FicWad: fresh-picked original and fan fiction

Categories > Original > Poetry

Sea.

"It twirls over the pebbles, caressing them with it's shine." A poem about the sea. Written because its currently my next door neighbour. Feedback? I would love some.

Category: Poetry - Rating: PG - Genres:  - Characters:  - Published: 2012/04/28 - Updated: 2012/04/30 - 232 words

Reviews

• Sea.

  (#) CosmicZombie 2012-05-03 11:30:52 AM

  This is wonderful; the ambiance is beautiful, yet dark at the same time. I also live by the sea, so I really felt this- I loved the way you made the rhythm almost like that of the waves on the beach- whether it was intended or not. But...yeah. I really like this. Very poetic, and I loved the darkness towards the end- it completed it perfectly.
  
  Oh, and I especially loved this verse:
  It twirls over the pebbles
  Caressing them with its shine
  Trickles between the valleys of rock
  Unperturbed by time
  
  Thanks for sharing!
  
  CosmicZombie xo

  Author's response

  Wow, thanks so much! I kinda wanted the rhythm to be like to waves so it's awesome you picked that out. I just love the sea but I've also seen the destruction it causes so I'm glad you like the darkness of the ending. Thank you.

Filter