Its Ritsuka's birthday, and he's made a wish. But that wish is so special to him that he won't jinx it by telling anyone what it was - not even Soubi. Slight Soubi/Ritsuka
By: youkai_girl AKA eternalsailorsolarwind
Disclaimer: Loveless and all of its characters are owned by Yun Kouga. I just watch, read, and play with them.
A/N: This is my first Loveless fic, and I'm hoping to keep them at least somewhat in character. Slightly Soubi x Ritsuka. Little bit of angst floating around.
The party was over, and Soubi was walking Ritsuka home from Yuiko-chan's apartment. The taller girl had been determined to give Ritsuka a birthday party, since it was in the middle of summer vacation, and no amount of telling the cheerful girl "no" worked. So, in the end, Ritsuka had given in, and the party had been thrown.
It was small, with only Yuiko, Yayoi-san, and Soubi there besides Ritsuka himself. He'd had fun, though. He'd made lots of memories with his camera, using up the spare memory card that Soubi had gotten him as a gift, along with the totally empty one he'd already had in the camera.
There had been other presents, but the memory card had been his favorite. Yuiko had made sure that there was birthday cake and ice cream enough for them all, and when the time came, Ritsuka had blown out the candles, making the expected wish as he did so. All three of them wanted to know what he wished for, but he'd refused to tell them, saying that if he did, it wouldn't come true. And the wish he'd made was one that he would have given anything to come true. So he wasn't going to jinx it for anyone, not his friends or Soubi. No matter how many times Soubi asked him.
Soubi's voice startled him out of his thoughts, making him trip over his own feet, "Did you have a good time, Ritsuka?"
Ritsuka looked up at the older man who'd reached out and prevented him from falling, "Didn't you?"
Soubi smiled back down at him, eyes mischievous, "Of course I did, Ritsuka. I was with you."
Flushing deeply at the Fighter's words, Ritsuka looked away. "Idiot. As if I have to be with you for you to enjoy yourself."
The blonde man considered this. "Perhaps not. But I prefer it if you are there, Ritsuka."
Something in the tone of Soubi's voice made the still-blushing teen look back at him. He realized that Soubi was talking about something more than just a Fighter and Sacrifice relationship, more even than master and servant. But...he didn't understand what Soubi was getting at. Frustrated, Ritsuka looked away again.
"I'm still not going to tell you what I wished for," he muttered.
It didn't take them long after that to reach Ritsuka's house. Going in the door, he knew that Soubi would climb onto the balcony to wait for him in his bedroom. After skirting past his mother, managing to deflect her demand that he eat dinner now, he escaped to the safety of his bedroom. Ritsuka was not willing to attempt to eat what his mother made for him with Soubi actually in the house. Soubi may have given his word that he would leave her alone, but Soubi had broken promises before. And Ritsuka suspected that if Soubi actually saw or heard her throwing dishes at him, his Fighter would step in.
Opening his bedroom door, Ritsuka was unsurprised to see Soubi sitting on his bed, lighting a cigarette. Ritsuka didn't bother telling Soubi off for smoking in his room. He knew it wouldn't make a difference, as no matter how many times he'd ordered the blonde to quit, he'd still see Soubi lighting up. Sighing, Ritsuka put his bag down, and sorted through it to find his camera. He wanted to upload those memories as soon as possible.
Ritsuka could feel the pale blue eyes on him as he booted up the computer. He looked back at Soubi, "What?"
"I'm not going to tell you what I wished for, so don't ask."
Scowling, Ritsuka turned back to the computer. Soubi was making him tense. Sorting through all the memories on the memory cards, he deleted a couple were out of focus enough that he wouldn't be able to remember anything if he looked at them. Feeling a presence, he turned to his left. His eyes widened as he saw Soubi less than three inches away, kneeling next to him. Before he could say anything, the older man leaned in and kissed him.
Ritsuka sat stock still, feeling that strange warm and fluttery sensation he always felt when Soubi kissed him. After a moment, the blonde man pulled back, eyes half-lidded. Knowing he was blushing already, Ritsuka felt it darken more as Soubi smiled, a little knowingly, at him.
"What?" he barked at the Fighter, embarrassed.
"Ritsuka, what did you wish for?" asked Soubi him calmly, moving to sit on the floor next to the chair.
Ignoring Soubi's question, Ritsuka glanced around the room, playing for time. His eyes lit on one of the bulletin board of memories; half of which was of Soubi, the rest of Seimei. His lips tightened with a surge of anger; it was instinctive to pair the two on the board, no matter how much it hurt to do so. Soubi wasn't really his, after all. Only willed to him after his brother's death. He had no one that was his. Not his parents, not Soubi. Not even himself.
His eyes came to rest on a particularly favorite memory of his brother, and his lips softened into a fond smile. It was their last trip to the beach together before Seimei...died. Seimei was smiling, holding up a large seashell that he had found, offering it to the Ritsuka that was off camera. Behind him, the setting sun was reflected on the smooth, glassy surface of the ocean. It was a beautiful picture of his brother, and the way he wanted to remember him.
"I told you, Soubi," Ritsuka whispered, still looking at the picture. "If I tell you my wish, it won't come true."
Glancing back at his Fighter, the boy saw the pale eyes flick to the same bulletin board. The usual smile appeared on the adult's face. This time, however, Ritsuka could see that the smile didn't really touch the eyes themselves. "I love you, Ritsuka."
Ritsuka looked away, frowning. "Stop lying, Soubi."
"I'm not lying, Ritsuka."
"You only say that because Seimei ordered you to," seethed the teen.
Soubi said nothing, only smiled that false smile at him.
Ritsuka looked away, "Go home, Soubi. I don't want to see you anymore tonight." His voice sounded weary to his own ears. He couldn't deal with this tonight.
"Is that an order, Ritsuka?"
Soubi gracefully stood up, gave Ritsuka another soft kiss, and retreated to the balcony. "Call me if you need me, Ritsuka."
Ritsuka followed him out to the balcony, "Idiot. Just be careful, Soubi. No more fighting alone!"
This time, the smile was real, Ritsuka could feel it. "As my master wishes. Good night, Ritsuka. Happy birthday." And then Soubi was gone.
Unable to help himself, Ritsuka smiled. Before today, he couldn't remember being told to have a happy birthday. He liked hearing it. Returning to his room, the smile slowly congealed, slipping from his face.
Wishes. How could he tell Soubi - or anyone, for that matter - what he wished for? Ritsuka knew what Soubi thought he wished for - Seimei to come back from the dead. Or for the real Ritsuka to come back from wherever it was he went to. But today, he wanted to be selfish. He wanted something for himself. Just this once. Something that was only for him.
Hanging his head, Ritsuka thought, Soubi, how can I tell you that what I wished for wasn't for Seimei or the real Ritsuka to come back, but for you to really mean it when you tell me you love me? That's all I want. For you to /really /be mine.