I sat on the side-lines as Hazel was teaching Isabella's swimming class. Isabella was out of town on vacation and Hazel was covering for her. Now I could see what Jon meant by unfit. Some of the actors were pretty big. And when I say big, I mean BIG! But I'm not one to judge. I was just happy to be back with Hazel, hanging out like we had done so many times when we were younger.
"So, how come you're not going to the first day of filming?" Hazel asked, taking a seat beside me as the class did laps. I never took my eyes off the water, watching it sway back and fore, being tugged back and fore made me think about myself. I was in a battle of being tugged back and fore.
"I don't want him to see me." I admitted. "Plus, Mel isn't filming today." I did have my first excuse of the day sorted; Mel wasn't actually filming. But she had still begged me to bring her to the studio because she liked to keep her attendance by showing up to every day of filming, no matter what was going on.
"You let Mel go watch by herself?" It did make me sound like a bad mother, letting my ten-year-old wander around by herself. But it wasn't like that
"But Jon said he'd take good care of my little girl on set." It wasn't a lie. I trusted Jon with my life. I could trust him with Mel. "This way I won't have to face...That guy." Hazel giggled at the fact I refused to say his name. I didn't say his name because I hated him or anything like that. It was just that every time I did, it hurt a little on the inside. And I didn't want to be afflicted with pain.
I was happily watching the filming of the movie from off on the side. Jon let me sit in his director chair. I felt so special. On stage was Ryan and Eloise, the lady who was playing my mom in the film. She was an 'experienced' actress. I'd like to see when that part of her kicks in. She was pretty old-at least thirty-with long black ringlets and empty grey eyes. Over all, she was old. They were currently filming the scene when they realize Destiny-me-has been kidnapped.
Mom had refused to come to set with me. I know that watching the filming is boring, but I wanted her to be with me. I liked having my mom with me on the first day, it was a home comfort. But she insisted that she had more pressing matters to deal with, so I was left in Jon's care for the day.
"Lydia, darling, please calm down." Ryan grasped Eloise by the wrists, pulling her face just inches from his own. For a moment I thought they were gonna kiss, and if they had, I would have bitch slapped that girl. But they didn't. How lucky for her that was.
"CALM DOWN?" Eloise shouted as if the idea of it was preposterous, breaking free from Ryan's clutches. "OUR DAUGHTER HAS GONE MISSING AND YOU WANT ME TO CALM DOWN!" Ryan pulled Eloise close to him again. I was trying to look for any objects Eloise's hair could 'accidently' get caught in.
"CUT!" Jon yelled at them. Eloise broke free once again and gave Ryan the coldest look I had ever seen. I really wanted to hurt her. Badly! It wasn't that I had a problem with having to share Ryan with someone else; it was the fact of having to share Ryan with her.
Whilst thinking of putting Eloise through a meat grinder, Ryan walked up to me. Ever since we'd met two days previous, we'd been pretty close. Mom actually believed me when I told her that I'd met him, which I was shocked about. She usually told me to stop fibbing (that's a fancy word for lying). For some reason she refused to come meet him, though. And she had warned me to stay away from him too. Good luck with that one, mom.
"Hey, Mel." Ryan greeted. "Enjoying the show?" He asked.
"Yeah," I answered sarcastically. "Eloise is just a ball of sunshine next to you!" I gave my cutest smile to Ryan and he laughed in reply.
"At least I'm not the only one who hates her." So Ryan hated her, also. I could already see the next few months of filming becoming better and better in my mind. If Eloise was determined to stick to this part, and I knew she was, then she was going to have a lot to deal with to keep it.
"Hate her? I'm far past hating her. I wanna put her in the meat grinder!" I told him, imagining the thought in my head. Ryan only laughed harder at me. I loved making people laughed, it was what I lived to do.
"I can't wait till I start filming." I explained. "I love getting in on the action. This movie has a lot of action for me!" I was being kidnapped; of course I got to be in on some of the action! It was only the first day of filming and the costume department had 'accidently' lost my clothes. They had to make up a whole new batch just for me before I could begin filming. It sucked that took so little care of them, but at least I got to check out my co-stars skills before I made my debut.
I was rolling on the floor, laughing my head off. Mel was slumped against the wall laughing along with me. I had never known one little girl to have such a devious mind. The two of us made a pretty good team. Mel loved to play pranks-just like me-and wanted to prank Eloise-just like me. So, we replaced all the shampoo in her bathroom with honey and stole all but one towel for her.
"I QUIT!" Eloise yelled at Jon. She was standing just at the other side of the wall and we had to use our hand to muffle each other's laughter. Her black hair looked like it was leaking and the towel was drenched a buttered yellow. Mel and I were pissing ourselves laughing just thinking about what we had done. And looking at her helped too.
"Great. That's just great." Jon mumbled to himself. I watched him as he slumped down into his director's chair. "Just who am I gonna get to replace Eloise now?" Before I knew it, Mel had run up to him. I followed behind, clutching my ribs as I got to my feet.
