I felt so sick. I didnt vomit but I felt like I was. If I didnt sleep at Franks last night it wouldn't have happened. I should have stayed with my brother. We would have both been safe. Safe from the accident and safe from my nightmares he can easily snap me out of. I couldn't talk. When I answered my phone at Franks I felt my heart stop and all the blood in my body froze. I couldn't believe it. What if he had died? Just because I Slept at Franks. Because I didn't have the common sense to text him in the morning. I let him down.
I was walking back from the bathroom in the corridor and as I was coming up to Gerard's room I heard them talking.
"-he woke up after a nightmare. I don't know what it was but it took him a while to relax. He started freaking out. Does he usually get nightmares?" Frank said urgently. Why are they talking about me? Gerard's the one hurt.
"Yeah. I have talked to him about them but he just says he's fine or something. I don't know what they are about either." Gerard replies. Why should they care what happens in my dreams? I was just about to step in when Frank added "We should also help him with his anorexia." Shit! Gerard doesn't know I have this problem. Gerard's gonna be worrying over me now and making sure I eat. Why'd you have to say that Frank? No. It's not Franks fault. He just wanted to help. Not get me in trouble. It's my fault for being the stupid bastard and not eating. There is a tense silence which I then take my chance to enter.
When I walk in Gerard's face is showing complete shock staring at the ground. He then sees me and plasters his face with a small smile. Frank turns around and looks a bit guilty but also offers a smile. I take my seat again not making any eye contact.
"Gerard was just saying how he is feeling better already!" Frank chimes in, in a cheery voice.
Gerard agrees. I just look up at and offer a smile. I retreat my stare to the checkered hospital floor. I feel Gerard's worried stare fixated On me.
"So... Do you want to stay at my house for the night again Mikey while Gerard is in hospital?" Frank kindly offers.
"Yeah Mikey. You should. Our motel isnt exactly a safe place to stay. I've seen some creep around it." Gerard agrees. Looks like I don't have a choice.
We stay with Gerard for a few more hours. Mostly Gerard and Frank asking each other things while I stay quiet only talking when a question in my direction can't be answered with a nod or shake of my head.
A nurse I saw on my way to the toilet, came in to ask us to leave as visiting times were finishing and Gerard needed some rest. Frank and I got up. I went over to Gerard and hugged him. He was a little surprised but hugged back tightly whispering "I love you" into my ear. "I love you too Gerard" I whispered back and Then I turned around and headed to the door where Frank was standing waving at Gerard. We exited the building in silence and walked to Franks house not too far from the hospital thankfully. I kept my head down afraid he would notice the tears in my eyes which I was blinking away.
"Mikey. I hope you know you can trust Gerard and I. We care too much to let something like your happiness to pass by." Frank says after a few moments of thinking.
"I know Frank. Thank you." I say trying to say it as fast before my voice shows emotion. I want to sound strong. Who the fuck am I kidding? I'm Mikey Way. I'm not strong. I'm weak and pathetic and don't deserve Gerard or Frank because they are just too thoughtful. I shouldn't be on their minds at all.
"Anything at all. The bullies, the nightmares, your parents... your anorexia. You can talk about it to Gerard or me. We aren't gonna hate you at all. We just want to help." Frank adds making sure I understand.
"I don't have to tell Gerard anything. He already knows." I say quietly but with a snap that I regret.
"What do you mean?" Frank asks.
"I heard you talking about it all in the hospital" I reply hesitant at the beginning.
That shut him up. It wasn't that I was annoyed at him for it. I just wished that Gerard didn't know because he is probably worrying about. And it doesn't matter.
"I'm so sorry Mikey. I didn't know he wasn't aware of it. I would have kept it a secret until you were ready If I knew. I'm really sor-"
"It's fine" I cut him off bluntly. "doesn't even matter"
He stops walking. "Mikey. It does matter. To me and to Gerard. He is so worried about it all. You matter the whole world to him so please... on his behalf don't be afraid to talk to him. We both want to help." He says, stunned.
"... sorry." I apologise.
"For what exactly?"
"For being an asshole all the time. Not being able to stand up for myself and hings and don't try to defend me please. any 15 year old should be able to hold back tears when they're being shouted at, at least."
We reach his house and walk up the few steps to the door as he searches for his keys.
"Mikey, that's exactly it. You shouldn't be shouted at. No 15 gets shouted at constantly at school. You shouldn't be going through that. I swear Mikey, you are stronger than all of those jocks tanned muscles put together. If I were you I think I would have just given up" he says determined to make me believe him. He opens the door and we enter his house collapsing on his couch. I sigh.
"Want anything to eat or drink?" he asks.
"No thanks" I reply. He turns on the t.v. And we sit there. The odd tear rolling out from eyes. He looks over and then hugs. After a couple of minutes he pulls me down flat an we lie there watching the tv peacefully.
Thank you for reading. I'm not great at Mikey's POV but I hope you liked it. It wasn't extremely exciting or anything I know but I hope the next chapter will be better. Please leave a review and rate it!