'I just dealt with it, and when it got too much, I would go to my room, lock the door, and wait for the screaming inside my head to stop.'
As I am woken at precisely 6:50 am the next morning by my alarm clock beeping annoyingly loudly, I remind it - calmly and quietly - that it's not supposed to be waking up the entire neighbourhood... so why can't it just shut the fuck up? But it won't listen. Stupid technology.
I open my bleary eyes and as they try to adjust to the light seeping into the room under and around the faded curtains, I suddenly realise what day it is; I'm starting my new school today. And a certain cute guy with messy black hair and rockstar sunglasses will be there... Suddenly I'm looking forward to school a whole lot more than I would normally.
I've spent the hours since meeting Gerard for the first time trying to decide what to do about him. Yeah, he is gorgeous and adorably mental (and will probably be easy to persuade) but I want to have some fun with this one; usually I can get any guy - or girl - to fall at my feet simply by grinning at them cheekily... or casually slipping a note into their locker with a time and a place on it (Okay, yes, I am a slight whore- but who doesn't like to have some fun - and a quick fuck - every once in a while?) I want Gerard, and I want him to want me too, but this time, I want it to be different: I want to make him work for it. (a/n Jesus how many times can I use the word 'want' in a sentence) And I sure as hell don't plan on making it easy for him.
So my strategy is to seduce Gerard Way. And boy, am I gonna enjoy myself doing it....
I grin to myself as I slide out of bed, pull on some black skinnies and a t-shirt and head downstairs through the nearly empty house for breakfast.
"Morning honey" My mom smiles at me as I walk into the kitchen in search of some strong coffee and cereal. She's dressed smartly in a grey suit and scarily high, very shiny heels.
"Hey mom. What's with the suit?" I ask. Although my mother is - and has been for as long as I can remember - a secretary, I'm not used to seeing her look so... businesslike. She looks smart, professional.
"I've got an interview today", she replies, "in the city"
I cringe. When my mom says the city, she doesn't mean just anywhere in the city, she means one of the modern, seventy storey office block buildings that stand menacingly in the centre of the city. There are lots of different companies that operate there, and my stepdad - my mum's boyfriend - is the boss of one of the biggest.
I hate him. He'a great to my mom, but a complete asshole to me. Sure, when anyone else is around he acts civil towards me and can even be friendly on occasion. However this is only an act, a front so no one will suspect how much he truly hates me; as soon as we're alone, he orders me around like a slave, shouts and swears at me, tells me I'm just a worthless fag who my mom only pretends to love, et cetera, et cetera....
Of course, no one else has any idea about our 'turbulent' relationship. And I intend to keep it that way. I just deal with it, and when it gets too much, I just go to my room, lock the door, and wait for the screaming inside my head to stop.
As long as no one ever finds out, I can just keep putting up with him until I'm old enough to move out. I just have to stick it out for now. For mom's sake.
"Well good luck" I force a smile.
“Thanks Frankie, I’ll see you later. There’s plenty of food in the fridge if you’re hungry before I get back, and there’s money in the usual-“
“Mum, I’ll be fine”, I reassure her, “now go, before I make you late!”
She smiles and gives me a quick hug, “Okay, bye honey!”
Once she's left, I grab some food, pour myself a large mug of deliciously steamy, hot coffee and after gulping down the burning hot liquid, grab my school bag and head out the door onto the grimy street that leads to the school. Today is definitely going to be more interesting than the average school day...
“Mikey! Hurry up; we’re going to be late!” I moan at my brother as I frantically shove my books and iPod into my scruffy school bag.
I spent the rest of the yesterday with the image of Frank’s face grinning down at me in my head and I still can't get him out of my thoughts. He's just so amazing; his hair, his eyes, his mouth, his skinny but clearly toned body...
I snap out of my daydream.
“Gerard, I thought you were in a rush?” Mikey states, clearly annoyed that I have dragged him out of bed early so we can get to school on time for once. Only because for once, I actually have a reason to go in; Frank is going to be there, and Ray and I are going to be ‘looking after’ him.
“Yeah, I am. Let’s go”
Mikey and I grab our stuff, head out the door, and begin our tediously long walk to school. As we finally reach the tall grey buildings of our ‘educational institution’, Mikey slows down, his eyes glued to his phone as he quickly texts someone. Probably either Ray - who is good friends with my brother as well as me – or some girl he's trying to hook up with. I just look eagerly ahead, searching for a certain golden eyed boy and his beautiful white guitar.
And I'm not unlucky: leaning smugly against a chipped, ‘depression grey’ wall is Frank – already looking around as if he practically owns the place, despite the fact that his first day has barely begun. I hope he's prepared for the shit he's gonna get for dressing and acting like he does. I mean, I'm used to it, but then I had been surviving it for my entire life in this hell hole. He's still dressed in the same black skinny jeans as before, however his shirt has been swapped for a bright red and black Hoodie which covers an iron maiden t-shirt. Ray would be proud. After studying his perfectness for a while, I decide he's probably quite nervous, it being his first day and all, so I walk straight up to him and force on my best ‘happy’ smile.
“Hey Frank” I say quietly, not wanting to scare him.
“Hey sexyyy” he replies smoothly. I just stand there, slightly shocked and lost for words. I mean, I know I've only just met the guy, but I can’t help being pleased that he seems happy to see me. Or is he just messing with me...mocking me and making me seem stupid and immature? I can’t tell. I hope to god it's the first one, but deeply suspect it's the second.
However, just as I am panicking about what to reply to him, I'm shocked once again by him and his mysteriousness as he suddenly grins at me, turns away and saunters off in the opposite direction, towards the entrance of the school.
I turn my head slightly to take a look behind me, careful to make sure Gerard can’t see me looking back at him. I'm amused at how easy it has been to shock him; the instant I let the words slip out of my mouth, I saw a change in his eyes. Hopefully I'm doing a good job of attracting his attention so far; I just have to make sure I don't make it too easy.
I stride into the school office and have an extremely tiresome conversation with the secretary about timetables before heading to what I have just found out is my homeroom. I'm already late as I push open the door and walk into the room, a sea of faces staring right back at me as I walk to the back of the class. Great. This is going to be fun.