"My mom'll do it." She told him. I'd never met Mel's mom in the whole two day's we'd known each other. With a daughter like Mel, I thought her mother would be laid back, up for a laugh. I mean, look at Mel. That girl is a wild child and she knows how to have fun in any situation.
"Mel, it's ok-" Jon started, but Mel didn't pay any attention to him. She was already heading off in the direction of the gym, yelling back to Jon, "I'll go ask!"
"You guys did brilliantly." Hazel told her class as they walked off to the get dried off. I found myself giggling about what I had witnessed in the past hour. It had been so funny. Half the class couldn't swim properly and the other half though they could swim better than they actually could. "Quit laughing!" Hazel scolded me, but she was laughing herself. That was one of the great things about having my best friend back; having someone to laugh with. For so long it was just me and Aunt Sophie. And then Mel started becoming a comedian and it was fun to laugh with her, but it wasn't the same.
"Mooooooooooooooom!" I heard Mel's voice scream through the whole gym. I looked up and she was running towards me from the other side
"Don't run!" I yelled. Too late. By the time I'd shouted to her, Mel was on the floor. Running by a swimming pool, did she ever listen to me? I ran over to my daughter's side, almost falling myself, but as I got there, so did another person. And not just any person.
"Mel, are you okay?" Ryan asked, gently raising her head off the floor.
"I'm fine." She groaned, holding her hand to her head. He seemed to know what he was doing and Mel looked fine, so I tried my best to focus on hiding my face in my hair.
"Are you sure, that was a pretty nasty fall?" Ryan actually sounded...Concerned for her? But my mind was racing with other things to worry about his voice. I tried to not make eye-contact, though it was quite hard not to want to look at him. This was the moment I had been dreading all along and all I wanted to do was crawl into his arms like I had done so many times before. But all those memories seemed distant, as if I would never have them back. Because I wouldn't. I was still trying to avoid him.
Ryan stood up and held out his hand to Mel. She took it and he helped her up. I stayed on the floor, hoping he wouldn't notice me. That plan failed quite easily. Ryan extended his hand out to me and it would only have been too rude to not accept it.
"Hey I'm..." But his voice trailed off as my face came into focus through his eyes. "Amanda?"
"No, I'm Amanda. You're Ryan." I told him, trying to lighten the moment. It didn't work. However, Mel changed the subject fast enough for it too fell less awkward for a moment or so.
"Mom, Jon's looking for a new actress for the part of my mom." She sounded too excited about that. "I told him you'd do it. Because you will, won't you?" That was why. She was jumping around excitedly, whilst Ryan and I were just frozen to the spot. I directed my attention to her, biting my lip and thinking about the whole situation we were in.
"Mel, I-I have my own work to think about and then you and life and-" Her puppy dog eyes drew me short, looking at me so innocently with her honey wonders. I sighed, caving. I always caved. "I don't know...You tell Jon that I'll think about it." Mel gave me an extremely tight squeeze around the waist and then ran off. "WALK!" I shouted after her, but she was too excited to hear a word I said.
"Ryan?" She called my name, but it sounded like a whisper. It was a dream that I couldn't quite shake from my mind. But it was a fresh dream, one I had never had before. "Ryan, come on, talk to me." I was in a state of shock, not knowing what would come out of my mouth if I tried to speak. The girl I had been waiting for my whole life was standing in front of me. Ten years had passed without a single word and now...
My head was spinning, not able to process the information fast enough for my liking. I felt nausea overhauling my body and dizziness starting to kick in. Then nothing but darkness.
I had the weirdest dream. It was the first day of filming and my co-stars mother was my long lost love. I couldn't place it in the dream memory bank as I rarely ever had new dreams; they were old replays from my days with Amanda. And this new one seemed decent enough, too. But as my eyes fluttered open and I registered the squeaky cleanness that wasn't my bedroom, I was starting to feel leery.
"EASY!" I heard Hazel say, placing her arms around my torso to help me sit up. "You had a nasty fall yesterday." She then glanced behind her, propping my pillows up to support me. I couldn't see what had caught her attention at first, but then she moved away and I could see all too clearly. There, sitting on the chair, was Amanda. Amanda McKenna. The girl I had been in love with for the past ten years. She was fast asleep on the chair beside my bed in the infirmary.
Her slightly tanned skin was as smooth as ever. Glistening, almost. The auburn locks that used to hang by her shoulders were now slightly longer, but not noticeable to anyone who hadn't spent every day of ten years imagining her in their mind. When I looked closely at her baby-like face I could still see the freckles that I was so eagerly attracted to across the bridge of her nose. The same way Mel's were. Mel. She had no idea what was going on between her mother and I. Or at least what had gone on between us. Mel. She was ten-years-old. Ten years ago I had been with Amanda! I wasn't one to jump to conclusions, but my blood was pumping in my ears and I could feel my heart breaking free of my chest. Was Mel my daughter?