He was mine.
I waited nervously, hoping he’d reply.
Brendon looked surprised. I wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or something that would have the potential to crush me. What did he want? Why wouldn’t he just say it?
“Can I sit down?” Brendon finally asked.
“Yeah.” I mumbled, scooting over. “I’m sorry, I can actually move… I was just lying here because-“ I didn’t finish my sentence, deciding not to lie about it. I was laying here because I loved the smell of Brendon and I wanted to be closer to him. I wanted to be as close as possible to anything involving him.
“I like it that I found you here.” Brendon said, sitting next to me. “I don’t want this to be over and I’m ready to try to make this work too because I want to be with you. I can’t imagine being with anyone else. I could never feel the same way about anyone ever again.”
Those words soothed my fears but only temporarily. We still had so much work left to do. I leaned back but Brendon sat in place, looking too nervous to move. We sat together like that for a while, not saying anything, not moving.
Time passed slowly and still neither of us had spoken. It was kind of nice just sitting there, not having to fight to think of something to say. We’d both said what we needed to and now we were just there, simply existing.
Rumbling from my stomach broke the silence and Brendon chuckled, “I guess that means I need to get off my ass and feed you.”
I meant to laugh but no noise came out as I shrugged, “I could make something. Are you hungry?”
“Let me.” Brendon stood up first. I stayed in place, hoping that I was smiling in return. I meant to be but I was still in a cloud of worry. I didn’t want to mess up. We’d taken a step closer to actual happiness but we still weren’t there. We had a lot of wounds to heal. “Do you want to put a movie on or something?” Brendon called, as he walked towards the kitchen.
“Sure.” I stood, feeling a little light-headed. How long had it been since I’d eaten? Usually I was constantly eating but lately I’d been more stressed and though I’d meant to… I forgot to eat sometimes.
I could hear clattering in the kitchen as I searched through Jon’s DVD collection. Nothing really looked that great but I finally decided on a movie I’d never heard of before.
I slipped it on but didn’t start it as I walked to the kitchen to see what Brendon had going on. “What are you making?”
“Um… it seems we are going to be having some Mac n cheese.” Brendon looked around nervously, “It’s all I could really find. I could go out and grab something…”
“Mac n Cheese sounds good to me.” I was starving, plus Mac n cheese was universally accepted. Well, usually. I’d never turned it down before… and Jon made it a lot so that was saying something.
“Great.” Brendon smiled, filling the pot with water from the fridge. “Did ya find a movie?”
“Yeah, one of Jon’s. I’m not sure what it’s about.” I’d honestly just randomly grabbed it, hoping it was good. I wasn’t too concerned though. I’d be more focused on Brendon than I would be on the movie.
The mac n cheese didn’t take long to cook but Brendon undercooked the noodles and they were hard. I put pepper on it, ignoring just how hard they actually were. “It’s great.” I lied.
Brendon nodded, scarfing down his bowl full. “Thanks. I should start cooking more often. What do you think?” Oh god.
“That would be great.” Just no meat evidently, only things that can be undercooked… and we can live through eating.
I sat down on the small booth like couch in the living room and Brendon sat next to me. “Did you want to go out for ice cream later? I mean, what kind of cravings have you been having lately?”
“Honestly, everything. I’m pretty sure Spencer’s kept a list.” I laughed, thinking of all the food Spencer had gotten me during my pregnancy.
Brendon nodded but said nothing. I saw the way his eyes darkened and it made me sad. It was like I’d turned friends against each other and I didn’t like that at all, I’d never meant to do that. “Spencer is a really great friend.” I commented, wanting to lighten the situation.
“He’s …” Brendon trailed off before restarting his response, “You’re right, he is a great friend.”
Then I started the movie.
I should have known that something would go wrong.
I mean, why would Brendon and I be able to have a normal night alone, like a normal married couple? That would just be uncalled for.
All too nakedly Jon appeared on the screen, waving quickly. “I love you baby.” He spoke in to the camera. “And this…” He gestured to his fully hardened cock, “Is all for you.”
“Turn it off.” I choked out, dropping my bowl of mac n cheese. “Oh god, turn it off.”
Brendon was laughing so hard that I wasn’t sure if he could even breathe. Jon continued to talk as he… No, I wasn’t even going to go there.
“And we all wondered how Jon and his girlfriend kept it romantic while tour was going on.” Brendon commented, with the television now off.
“I’m never picking a movie again.” I replied, attempting to clean the mess I’d made.
Brendon helped me.
Our fingers touched and we stopped, staring up at each other. “Mine is all yours too baby.” He teased, ruining the moment.
It didn’t take long to clean up the mac n cheese. Brendon went outside to call Jon. I was sure he just wanted to taunt him though he used the cover of wanting to protect my sanity despite the fact that the damage had already been done.
I didn’t want to look for another movie so instead I decided to shower while waiting for Brendon to come back in. The warm water felt good, washing away my worries along with the physical dirt.
The shower didn’t last long enough for all of my hurt feelings to go down the drain but it was a good beginning.
Unfortunately once I was out I immediately checked my phone, itching to call Spencer. Old habits would die hard. Spencer was my bad habit, the one I needed desperately, and the one that would wreck my life with Brendon. I couldn’t go back to that, not after making such a drastic step. Brendon and I had made a change. We were trying to make things right.
We could do this.
“Jon apologized.” Brendon said, causing me to jump and hold the towel tighter to my body.
Brendon laughed, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you. I thought you heard me come back in.”
“I showered.” I unnecessarily pointed out.
“Are you trying to hint that I should too?” Brendon asked, raising an eyebrow.
“No, I was just letting you know.”
“The fact that you’re wrapped in a towel lets me know.” Brendon teased.
“You know one craving that I’ve had all throughout my pregnancy that I’ve been unable to quench so far?” I suddenly asked as my heart picked up in speed, and butterflies fluttered in my chest.
“You.” I pressed my lips against Brendon’s before he could respond.
I’d gone far too long without Brendon. I wasn’t going to let anything come between me and what I wanted anymore. I wanted Brendon.
He was mine.
(Just a heads up; the next chapter is going to jump forward! Things are going to change dramatically and there will still be drama because what is a story of romance without drama? Plus, the entire Kacy/Brendon/Spencer thing will finally amount to something!)