"Do you have any fucking idea what you do to him?"...... Frank stands up for Gerard.
Title from You Me At Six, hope you enjoy! :)
Chapter 15- Little Bit Of Truth
I don't think I'll ever fully understand why Gerard wanted to kill himself that night or what he's been through, but I don't really think any of that really matters. All that matters is that he has someone to look out for him, make sure he's okay. In a way, I like to think that I'm that someone.
It has been two weeks after all, and he does appear to be feeling better. He's laughing more and he and Mikey are talking properly again. Although, he hasn't improved in the fact that he's still not eating enough. No matter how many times we try to get him to eat, he just refuses. Apart from that he's been great and I've started getting more out of him conversation-wise. We actually have a lot in common, and he is awesome.
I have to say, in the two weeks since the night that Gerard confided in me, my feelings for him have grown. I know it's a bit soon to be thinking like this, but I really am falling for him and I think I like it. Of course, I know nothing can ever happen because he's Mikey's brother... Plus he would never like me in that way. But as long as Gerard's happy, I'm happy, it's just really nice seeing that beautiful smile of his.
My eyes roam the school hallway that I'm currently walking down in search of Gerard. I know he's in today because he walked to school with Mikey and I this morning. It's weird, I normally see him after math class... With a shrug of my shoulders, I continue walking to my next class. When I reach the end of the hallway, I see a group of jocks in a circle, clearly surrounding somebody. When I hear them speak, I freeze on the spot.
"Look at Gay Way, he's so pathetic." One of the meat heads who I think is called Ronnie, laughs. Really? Gay Way? How original...
"Hey, fatass, how's your boyfriend? What's his name, Frank?" Ronnie's friend, who I know to be called Max sneers at Gerard.
"He's not my boyfriend." I can barely hear Gerard's voice over the laughter of the assholes blocking me from him.
"Oh, whatever. Just do us all a favour and go slit your wrists and die, you pathetic faggot!" Ronnie emphasizes his statement with a rather hard punch to Gerard's face, knocking him into the lockers behind him. Upon seeing Gerard bleed, Ronnie and his three friends walk away laughing to eachother.
I'm too busy staring at the retreating jocks to notice when Gerard runs past me, and when I turn around, he's already disappeared. Instead of following after him, I walk in the direction of Ronnie. His back is facing me when I reach the group, so I simply tap him on the shoulder. He spins around and looks down at me.
"What do you want midget?" He spits in my face.
"Dude, that's Frank." Max says in Ronnie's ear. A grin makes its way onto the taller boy's face.
"Oh, so you're the one that the fatass likes." His smug grin makes me have murderous thoughts. "How does it make you feel knowing that we make his life hell everyday, Frank? Does it hurt knowing that you can't save your loverboy? Or are you like us, just waiting for him to commit so he's out of our lives? Fucking waste of space fatass faggot." That's it.
I pull my fist back as far as I can, bringing it forward with all the strength I have in my body. My fist collides with Ronnie's laughing mouth, knocking him to the floor. His friends just stand there, not daring to make a move in fear of what I'll do to them. I should think they're probably shocked, I mean Ronnie's a good 6 or 7 inches taller than my 5ft 3 frame. The entire hallway is silent, waiting to see what happens next. Ignoring them all, I kneel down beside where Ronnie's head lay on the floor. I grab his hair, pulling his ear up to my mouth, so no one can hear what I say next.
"Do you have any fucking idea what you do to him? How you make him feel? You have no idea what he's been through, how much he's suffered. He doesn't eat because of you, because of how you make him feel, what you call him. You know, just two weeks ago I had to save him after he tried to kill himself." I pull myself away, speaking now so everyone can hear.
"So, are you proud of yourselves? Are you proud of what you've done to him? Gerard is the nicest, most amazing person I know, he would never do anything to hurt anyone. What exactly has he done to you, huh? What has he ever done to make you all treat him so badly? Sure he's a little different to you. He doesn't wear the same clothes as you, listen to the same music as you, or even like the same stuff as you do. But my god, he is a much better person than any of you will ever be. You should all be ashamed of yourselves." I look around me and notice that most of the students do look ashamed, some of them not meeting my eye as I scan the hallway.
None of them are making a sound, not even Ronnie has a sarcastic comeback to this. They all know that they're in the wrong. Yeah, well it's too fucking late to be feeling guilty now.
