“Brendon, what are you doing?” I asked, concerned. I knew he was probably calling Ryan to come get him but I didn’t want to be alone. I also didn’t want Ryan coming by. “You can stay here for tonight, you know.”
“You sure? I’m sure Ry—”
“It’s fine; we can stay up and just watch movies or sing at the top of our lungs or something.”
Brendon laughed. “What about your dad and brother?”
“They’re at the hospital again.” He nodded and I led him into the house. “I’ve got some pajamas you can borrow.”
“You’re a girl?”
I laughed and opened the door. “Guy’s sleep pants are better.” He followed me inside and we went up to my room. I pulled out some pajamas for him to borrow and directed him to the bathroom. I lay down on my bed, turned the TV on and was asleep before Brendon came back in.
I awoke to my alarm buzzing. I rolled over to see Brendon cuddling one of my pillows. I almost laughed out loud until I saw what time it was. 7:20 - we were going to be late for school.
“Brendon,” I shook him a little. “Brendon, get up, we’re gonna be late.” He moaned and rolled off the side of the bed, landing on the hardwood floor. I rolled my eyes. “I’ll go get you something of Danny’s to wear.”
I walked into Danny’s room and started searching through his drawers. I found a shirt and had moved into his closet for some jeans when I heard a car pull up. “Shit! Brendon, stay in my room,” I called out to him.
What were my father and Danny doing home? Usually when they stayed the night at the hospital they didn’t come home until around lunchtime. I ran to the front door and threw it open, but it wasn’t Danny or my dad, it was Ryan. For a moment I just stood in the doorway, eyes wide. What was he doing here?
“Can we talk?” he asked. I nodded my head and walked outside with him, closing the door behind me. He sat down on the front steps and I followed. I could feel his eyes on me as he stared. “Is everything alright?” I looked into his eyes and nodded. “So why have you been avoiding me?”
I sighed; I actually had to speak to answer that. “I don’t know.” I lied, unsuccessfully. Ryan could read me like a book.
“It’s because of that nightmare you had, isn’t it?” I felt tears well in my eyes and turned away from him. “Kenzie, you don’t have to worry about me judging you.”
It took me a while before I spoke. “Why is it that I’m so terrified of her dying, but you can face your father with such bravery?” I pulled my knees to my chest. “I just don’t want anyone to know how scared I really am.” It felt good to finally admit how terrified I was. I’d been keeping everything bottled up. My tears fell freely and Ryan pulled me close, rubbing my back soothingly.
“It’s okay to be scared. I’ve told you that before. Being scared is normal.”
My breath was coming in gasps now. “But...I’m scared...I don’t want...her to leave...I want...things to...go back to normal!”
For ten minutes we stayed in that position, me crying into his shirt and him comforting me, and for once in my life I didn’t pull away. I had cried in front of others before, but never like this. Never had I poured all of my fears out, draining my heart.
Once I had calmed down Ryan helped me up. “You need something to take your mind off of your mom. Brendon, Spencer, Jon, and I are playing at this party Saturday, you should come with us.”
“I don’t know Ry...” I tried to come up with an excuse but he wouldn’t have it.
“You’re coming with us; I’m not taking no for an answer. Now come on, it’s almost 8. You need to get dressed.” I nodded and opened the door.
When I walked into my room I found Brendon dancing around crazily, listening to my iPod, wearing my red skinny jeans. I stared for a moment, speechless before I started laughing to the point where I couldn’t breathe. He stopped abruptly, a deep red tinting his features.
“Oh, hey Kenzie...looks like we’re the same size!”
The day of the party arrived and we were all really nervous. It was the first time Kenzie was going to hear us play. Well, she had heard us play before, but this time was different; this time she wouldn’t be the only one in the audience.
I pulled up to her house, the guys in the car with me. She walked outside but she was dressed normally. She didn’t look like she was ready for a party at all. I got out of the car and ushered her back inside. “You’re going to a party; you need to look like it.”
Brendon, Spencer, and Jon followed us inside and sat down in the living room. “Hurry up Ry, we’re going to be late!” I heard Brendon call to me as we walked up the stairs.
“I don’t understand what the big deal is, I look fine!” she said as we entered her room.
“Kenz you are going to a party to forget about your problems for a little while. To do that you need to get in a party mood.” She still looked skeptical. I sighed, “Just trust me.”
