Oh My God. I cannot believe they just said that to us. I like Mikey alot! But he is in a really bad state at the moment and I can't be confusing things anymore than things already are. He is going through such a horrible tragedy caused by the people who should love him the most. But they just decide to move away from them without a reason. No reason is good enough to just move away from him. He is so fragile, so introverted and just so damn shy. Painfully shy. He is afraid to talk half the time in fear I'd laugh. But I couldn't. I wouldn't have the guts to break the delicate shell of an amazing guy. That's what he is a shell of himself. That's what his parents and his classmates reduced him to. Gerard is the only one keeping him from fading away completely. He may be a mere shadow of himself but Gerard has had it hard enough aswell. To bring up his brother. To live with the false guilt of thinking he has let Mikey down. To get to the point where he can't even live with his parents.
"Mikey. You know you should be really proud of yourself. I mean I don't know exactly what has happened but any kid that cries himself to sleep each night and suffers the beatings from his own parents and is still alive deserves everything they want."
He looks down in shyness and true modesty. He really doesn't see it. He has been told too many times before that he is the pathetic loser is thinks himself to be. I need to show it to him.
"I don't deserve anything Frank. Really I don't."
"Oh Mikes. If you could just see how amazing you are to me and In sure Gerard thinks the same. You need to believe me."
"But Frank, how am I supposed to believe you when even my mother told me to rot in Hell once. When I have been told to fuck off a million times. How do you think I can trust someone when everyone else besides Gerard has hated me. I just can't."
There are tears dripping from his eyes and he hides his face in his arms as we sit outside on the wall about to leave school.
"I know it's hard for you to trust after what has happened but I really love you"
He goes quiet and so I decide to stand up and drop the conversation. He gets up aswell and we head to my house slowly. When I arrive I find the house empty. We go into my room and relax on my bed. I lie back and stretch while just sits lightly on the bed fearful to disrupt anything.
"Mikes you can relax you know"
He returns a small smile and sits back more.
"Hey. Do you want something to eat? You must be starving since you didn't eat in school" I want him to eat something. He is paper thin and too light. He must go days without eating. It's worrying.
"No thanks. I'm fine." He shakes his head Unfortunatley.
"Even some crisps? Please Mikey. Your skinny body so cold and you could really do with something to eat.Please?"
He gives in easily and takes a bag of crisps and we sit back to watch a film. A horror of course! Ending up in him flinching everytime someone is slashed with a knife. Nice choice Frank. Way to bring back memories! I look at him with his head buried in his knees. He is so distant from people. I pull him in startling him a bit. He still hasn't touched his crisps and it is seriously worrying. I need to know.
" Mikey are you... by any chance... anorexic? I won't judge you if you are. I just need to know" He looks up wide eyed and replies a little too fast for my liking.
"No! I-I mean I'm not." He looks at me with pleading eyes to forget it but how can I forget about something like that. He is unhealthily thin.
"It's just I never see you eat and you're the most skinniest guy. I can see you rib cage perfectly." ,I continued.
He mumbled something incoherent
"What is it, mikes?" I asked.
"I-I... I just n-never feel like eating. I get hungry but I always feel sick after so I j-just don't eat". I need to fix this kid. Gerard must be finding it so difficult aswell. Trying to make the money to pay for shelter and to look after Mikey. But I can help now. help both of them. I want to. I want to save the Way brothers!
"do you think they will ever come back Frank?" he asks so desperately. Wanting a truthful answer. He is just so heart broken and still in shock from it all.
"Honestly, I want to say yes. That they will miss you too much but I really don't know. I think if they don't comeback they aren't even worth the thoughts." I wish I could do something more for him but I can't save him from the leaving of his parents. All I can do is comfort him. I hope it will be enough!
I guess this chapter is about Franks concern and love for Mikey so I hope that comes through. I really hope you liked it. I'm not sure what it's like really
P.S. I saw The Hunger Games in the cinema today and it was just soooo good. I would certainly recommend it if you like this kind of genre!