"You can look as guilty as you want, but nothing can change the fact that you have made Gerard's life hell for all these years.... Well, I hope you're happy with yourselves." I finish with a glare directed at everyone.
To be honest, I'm quite shocked that this worked and I wasn't punched after the first sentence that left my mouth. Even if that had happened, it wouldn't have stopped me from saying what I did. At least they know now.
"Frank?" I, along with everyone else in the hall turn towards the sound that breaks the tense silence. Upon doing so, we see a blood spattered Gerard, eyes wide and innocent. He's clearly uncomfortable with the sudden attention as his face turns scarlet and he huches over, hiding behind his hair.
I give a small wave. "Hey, Gee." He looks up slightly and gives a tiny smile.
"Did you- Did you mean that?" Shit, he heard me?
"How much did you hear?" I say quietly, walking towards him and out of ear shot of the nosy bastards surrounding us.
"Uh, everything. I came back after I heard someone get punched. Nice one, by the way. No one has ever done that to Ronnie before." Oh... Maybe I'm going to regret that later. No, I won't actually, because I did it for Gerard. Fuck Ronnie.
"So you heard what I think about you?" Gerard turns a pale pink from embarrassment.
"Did you mean it?" I grab his face- this seems to be turning into a habit of mine- and look up at him.
"Every word." Gerard's eyes turn glassy, but he quickly hides his emotion.
"Frank... No one has ever done anything like that for me before. Thank you so much." He shows his gratitude with a hesitant hug.
When he pulls away, I see that he has blood still pouring from his nose, and a large cut on his lip which I hadn't noticed before.
"Gerard, I thought they only hit you once? You've got a split lip..." He looks at me in a way that makes me feel quite stupid.
"Ronnie and his gang aren't the only people I've bumped into this morning."
"Oh, Gee. I'm so sorry."
"S'not your fault. Anyway, I've had worse. They do what they want, they don't care about anyone else." I put my arm around his shoulder and start walking away from the crowd.
"Let's go clean up your face, okay?" Gerard nods with a wonky smile.
There's no one else in the bathroom when we get there, so I jump up on the side and cross my legs. Gerard just stares at me, not knowing what to do. With a roll of my eyes, I pat the space in front of me.
"You want me to sit there?" Asks Gerard with a raise of his eyebrow.
"No, I want you to grow potatoes there!" I laugh sarcastically. Gerard joins in before hopping up onto the side about a metre away from me..
"Right, first things first... Let's stop your nose from having its period." He gives me a look of disgust, but he can't hide the smile. That beautiful smile. I shake my head, getting rid of all inappropriate thoughts for now.
"Hold the bridge of your nose tightly... That's it. And now take this and just mop up the blood really." Gerard reaches a thin, hoodie clad arm across the wide gap between us, going to take the tissues from my hand.
As he does so, his hoodie sleeve rides up a bit and I pull the tissues away, shocked. He sits there frozen for a minute, before following my gaze to his pale wrist. He snaps his arm back to his side and shoves his sleeve back down again, not meeting my eye.
"Gerard, what was that?" I ask in a shaky voice. All I get in reply is a sniff from the raven haired boy across from me and he jumps down from the side.
"Can I just have a tissue? My nose is bleeding like crazy!" His voice is cracking, and his eyes are darting from side to side, looking anywhere but at me.
"Gerard, I'll ask again. What was that?" My voice is calm, quiet. I think this unnerves Gerard even more because he runs into one of the stalls, grabs some tissue and makes a quick exit from the bathrooms.
I just sit there and stare at the door that just shut me away from Gerard. Holy shit, that was bad. So much red, I don't even know what it was... Or I don't even want to think about what it was. There's no denying that it hasn't crossed my mind before, I mean with all that he's been through. The eating disorder, the suicide attempt... They're almost always accompanied by self harm. No, Gerard wouldn't do that, he's not that stupid is he? I'll ask him another time, I'm sure he has a reasonable explanation for it. He's got to...
** TIME LAPSE **
Mikey, Bob, Alicia and I are all sitting in our usual place at break. I decided not to bring up the subject of Gerard and what I saw to Mikey in front of everyone, I'll tell him later. So instead, we're all currently laughing at Bob after Alicia attacked him with red lipstick and thick eyeliner.... He looks... Different.