I looked through her closet and pulled out a dark blue skirt that looked like the night sky and some black heels. I moved onto her drawers and found a simple yellow-orange tank top. “Now go put these on.”
While Kenzie was putting on the outfit I picked out, I went downstairs to grab my makeup. Jon and Spencer always poked fun at the fact that I knew how to apply makeup and was fairly good at it. I didn’t mind though. I knew they were only joking and even so, I liked doing it and that was all that mattered.
When I reentered Kenzie’s room she looked uncomfortable. “You don’t wear skirts often do you?” I asked her.
She laughed quietly. “Not really,” she admitted.
I held up my makeup bag and told her to sit down while I worked on her face. When I finished I looked at what I had done. Her right eye had swirls of blue and white shimmer eye shadow with white dots placed at various intervals. The left eye was outlined in yellow with orange shading to match her shirt. It looked like the sun and moon - exactly the effect I was going for. I smiled and brought her downstairs. “Aren’t you going to let me see myself in the mirror?”
“Not yet.” I told her. We went into the living where the guys sat and they all gasped as she entered the room.
“Hot damn, Kenz, you look great!” Brendon exclaimed. And he was right, she did look great. The blue really brought out her eyes, making the brown in her irises pop. Her nearly waist-length red-brown hair flowed down her back in elegant waves. She smiled and her eyes lit up as the boys ogled her, and I had a feeling that they wouldn’t be the only ones that night.
I smiled at what Ryan had done for me. I hadn’t really been that excited before. I mean, I’d never even been to a party before. I only said yes because Ryan wanted me to go. I didn’t care that I had no idea what he did with my makeup; it must have looked fantastic to have Brendon looking at me like that. It would be a lie to say that I didn’t think that Brendon was attractive. He certainly had good looks but he was only like a brother to me, as were the rest of the boys.
We walked outside and I caught my reflection in the hood of Ryan’s car. Now I could understand why the guys had looked at me the way they did. The graceful swirls of blue and gold that adorned my face were magnificent! I reached up to touch them but Ryan stopped me.
“It’ll smear,” he said. I smiled and thanked him.
When we reached the location of the party Jon and Spencer immediately started unloading the equipment while Brendon, Ryan, and I walked inside. Ryan said they had to go talk to the guy who hired them, so they left me alone. I was lost, I didn’t know anyone. I thought that maybe I would have been more confident but I wasn’t.
I walked around the edges of the room as the crowd of people grew larger. The room felt too loud. I could hear the sounds of Jon and Ryan warming up mixed with the conversations of partygoers. Suddenly I heard Brendon’s voice, “Hey everyone, we’re Panic! At the Disco!” That was new. They’d never told me what their band was called. It suited them though. They launched into a song and I smiled at the familiar notes.
I looked around at the rest of the guests and felt out of place. Everyone there knew someone, but I didn’t. No one was dressed the way I was; my makeup was wilder than everyone else’s. I was about to retreat to the nearest bathroom when someone tapped me on the shoulder.
I turned and saw a guy who looked to be about my age. He had short, dark brown hair and the most brilliant blue eyes. There was a stud in his nose and two in his lips. He was much taller than me and even skinnier than Ryan. I blushed when I realized I’d been staring and he chuckled. “I’m Micah,” he told me by way of introduction.
“Kenzie,” I squeaked out.
He smiled. “A pretty name for an even prettier face.” I blushed at his compliment. “Sorry, that sounded cheesy. I just saw you from across the room and thought you looked beautiful. Would you like a drink?”
I nodded my head, not trusting myself to speak. Micah took my hand and led me through the crowd to where the tap was. He handed me a red plastic cup of beer and my eyes widened. He laughed at my reaction.
“What’s the matter, never drunk alcohol before?”
“Not really, no,” I admitted quietly.
He put the cup in my hand and whispered in my ear, “One cup won’t hurt anyone Kenzie.” What else could I do but melt as his silky sweet voice whispered my name?
Ohmygosh I am so incredibly sorry that it's taken me so long to put out another chapter. I've stressed this in all of my other stories but I'll say it again, I've been studying like crazy for my EOCs and finals so I haven't had that much time to write. My last exam is tomorrow and then I'm done for the year so my chapters should be a little more frequent. Also I've already got half of the next chapter written out so I should be done with it soon. Hope y'all liked this chapter! Please rate and review, I love the feedback!