get up. I ran back to the car to help but all I found was you there, so I tried to pull you out,” my voice was shaking, little more than a whisper most of the time. He wordlessly pulled me against him and rubbed his hand soothingly up and down my back. I looked up in time to see Kyo in the doorway; he gave me a rare soft smile when he caught my eye. Despite what he says he loves seeing Hatori and me like this.
“Was that you making that noise a while ago? I thought a whale had beached itself in the bathtub or somethin’,” Kyo said, his smile turning into more of a smirk.
“Oh, shut up. It was not that bad,” I said with a laugh. “Actually I feel just fine now. I don’t know what that was.” I went over to the sink and brushed my teeth with Hatori hovering nearby. I could tell from the look on his face that he was trying to figure out what could be wrong with me. After I was finished I set down the toothbrush with a sigh, I was about to tell him to stop worrying but I was interrupted by my stomach snarling.
“You’re hungry?” he asked confused.
“Yeah. I was already hungry before… I wonder if Tohru found anything,” I wondered. I made a beeline for the kitchen with Hatori following until there was a loud, demanding knock on the door. I heard him sigh, from the knock we could tell that it was either Shigure or Ayame, and he went to answer the door instead. I went through the kitchen door to find Tohru on her knees in front of the fridge scrubbing with all her might. All of its contents were placed neatly on the counter next to it.
“Tohru, you didn’t have to go through so much trouble,” I said with a sigh.
“Oh it’s no trouble at all. I went through all the food and couldn’t find anything wrong so I decided to just wash it out,” she said and beamed at me.
“Do you want any help?” I knew she wouldn’t but I still felt the need to ask.
“Oh no, I’m fine,” she said cheerfully. I nodded and went to wash my hands before making myself something to eat. The scent of soap wafted up to my nose and I froze. It smelled the same but different. Some insane part of me wanted to lick it right off my hands.
“Smell this,” I said abruptly and shoved my soapy hands under her nose.
“It smells like soap…” she was so confused.
“Well yeah but… man, I must be hungry if I want to start eating soap,” I said with a laugh and rinsed off my hands with a nagging regret in the back on my mind.
“You’re craving… soap?” she asked hesitantly.
“I guess so. Weird huh?”
“You’re tired all the time, threw up without being sick, your sleepwalking every night and now… you want to eat soap,” she explained slowly.
“Wow. Weird week for me I guess,” I laughed.
“Inora?” she asked, her face breaking into a beam.
“Yeah?” Why is she suddenly so happy?
“Are you… pregnant?” she clasped her hands in front of her chest and looked like she was going to start bouncing. I stared at her. There is no way in hell I’m pregnant. Right? I don’t know how long I stood there frozen looking at her, but she eventually stopped beaming in favor of a more concerned look. She reached out slowly to touch my shoulder. With an effort I shook myself out of the shock and hurried out of the kitchen again. I heard voices in the living room and I burst in looking around wildly. Both Shigure and Ayame had shown up and Hatori was sitting with them. I rushed right over to him, grabbed his arm, and started pulling him out of the chair.
“Inora wha-” he started but I franticly cut him off.
“We need to go to the store. Now!” I almost screamed in my panic. He didn’t ask again, and we were out of the door within a minute.
I hurried down the aisles with Hatori right behind me. We had spent the whole car ride in silence though I could tell he was dying to ask me what was wrong. When I came to an abrupt halt and turned to look at the shelf I heard him gasp slightly. A second later his hand slid into mine and we just stood there staring down all of the pregnancy tests.
“Are you sure?” he asked finally.
“Well no. That’s why we’re here,” I winced at my condescending tone. “Sorry. I guess I’m just a little nervous.”
“I understand,” he said gently. He let go of my hand in favor of wrapping it around my shoulders and I felt him gently kiss my hair.
“Ok ‘doctor’ which one should we get?” I asked, looking back at the vast amounts of tests. He was silent for a moment then his hand shot out and grabbed a box. We walked back down the aisle with his arm still around me and started back home. I wondered vaguely if I could put off the test but… Hatori had other plans.
As soon as we were in the door he began guiding me to the bathroom, and away from everyone’s questions. From what I could make out of all the questions being thrown at me Tohru must have told them why I was acting so weird. Everyone followed me down the hall, I was about to snap if they didn’t give me space soon. I was insanely overwhelmed. As soon as I reached the bathroom I rounded on everyone.
“All of you get lost. I’m serious. I need some space and if I don’t get it I’m gonna start throwing punches,” I gave them a warning glare before slamming the door in everyone’s face. I let out a nervous chuckle as I looked at the box in my hand, then a real one as I remembered that even Kyo was standing on the other side of the door. It was nice that they all cared but is a little privacy too much to ask? Whatever, nothing I say will make any of them leave that spot.
I never realized before now how awkward taking these tests were. Once I finished I set it on the counter and backed away as if it were a bomb. I tried to ignore the voices on the other side of the door as I counted in my head. After the time was up I waited a while longer just in case, but I had to look eventually. My knees were shaking hard as I took the two steps to the counter; I took a deep breath and looked down at the little stick. It was positive.
How did this happen? I’m on the pill and I never forget to take it for this very reason. How do I tell Hatori? Will he be happy or will he be just as unprepared as I am? I’m only 21, is it selfish of me to want to live a little before having a kid? I just need to calm down. Pills aren’t 100 percent effective, and this is happening regardless of my age and whether or not I want it. As for Hatori… the only way to know is to suck it up and tell him. In the back of my mind I knew I was pregnant as soon as Tohru mentioned it, and I have a feeling Hatori knew as soon as he saw the tests.
I grabbed the test, part of me wanting to crush it in my hand, and made my way slowly to the door. I heard everyone still on the other side; I didn’t want to deal with them yet. I threw open the door, grabbed Hatori’s arm and pulled him roughly inside before slamming it again. With a shaky hand I gave him the test. I watched his face closely as he took it and stared at it for what seemed like forever. Suddenly his face broke into a huge grin and he threw his arms around me. He actually picked me up and spun me around once before setting me back down.
“We’re going to have a baby,” he sounded close to tears and I heard him laugh. His real laugh. I hid my face in his chest. He was so happy, I didn’t want to ruin this moment for him. I’m not ready for this. I’m too young. How can anyone honestly trust me with raising an innocent, helpless baby? Hatori threw open the door and joyfully told everyone the news. There was an eruption of ‘congratulations’ and suddenly I was being passed around for hugs. They must have taken the look on my face for shock or something. I finally stumbled over to Kyo and he gave me a warm hug. When he let me go I slowly looked up into his face and saw his smile vanish.
“Hey, are you ok?” he asked softly, concern etched into his face.
“No,” I choked out before running out of the house.