"Bob, you kinda look like a hooker right now." Mikey splutters, barely able to get his words out. Bob just scowls and flips Mikey off, taking Alicia's mirror out of her hands.
"Oh, fuck off you douchebag. I think I look kinda cool... Minus the lipstick though, that does make me look like a hooker." He says whilst looking into the silver compact.
"Oh, yeah dude. You look totally hot." I say in a serious voice, trying not to laugh. It is a funny sight though, Bob, the manliest guy I know checking himself out in the mirror.
"Why thank you kind sir." Bob flutters his eyelashes, trying to look seductive but failing miserably.
"Bob, I'm gay and even I don't find that attractive." We all start laughing harder at my comment, even Bob can't contain himself.
Ray chooses this moment to come sauntering over. He just gives us all questioning looks. It's not until Bob lifts his head up that Ray starts laughing as well.
"Oh my God! That's brilliant! You look totally hot, dude." Bob's laughing halts and a slight blush spreads across his face.
What is all that about? "Bob, what's-" I'm cut off by the blonde tank, who's leaning around to look behind Ray.
"Ray, who's the girl?" Holy shit, I didn't even notice her.
The girl in question is rather tall, I'd say about 5ft 7 maybe. She's fairly pretty, pale ivory skin with big green almond shaped eyes, surrounded by a thick layer of eyeliner. She has a very small mouth which is turned down slightly at the corners, and a lip piercing which she is currently nibbling on. Most of her hair is hidden by a Misfits beanie hat, but from what I can see she has long, black hair with a sweeping side fringe covering most of one of her eyes. The tips of her fringe are dyed electric blue, which adds to the awesomeness. Clothing wise, she's wearing a baggy purple Asking Alexandria shirt and a plain black hoodie with holes in the cuffs. On the bottom half, she's wearing red skinnies, which make her legs look like twigs, seriously the girl is skinny. Her knees are turned slightly inwards, like Mikey's. Covering the bottom half of her legs are knee high converse, which are pretty damn cool if you ask me.
"Everyone, this is Becky. She's new here and I said she could hang with us, so... here she is." Ray steps aside so we can all see Becky, who responds with a small wave. "Becky, this is Mikey, Alicia, Bob and Frank." We all wave as he says our names.
"Nice to meet you all. Are you all okay with me being here?" Becky asks nervously with a strong British accent.
"Oh my God, no way! You're British? That's so awesome!" Alicia bursts with excitement, jumping up and running towards her.
It's obvious that Alicia is going for the bear hug, but something about Becky's facial expression tells me that a hug may not be the best idea. Alicia, however fails to notice and only stops when Becky stumbles backwards looking terrified.
"Yeah, I'm British. And I'm sorry, but I really REALLY don't like being touched. I'm okay with like pats on the shoulder and things like that, but hugs freak me out. Way too personal."
Alicia just shrugs. "No problem, that's fine." She sits back down next to Mikey, and Ray joins us on the floor also.
Becky is still standing there awkwardly. "Well, are you going to sit down?"
She seems startled by the question, before realizing that she is in fact the only one left standing. "Right, sorry." I pat the floor beside me.
"You can sit here." She smiles gratefully and takes her place on the dirty ground. I lean over closer towards her, whispering.
"Be prepared... They're gonna ask questions." Her eyes widen in shock, and shakes her head slightly. I just shrug with a smile on my face. "They did the same to me, I've only been here for like a month."
Right on cue, Alicia clears her throat, facing Becky square on in the circle. It almost looks like an interregation for a murder or something.
"So.... Becky. How old are you?"
"What brings you to Belleville?"
"Mum and Dad divorced, I moved with my Mum here."
"Ugh, you expect me to choose? I'll just give you a list. I love Green Day, Black Flag, Asking Alexandria, Avenged Sevenfold and obviously," She points to her beanie hat. "The Misfits. They fucking rock."
Mikey laughs. "I can tell that you and I are gonna get along just fine, Becky." For the first time, her face breaks into a proper smile, it makes her look beautiful.
"Thanks, I appreciate it."
Alicia looks irritated slightly "Wait a second! I haven't finished asking her questions."
