The memories of last night start to haunt Mikey.
I awoke to the aroma of cannabis and alcohol, no surprise there. I really had tried to stop but if it wasn't for my brother I wouldn't be like this, it's stupid really. I mean my life is ok, I have my new life in LA away from bad memories like the mugging, Maria, Moms death. Mainly Maria.
She was such a beautiful girl but she was never mine always Gerard's! I don't know why he left her, he didn't deserve a girl like her, I did.
The way her long black hair blew in the breeze. Her slim frame and tattooed arms, she was perfect. Well she was. Not now though. She let Gerard knock her up and leave! That was 18 years ago, I don't know why we are back in Jersey it doesn't feel right. Just then my phone went off.
"Hey Gerard, what's up?"
"What's up? What's fucking up?! Umm, let's see you tried to kill the mother of my daughter last night!"
"What are you talking about I haven't seen Maria since YOU left!"
"Is that why you stabbed her last night!? I'm in the hospital with her now! The doctors don't know if she will make it!" I could hear the sadness and pain in his voice, there was a reason why he left Maria. I was the reason. I should have never came between them but I couldn't help myself. She was so perfect and out of reach.
The memories of last night started flowing into place, we were at a party round Franks and Gerard's friend gave me Cannabis. But when did I go round to Maria's? She can't still be living in the same place. Can she?
"Mikey! You fucking there?! I swear to god this time you've fucking messed up! I told you never to take that stuff again!"
His words angered me. Who was he to tell me what to do!
"If it wasn't for you I wouldn't even be in this fucking mess!" And with that I hung up.
Sometimes I just wish I could block him and the guys out of my life, that's sort of impossible when I'm with them almost 24 hours a day. Well except last night.
What the fuck have I done