Not a story, I'm sorry. But, but, but, I had to tell someone! I'm not expecting you to care, but I'm the happiest I've been in three years of depression, anorexia, and self mutilation!
Okay, so I have a severely bad case of depression.
Whopping dee doo. That doesn't make me particularly special, it's just a fact of my life. I cut myself for two years, forced myself to throw up, denied myself food, etc, etc.
Why? Because I was as gay as a unicorn fried in motherfucking rainbows.
Correction, I AM as gay as a unicorn fried in motherfucking rainbows. :D
Anyway, I had this friend. And by friend, I of course mean girl who I have had a crush on for QUITE a long while. xD She doesn't know that she is the reason I've stopped cutting, forcing myself to throw up, and denying food.
We played little ditties for each other on her guitar (because we both play), we cuddled, we held hands while moshing at a concert, we got into a cat-pun-war, we joked, we laughed, danced, laughed, cried... As a matter a fact, we still do all of that.
She was there for me when I came out as being a fag, and I was there for her when she lost her virginity (to someone else), and I watched her favorite show with her (Buffy), and ate blue cake with her to cheer her up when he broke her heart, and came out as bi all in the same day.
Then one day. I was talking to her (as we always do), and she confessed how nervous she was. When I asked why, she said it was because she wanted to ask someone out.
I could FEEL my heart plummet, lower than it has really, EVER fell. I asked who, and she said it was a girl named Linnea.
So I of course said that she should try asking her out. After class, she asked if I would be HER Linnea. I said yes, so long as she would be MY Madison. then we held hands.
She kissed my scars, and said I was a beautiful human being, who didn't deserve that.
It was a full week befor we kissed. And it just so happened, that it was last night. :3
We were cuddling, watching Elvira Lady of Darkness, and she was sleeping over. When it came time to go to sleep... I tucked her in, and kissed her cheek. later, she had to get up. When she came back in, intucked her in, and kissed her forehead. Then she pulled me in, and kissed me.
Ohmigod. I'm such a fucking girlie girl but when it comes to Madison I DINT GIVE A SHIT. I may wear leather, and eyeliner, and have green hair, and hardly ever smile, and be a sarcastic bitch, but I think I'm in love with her.
I think this is love.
I love her.