"Jesus, Alicia, let the girl breathe m'kay?" Mikey chuckles, giving the small girl a kiss to stop her from talking.
"No, it's fine, honestly. Ask away."
Alicia smiles. "Well, it's just one last one, and it's not even a question. But, tell us more about yourself."
Becky blushes, reaching up to tug on her ear lobe. "Uhm, I guess I could... Well, my full name is Rebecca Amelia Jones but you can call me whatever. Just one thing I have to warn you about, though. You can call me Rebecca, Becky or Beck if you want to, but under no circumstances can you ever- and I mean EVER- call me Becca."
I laugh, slightly confused. "Why? What's wrong with the name Becca?"
"Oh, there's nothing wrong with the name, but it's not MY name. Back in England, all of my teachers called me Becca no matter how many times I corrected them. So, I've kind of grown to resent it. Seriously, please don't call me Becca. People have walked away with black eyes after doing so, just saying."
"Really? You don't really strike me as the feisty type. No offense or anything." Bob chips in nervously.
"Oh, believe me. If somebody was being horrible or 'in your face' then I would smack them so hard round the face."
"Anyway... Umm... Things I like: Music, art, singing- although I suck so bad, coffee, converse and Harry Potter!!! Man, I love me some Harry Potter!... Things I hate: Well, where do I start? I hate peas, sunlight, bastards and barbies, crane flies- Oh my god they're gross! Justin Bieber, the colour pink, sparkly vampires- aka Twilight, ducks, Hitler, my sister, Voldemort, religion, ooh, and a major one for me- Homophobes. I cannot STAND homophobes."
"Religion and homophobes?" Ray asks curiously.
"Well, yeah... They kind of come as a package deal. I hate religion because of all the problems it has caused over the years. The Holocaust for example. What they did to those poor innocent people is just sick! All because of religion, disabilities or sexuality. Homophobes piss me off so much aswell. There was this one boy in my old school who was really religious, and I respected that of course. However, he was one of those people who used religion to undermine others- Basically, one day we somehow got onto the subject of being gay and he just said outright 'It's morally wrong. It just isn't right. The bible states 'Man should not lie with man.'" Or some shit like that and it really fired up my temper. Basically, I told him that the Bible was a load of crap that contradicts itself and he could shove it up his arse. (AN: Again, sorry to any religious people on here, I don't mean to offend anyone!) He walked away from that lesson with scratch marks on his face from where I slapped him. I mean, I know not every religious person is like that, but some of them are hypocrites and I don't like that."
There's a silence from the five of us after listening to Becky's mini rant. She starts to blush. "Not to sound horrible or anything though. I'm not a total bitch or anything."
"No, no!" Ray bursts. "I totally agree with you, I was just shocked at the boys comment, what a narrow minded dick!"
She sighs with relief. "So none of you are religious?"
"And none of you are homophobes?"
"Absolutely not!" The five of us practically shout over eachother.
"Well... It'd be a little bit hypocritical for Frankie boy over here to be a homophobe." Mikey says with a straight face. I hit him.
"Affirmative." I say in a nerdy voice.
"Oh, I had a gay best friend back home. I guess you'll have to take his place then, won't you?" She says with a giggle.
"Uh, most definitely! I mean, come on babygirl, I've been waiting for FOREVER for a girlfriend to go shopping with!!!" I put on my best plastic teen girl voice, which makes everyone crack up.
"Oh, my God Frank. That's so good!" Becky laughs "But, no." The seriousness of her expression makes everyone attempt to stifle their laughter. There's another silence for about three seconds before we all start pissing ourselves again.
After we've all calmed down, a light conversation starts flowing, Becky growing more and more comfortable with each minute. I look over to Mikey, who is looking at Becky with a thoughtful expression on his face. He catches my eye, before saying,
"You thinking what I'm thinking?" I look back over towards the black and blue haired girl, who is still chatting to the others. What is he getting at here?
"Probably not, but do go on..."
"You know who I think she would get along perfectly with?" He asks, gesturing for me to answer the question... Oh. Now I see what he's getting at. It also reminds me of what I'm going to have to break to Mikey later.
"Gerard." I breathe.
So, bro's how was it? Did I disappoint? Just think though, ONLY ONE MORE CHAPTER UNTIL FRERARD!!!! WOO!!!! Rate and review for a happy Becky! Make my day?